The Wright Way

Once the enfant terrible of British comedy, Ben Elton has diverted his considerable energy in recent years to writing brash satirical fiction and money-spinning musicals. He hasn't touched television in any major way since 2005 with his short-lived sitcom Blessed, an ill-advised riff on parenting. Now he's back, braving the genre with this six-part series based around the goings on at fictional Baselricky Council Health & Safety Department. It's a hit-and-miss affair. On the one hand, you get to spend time with the superlative David Haig who stars as pernickety department head Gerald Wright, six months post-break-up from his wife and living with daughter Susan (Joanne Matthews) and her ditzy partner Victoria (Beattie Edmondson).

High-octane Haig rules the screen with an admirably dextrous performance reminiscent of Elton himself in its attack and precision. The council setting also has potential, giving Elton the chance to challenge the bureaucracy of small-minded local government - tonight's episode tackles red tape around a rogue speed bump. But despite old-fashioned sitcom aspirations, it's tame stuff compared to Elton's politically charged persona of old, and the laughs are too few.

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It is with relief that I can report that Ben Elton's new comeback series is hilarious! It is a classic situation comedy with great jokes and ... and funny characters who ... who ...

No. I'm sorry, it's no good. You see, it really is no good; in fact, it's a stinker. David Haig plays Gerald Wright (hence the title!), an annoying man who wants everything done a certain way. It's a perennial sitcom trope, done beautifully by Richard Briers in Ever Decreasing Circles, for instance, or 
decently by Chris Barrie in The Brittas Empire. He's a health and safety inspector for a local council, the department "that introduced the static seesaw and the horizontal slide [and said] babies must wear helmets when breastfeeding near the swings".

But what makes it a stinker are the jokes, which feel as though when the BBC moved out of Television Centre they found an old box at the back of the cupboard labelled "Leftover Sitcom Gags 1973". They are ancient, is what I'm saying, they have whiskers on them.

The main running joke involves Wright trying to wash his hands under a bathroom tap and soaking his trousers, and then someone coming in and thinking he's wet himself, and then shoogling about under a hand dryer and someone else coming in and thinking he's doing something filthy. And this happens three times.

Haig tries to make things sound funny by stretching and emphasising certain words - not a stammer, but a sort of word-mastication which would be excellent for someone trying to practice shorthand or audio typing dictation, if anyone still does that nowadays.

The show's token nod to modernity is that Wright lives with his daughter and her female partner (played by Beattie Edmondson, daughter of Elton's old chum Adrian - how cosy). He has to buy a present and they suggest a shop called Girl Shack - wait, Girl Shack? In 2013? I take it Chic Chicks or Trendy Togs or Burdz Boutique were all taken?

Finally, there is the catchphrase: "Don't get me started!" which Wright says when particularly exasperated. This is very nearly "Are you 'avin' a laugh?" from Ricky Gervais' spoof sitcom When The Whistle Blows. Sorry, Ben: this isn't 
the one that's going to win over your critics.