Television
TV schedule Saturday 11th March 2017
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Gert And Daisy's Week-end
Wartime comedy about a pair of sisters accompanying a group of children to the country.
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On The Buses
Series 5, Episode 6 - The Busmen's BallThe annual Busmen's Ball comes round once again and Arthur has decided that he and Olive will not be attending such a low-brow affair. Then he discovers what this year's cabaret is going to be...
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Bottom Knocker Street
Episode 1 - Councillor CowdairyAn attempt to repair the chimes of the old ice cream van leads to a visit from a dairy person from another dimension. Councillor Cowdrey sees an opportunity for world domination - or at least his very own chain of cheese shops.
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Auf Wiedersehen, Pet
A selection of episodes from second series of the classic comedy drama.

Bottom Knocker Street
Episode 2 - He Came From Outer SpaceA dull and routine day is interrupted by the arrival of an alien on a mission - to collect a mug of water to fuel his planet's life support system.
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On The Buses
Series 5, Episode 7 - Canteen TroubleCanteen girl Suzy is very good to Stan and Jack when over-serving their meals, and under-charging! Naturally this upsets Blakey, who is determined to beat Jack and Stan at their own game...
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Sooty
Series 2, Episode 2 - The New BuildingIt is the ceremonial grand opening of Mr Slater's new toilet block, but chaos looms when it becomes apparent that builders Sooty and Sweep have forgotten to install the vital component - a toilet! Can they get it fitted in time, or will Richard's career end up round the bend?
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Scream Street
Series 1, Episode 1 - Scream CleanLuke's love for cutting corners gets him into serious trouble when a quick-fix solution to tidying his room puts the whole of Scream Street in danger.
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Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 19 - Royal BeanMr Bean meets the Queen during a visit to Buckingham Palace to replace his favourite, but broken, mug.
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The Belles Of St. Trinian's
The first film set at Ronald Searle's infamous school. The girls of St. Trinian's find themselves involved in a horse racing scam.
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Keeping Up Appearances
Series 5, Episode 2Hyacinth is busy trying to find out why she hasn't received her invitation to the mayor's fancy dress ball and she also wants to get to know some important new neighbours.
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Go Jetters
Series 1, Episode 17 - Table Mountain, South AfricaGlitch wants to ski, so the grimbots give Table Mountain a snowy peak, which threatens its rare plants.
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Go Jetters
Series 1, Episode 19 - Amazon Rainforest, South AmericaGlitch wants a picnic so he stops the rain in the rainforest, upsetting the local tree frogs.
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The Happiest Days Of Your Life
In a Whitehall mix-up, an all-girls' boarding school, St Swithin's, is "re-evacuated" to share the facilities of all-boys' school Nutbourne College.
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dinnerladies
Series 2, Episode 1 - CateringIt's Friday 9th April 1999, the date to conceive a 'millennium baby'. Whilst Tony attempts to humour a rather dim-witted work-experience girl, Bren's main concern is having workmen in to paint the canteen without closing for the duration.
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Mapp & Lucia
TV series based on the 1930s books by EF Benson. Prunella Scales and Geraldine McEwan star.
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Pls Like
Series 1, Episode 5 - TechnologyFor his fifth challenge Liam has to become a brand ambassador for a tech company. But he gets distracted when he meets the woman he fancies, Japanese vlogger Nozomi, and a new dating app throws up a surprise...
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dinnerladies
Series 2, Episode 2 - TroubleJean's husband leaves her for a dental assistant in south Wales, and her colleagues feel the force of her frustration and anger. Meanwhile, Petula has a more-than-slightly surprising announcement to make.
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Carry On Camping
Sid James and Bernard Bresslaw play a pair of likely lads who try to take their prudish girlfriends to a nudist holiday camp.
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Last Of The Summer Wine
A selection of episodes from the sixth and seventh series of Britain's longest-running sitcom.
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Mr Bean
Series 2, Episode 21 - Bean PhoneMr Bean wants a smart phone but they are too expensive - especially when you can build your own!
