Taskmaster

It has been a particularly close series, but finally the 18th Taskmaster champion is set to be crowned by Greg Davies in this episode, the grand final. Andy Zaltzman, Babátúndé Aléshé, Emma Sidi, Jack Dee and Rosie Jones compete one last time, hoping for the points that will see them lift that storied golden trophy. But who will eat raw onion? Who will spot some tiny chairs? Who will punt a giant egg into the sky? And, most importantly, why is Alex Horne honking?

Prize task: The thing most likely to make your buttocks clench.

- Emma Sidi: A long feathery stick. - 5
- Jack Dee: The sound of a rubber glove snapping, then squirting out some lubricant, then turning on an electric drill. - 5
- Rosie Jones: A used enema. - 4
- Andy Zaltzman: A broken padlock from a now open lion cage, and the lions are roaring that they eat Greg. - 3
- Babatunde Aleshe: A frog. - 2

Task 1: Say how many chairs are in this cinema. You may only give one answer. You must not say any numbers until you give your answer, and you must say the name of every object that appears on the screen. If you miss an object, one minute will be added to your time. For every chair you get wrong, one minute will be added to your time. You have a maximum of ten minutes. Fastest correct answer wins Your time starts when Alex blows his whistle.

- Babatunde: 12:36 (cinema had 333 seats) - 5
- Andy: 13:19 - 4
- Emma: 19:18 - 3
- Rosie: 5:38:39, after accidentally giving the answer 3. - 2
- Jack: Time not given, but he accidentally gave the answer 3, and missed several objects. - 1

Task 2: Either throw five fives in a row, or do 100 press ups, or eat a raw onion, or find the needle in the haystack, or sit silently for ten minutes. You may only attempt two of these things. Fastest wins. Your time starts now.

- Emma: Finds the needle in a tiny haystack in the lab, takes 1:52. - 5
- Andy: Throws five fives in a row, takes 2:40. - 4
- Rosie: Does 100 push ups, takes 10:20. - 3
- Babatunde: Sits silently for ten minutes, takes 12:15. - 2
- Jack: Penalised for failing to throw five fives in a row. - 1

Task 3: Present The Goose. Best The Goose wins. You have a maximum of 30 minutes. Your time starts now.

- Rosie: Creates a French-language production called Le Goose, with Alex playing the title character, who drops golden eggs and dances. - 5
- Emma: Presents a one-act play, with her playing the mother of a boy, played by Alex, where the boy is showing more love to a goose than to her. - 4
- Andy: Makes a nature documentary. - 3
- Jack: Flies a fake plane called The Goose, dropping leaflets to promote Alex's supermarket. - 2
- Babatunde: Mimes a goose and lays a golden egg. - 1

Live task: When Greg says, "Eyes down," you must look down. When Greg says, "Eyes up," you must immediately look at a fellow contestant. If the contestant is also looking at you, you are both eliminated. First to win twice wins. Winner takes all.

- Jack: Wins two rounds. - 5
- Andy (playing hotdog joker), Babatunde, Emma and Rosie. - 0

Final scores

- Emma - 17
- Andy, Jack and Rosie - 14
- Babatunde - 10

Series scores

- Andy - 160
- Jack - 157
- Emma - 152
- Babatunde - 147
- Rosie - 137