Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps

Gaz can't get an erection. He's worried but won't tell Donna. She tells him she's a meeting with her fanciable personal tutor. Jonny realises he hasn't enough money to buy a drink. Louise cuts Janet's cigarette break short - literally!

Gaz can't get an erection. He's worried but won't tell Donna. She tells him she's a meeting with her fanciable personal tutor. Jonny realises he hasn't enough money to buy a drink. Louise cuts Janet's cigarette break short - literally!

Kelly says Louise is going to sack someone. Gaz confesses to Jonny that he's wearing a cock ring. Jonny says all men suffer from impotence at some stage then he tries to steal some CDs as he's poor and homeless and can't go back to Janet - he has his pride.

Philip, Donna's tutor, seems very flirty and they go to the pub. Kelly let's slip that Louise will fire Janet for letting Jonny steal pasties. Gaz tries porn and a sex line when Donna comes in, sexually frustrated thanks to Philip. Gaz says he doesn't fancy her and she leaves.

Jonny drinks directly from the pump in an empty Archer. Janet finds him, angry that he's the reason she's been fired. Jonny admits he's poor and Janet invites him back home. He has his pride and declines. Philip invites Donna over for supper. Janet watched Kelly and Munch play in the bakery when Donna arrives, saying she feels guilty about Philip's invitation. Louise goes power mad and sacks everyone.

Jonny finds Gaz using a vacuum cleaner on his privates. Jonny asks to stay with Gaz. Gaz says 'no' and says he should go back to Janet's. Jonny has his pride. He suggests Gaz see a doctor about his... problem. Louise finds Donna and Janet in The Archer and wants sympathy as she's been. Donna asks Gaz if she looks too tarty for a night in with a friend. With no response from his groin, Gaz says it must be fine. Donna leaves and Gaz makes an emergency medical appointment.

Jonny joins Janet in the pub as she receives confirmation of her job. Jonny tells her he's homeless and Janet invites him back. He says he has his pride. In Janet's house, she appears wearing a pasty bikini and Jonny chases her upstairs to the bedroom.