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Little Roy
Series 1, Episode 26 - Chicken Little RoyBecky has caught the chicken pox. Roy wonders if his big sister will turn into a chicken. Bill and Maura shower Becky with affection, making Roy feel left out and second best. In order to get his fair share of the TLC, Roy pretends to have contracted the cartoon version of the disease.
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Mr Bean
Series 2, Episode 22 - Hotel BeanMr Bean has some unexpected guests who think he runs a hotel!
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Justin's House
Series 4, Episode 16 - Perfect PhotoJustin, Robert, Little Monster and Cat attempt to get ready before famous photographer Iris Shutterspeed arrives to take a group picture to send to Granny Justina.
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Three Men In A Boat
Adaptation of Jerome K Jerome's famed comic novel, starring Laurence Harvey, Jimmy Edwards and David Tomlinson.
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Boomers
Series 1, Episode 2This week, Carol and Trevor celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. With Joyce having organised a gastro-pub lunch, it looks like it could be a party to remember.
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My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
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Only Fools And Horses
1996 Christmas Trilogy, Christmas Special - Time On Our HandsThis third 1996 special was at the time thought to be last that would be made. Rodney's doing a stock take in the garage and has found an artificial leg, some Showaddywaddy LPs and an old watch. They get the watch valued and get just a little shock when it sells at Sotherby's for £6.2 million pounds. After all these years their finally millionaires!
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4 O'Clock Club
Series 6, Episode 1 - AntenatalCan Nero and Clem's summer romance survive the start of term? Can anyone believe Owen's new girlfriend? And is anyone ready for Dexter and Lizzie's big news?
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My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
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4 O'Clock Club
Series 6, Episode 2 - PassWhen Clem gets a part in a TV advert, jealous Nero tries to get himself cast as well. But will either of them be able to sneak out to the filming past prefect Owen?
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Wussywat The Clumsy Cat
Episode 52 - TorchIt is autumn in the garden and Wussywat has found a torch.
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Chance Of A Lifetime
A repeat of this 1950 film.
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Only Fools And Horses
A selection of four episodes of Britain's most popular sitcom.
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Hank Zipzer
A selection of episodes from the second series of the Henry Winkler children's sitcom.
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Little Roy
Series 1, Episode 26 - Chicken Little RoyBecky has caught the chicken pox. Roy wonders if his big sister will turn into a chicken. Bill and Maura shower Becky with affection, making Roy feel left out and second best. In order to get his fair share of the TLC, Roy pretends to have contracted the cartoon version of the disease.
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Mr Stink
TV adaptation of the kids' book written by David Walliams. It's a story about a tramp... who stinks.
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The Boy In The Dress
An adaptation of David Walliams's book about a 12-year-old boy who enjoys cross-dressing.
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Johnny English
He knows no fear. He knows no danger. He knows... nothing! A film about bumbling secret agent Johnny English.
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One Foot In The Grave
Series 6, Episode 5 - The Dawn Of ManVictor's hobby of fishing leads to an encounter with humanity at its most primitive. Patrick's gay brother, Nigel, comes to visit and Victor is asked to give a speech to the WI.
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Justin's House
Series 4, Episode 16 - Perfect PhotoJustin, Robert, Little Monster and Cat attempt to get ready before famous photographer Iris Shutterspeed arrives to take a group picture to send to Granny Justina.

One Foot In The Grave
Series 6, Episode 6 - Things Aren't Simple Any MoreAfter Victor dies in a road accident, Margaret faces up to life without him and vows to take revenge on the hit-and-run driver responsible.

Only Fools And Horses
A selection of episodes from the third series of Britain's most popular sitcom.

Gavin & Stacey
Series 2, Episode 7Stacey returns to Essex to sort out the situation with Gavin, but things are not looking good. Meanwhile in Barry, an unexpected event throws everyone into a panic.
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A Fine Romance
Gentle sitcom about the begrudging and at times difficult romance between two individuals; a translator and a gardener.
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Not Going Out
A selection of episodes from the sixth and seventh series of the Lee Mack sitcom.
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My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
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Duck Quacks Don't Echo
Series 2, Highlights Special - ExtraRelive the most memorable moments from Series 2 of the riotous panel show.
