Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps

Janet and her dad tell Jonny he must leave the house. After bribes of sex and money, he leaves. Louise is told to return her Piggy Goes Oink library book or she won't graduate. Louise has lost the book.

Janet and her dad tell Jonny he must leave the house. After bribes of sex and money, he leaves. Louise is told to return her Piggy Goes Oink library book or she won't graduate. Louise has lost the book.

David loans Donna a pile of self-help books to read. She finds them all hard work but for Piggy Goes Oink - it's a revelation. Janet is finding it hard in the house without Jonny. Donna visits with Piggy Goes Oink. Louise explains that it's just a kids' book but Donna believes it's more and urges Janet to try - it's a revelation! Janet must get Jonny back.

Gaz is upset at David's influence over Donna. He can't understand her books but Munch suggests a drinking challenge - if Gaz drinks David under the table David will keep away from Donna. Jonny sulks at the bar and is cheered up by Kate the barmaid.

By the end of the evening, Jonny has offered to walk Kate home. Donna finds a drunken Gaz in The Archer with David as sober as a judge. She realizes she loves Gaz and takes him home. Janet tracks down Jonny... only to see him kiss Kate.