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4 O'Clock Club
Series 6, Episode 2 - PassWhen Clem gets a part in a TV advert, jealous Nero tries to get himself cast as well. But will either of them be able to sneak out to the filming past prefect Owen?
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My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
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Dad's Army
Series 3, Episode 1 - The Armoured Might Of Lance Corporal JonesWalker suggests to Jones that he should loan the platoon his butchers' van, so that he can get free petrol for it. However, Mainwaring is ordered to have the vehicle converted to run on gas, causing more than a few problems and thwarting Walker's plan!
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Men Behaving Badly
A selection of episodes from the sixth series of the laddish sitcom.
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A League Of Their Own
Sports-based panel show fronted by comedians, with a host of sport and celebrity stars.
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Russell Howard Live: Wonderbox
A TV edit of Russell Howard's 2014 DVD.
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Mock The Week
A selection of episodes from the tenth series of the satirical panel game.
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Mrs. Brown's Boys
Series 3, Episode 6 - Mammy Swings!Wedding plans are in full swing as Rory and Dino prepare for their big day. With celebrity wedding planner La La Doggy on board, it looks set to be the wedding extravaganza of the year. But is it really what anybody wants?
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Peter's Friends
A repeat of this 1992 film.
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You, Me And The Apocalypse
Episode 10The end of the world is nigh as the adrenaline-fuelled comedy drama reaches a tense conclusion.
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8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 9 (Channel 4: Series 10), Episode 1Sean Lock and Henning Wehn go up against Jon Richardson and Victoria Coren Mitchell. Tom Allen joins Countdown's resident lexicographer Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, while Rachel Riley looks after the numbers and letters with 'help' from Joe Wilkinson.
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Live At The Apollo
Series 12, Episode 5 - Frankie Boyle, Jack Carroll, Holly WalshGlaswegian comedy giant Frankie Boyle hosts and introduces young stand-up and sensation Jack Carroll and wonderful Holly Walsh to the stage.
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Sam Delaney's News Thing
Episode 10 - Shithouse BritainSam explains why the budget doesn't matter and Britain is already absolutely screwed, while Conservative MP David Davies solves some tricky immigration dilemmas. With Marek Larwood, London Hughes and Geoff Norcott.
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Bottom
Series 1, Episode 1 - SmellsWhilst looking in the newspaper for personals ad inspiration, Richie comes across an advert for pheromones. Could this be the answer to help him lose his virginity?
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A League Of Their Own
Series 7, Highlights Special - Rally SpecialJames Corden and the gang, including comedian Jimmy Carr and Olympian Amy Williams, go head-to-head in the standout challenge from Series 7: the rally car race, as seen back in Episode 1.
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Carry On Forever
Episode 3The final episode looks at how the brand hit the seventies on top form before fading away at the end of the decade.
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Alan Davies: As Yet Untitled
Series 5, Episode 3Alan Davies plays host to Annie Siddons and welcomes back Patrick Kielty, Katherine Ryan and Joe Lycett as they ruminate about parking tickets, the accidental death of a pony and a rather nasty plane crash.
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8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 5 (Channel 4: Series 6), Episode 5Jon Richardson and Bob Mortimer take on Sean Lock and Vic Reeves. Jack Whitehall joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, while Joe Wilkinson 'helps' Rachel Riley.
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This Country
Series 1, Episode 5 - Peeping TomKurtan romantically pursues a girl who has just moved into the village, but finds he has a rival for her affections in his friend Slugs.
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Filthy Rich & Catflap
Episode 4Against all odds, Richie's developed a promising new TV format, but attempts to sell it to the BBC go awry. He soon learns his father is ill, and another potentially lucrative plan comes to mind.
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A League Of Their Own
Series 11, Episode 1James Corden, Freddie Flintoff and Jamie Redknapp are joined by guests Anthony Joshua, Rob Beckett and Roisin Conaty as the sports-based quiz show returns.
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Catastrophe
Series 3, Episode 2Rob and Sharon are still on shaky ground with each other and face challenges in their work lives too.
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Outnumbered
Series 1, Episode 4Ben's fibbing goes to a whole new level as parents at a school football match begin to compliment dad on his friendship with Gordon Brown and his SAS training.
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Lee Evans - The Ultimate Experience
Highlights and brand new excerpts taken from Lee's first three releases.
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The Magnificent Seven Deadly Sins
A collection of short films about the Seven Deadly Sins. Writers include Galton and Simpson, Spike Milligan, Barry Cryer and Graham Chapman.
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Bottom Live
Eddie and Richie get up to more insane antics in the 1993 live stage version of the popular sitcom.
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8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 5 (Channel 4: Series 6), Episode 6Sean Lock and Jason Manford go up against guest captain Sarah Millican, and Jonathan Ross. Bill Bailey joins Susie Dent while Rachel Riley looks after the letters and the numbers.
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Outnumbered
Series 1, Episode 5Ben's on the case again - this time he's got a mystery illness and is far too sick to go to school, or so he says.
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Duck Quacks Don't Echo
Series 4, Episode 3Warwick Davis, Josh Widdicombe and Lorraine Kelly are next to put the world's most startling facts to the test as Lee Mack's riotous panel show continues.
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Drunk History
Series 3, Episode 1In the first episode Chris O'Dowd and Alexander Armstrong star in Joel Dommett's drunken Dambusters. Plus, watch the Impractical Jokers' tipsy take on a presidential disaster, starring Joe Thomas, Joe Wilkinson and Brett Goldstein.
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Not Going Out
Series 6, Episode 7 - MagicWhen Lucy's god-daughter is suddenly dumped on her twenty-four hours before the girl's birthday party, it is left up to Lee to decide on an appropriate entertainment for fourteen nine-year olds.
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Russell Howard & Mum
USA Road Trip - Series 1, Episode 1 - Alien Hunting In NevadaRussell and his mum are off in search of alien life, they're heading to the UFO capital of the USA: Nevada. Russell and Ninette join an alien abductee support group, and meet a woman who can show them how to communicate with extra-terrestrials before they venture out to an alien hot spot in a bid to make contact.
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Father Ted
Series 2, Episode 1 - HellThe time has come for the trio's annual summer holiday, and Father Ted has a fellow priest's caravan in mind as a perfect location.
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Alan Davies: As Yet Untitled
Series 2, Episode 5Giggles guaranteed as QI's klaxon king invites guests Jo Brand, James Acaster, Ricky Tomlinson and Sara Pascoe to crowd round his table for a completely off-the-cuff chat.
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Kevin Bridges - The Story Continues
Young Scottish stand-up comic Kevin Bridges performs his second live tour in front of a packed-out Glasgow arena crowd.
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The Chris Ramsey Show
Series 1, Episode 1Chris Ramsey is joined by Jimmy Carr and Natasia Demetriou who play a game of 'Pet Toy or Sex Toy' before battling a rowdy hen party in Gamewreckers as they go head-to-head in a Just Dance challenge. Chris tries to transform himself into a 'proper Geordie' on a train with helpful tips from Geordie Queen, Vicky Pattison.
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Father Ted
Series 2, Episode 2 - Think Fast, Father TedWith the parochial house falling apart, Ted decides it's time to raise some money, and it seems that a raffle is the best way to do it. Pulling in a favour from Bishop Brennan, he secures a car as the top prize...
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London Irish
A selection of episodes from the first series of the Channel 4 sitcom.
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Comedy Store
Michael McIntyre is in top form with shopping politics, what Brits call extreme weather, Scottish money, and pregnancy tests just a few of the highlights in a classic show!
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Jam
Comedy show from Chris Morris which delivers various unsettling sketches.
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PhoneShop
Series 1, Episode 4 - Bear Bad ManIt's 'Super Sales Wednesday', otherwise known as a 'Family Fun Day' to the annoyed staff of PhoneShop Sutton. As if that wasn't enough, the threatened arrival of a security guard casts a shadow over the day.
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PhoneShop
Series 1, Episode 5 - Salesman Of The MonthFor the first time in years, someone other than Little Gary Patel is in with a chance of being top salesman of the month. As the boys vie for position, Janine moons over her new boyfriend, Don.