Television
TV schedule Wednesday 8th February 2017
In Loving Memory
Series 3, Episode 3 - BowlsScandal hits the Unsworth household when Ivy is seen socialising with a married man. And as she has just warned him of much the same thing, Billy is most amused!
Danger Mouse
Series 1, Episode 34 - Half The World Is Not EnoughDanger Mouse's antics cost Professor Squawkencluck her job. Is this the end of all those wonderful gadgets, or can the world's greatest secret agent get the Professor her job back?
Open All Hours
Series 4, Episode 4 - The Errand Boy ExecutiveTo impress Stephanie, a young lady from the boutique, Granville claims he is an "executive" and that Arkwright is his "faithful old assistant".
Go Jetters
Series 1, Episode 7 - The Statue of Liberty, USAGrandmaster Glitch makes the Statue of Liberty fall right into the path of a passing ferry. Go Jetters, Go!
Justin's House
Series 3, Episode 16 - Robot Of The YearRobert is being judged for a special robot award but he is too nervous to pass all the tests, so Justin decides to take the tests for him.
The Darling Buds Of May
Comedy drama series about H.E. Bates's eccentric Larkin family.
To The Manor Born
Series 2, Episode 3When a valuable antique goes missing from Richard's display of china, suspicion falls upon Audrey - who appears to be suddenly splashing out on a number of home improvements at the Lodge.
Timmy Time
Spin-off from Shaun The Sheep for the CBeebies channel, featuring Timmy the baby lamb and his friends.
To The Manor Born
Series 2, Episode 4An ageing tramp pays his yearly visit to Grantleigh in search of work as a casual labourer. After playing Richard and Audrey off against each other for the duration, he's got one or two revelations left...
Sooty
Series 2, Episode 1 - Fitness FunaticRichard is determined to get into shape at the new health spa. The only problem is that no one has warned him that Sooty, Sweep and Soo are in charge! Is Sweep's swirling jacuzzi about to leave Richard in a spin? Amy Childs of TOWIE and Celebrity Big Brother fame is the guest star.
Twirlywoos
Series 1, Episode 12 - Shorter And ShorterThe Twirlywoos find out how to make something shorter when they unravel a woolly blanket. The Very Important Lady is missing some pieces, and she's not happy about her shorter stature!
One Foot In The Grave
Series 5, Episode 3 - Rearranging The DustVictor and Margaret visit a solicitor to sort out some legal matters. But a long, non-eventful wait then brings more misery.
This Country
Series 1, Episode 1 - ScarecrowKurtan is focusing his attentions on the annual village scarecrow festival, a key event in the village calendar that can both unite and divide the community.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 29, Episode 3 - A Short Introduction To Cooper's RulesJust as PCs Cooper and Walsh master the art of fighting crime from the rear, Barry spoils it all by taking a retired vicar out for the day.
4 O'Clock Club
Series 2, Episode 10 - Rights And ResponsibilitiesA new code of conduct is introduced by Draper, outlining the rights and responsibilities of each pupil.
Spot Bots
Episode 2 - Remote ControlLexi is distracted by an old remote control which can control anything.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 29, Episode 4 - Is Jeremy Quite Safe?A retired jewel thief regales Marina and Davenport with fanciful stories of his past exploits in the South of France. When Aunty Wainwright finds an old safe without a key, who better to open it?
Mapp & Lucia
TV series based on the 1930s books by EF Benson. Prunella Scales and Geraldine McEwan star.
My Family
Series 3, Episode 13 - One Flew Out Of The Cuckoo's NestNick decides to get his own flat but makes sure he gets some support (and money!) from his parents in the process.
My Family
Series 4, Episode 1 - Fitting PunishmentSusan is looking forward to the birth of her first grandchild, but not looking forward to being called a grandmother. Nick wants to move back in. And a new arrival at Ben's surgery has quite an impact.
Shaun The Sheep
Series 2, Episode 7 - Hair Today, Gone TomorrowThe farmer gets ready for a date and wants to look his best, so it's time to dust off his prized hairpiece. Shaun can't resist trying the wig on but loses it while showing off to the flock. The race is on as Shaun and Bitzer try to return the wig in time for the farmer's big night.
As Time Goes By
Series 4, Episode 2 - RewritesThe executives in LA ask Lionel to spice up his script, but life working with Mrs Flack is proving ever-more difficult. Meanwhile, Judith feels thoroughly taken advantage of by Alistair.
Strange Hill High
Series 2, Episode 10 - Mitchell JuniorWhen Mitchell is issued a strange simulation baby doll to teach him responsibility, his first reaction is to bin it. But it keeps coming back and he soon realises that the doll is alive. From apathy to panic, and finally to parenthood, Mitchell soon appreciates that having Mitchell Junior around might not be so bad after all.
One Foot In The Grave
Series 5, Episode 3 - Rearranging The DustVictor and Margaret visit a solicitor to sort out some legal matters. But a long, non-eventful wait then brings more misery.
Twirlywoos
Series 1, Episode 12 - Shorter And ShorterThe Twirlywoos find out how to make something shorter when they unravel a woolly blanket. The Very Important Lady is missing some pieces, and she's not happy about her shorter stature!
Steptoe And Son
Series 7, Episode 3 - Oh, What A Beautiful MourningAlbert Steptoe and his son Harold run a rag and bone business. Harold wants to move on in the world and leave home but his plans are always thwarted.
Keeping Up Appearances
Series 4, Episode 4 - The CommodoreHyacinth agrees to meet the Ladies' Luncheon Club special guest at the railway station, but the assignment proves more difficult than she imagined.
Room 101
Series 2, Episode 3 - Ben Fogle, Janet Street Porter, Greg DaviesPresenter and adventurer Ben Fogle, journalist Janet Street Porter and comic Greg Davies try to dump in Room 101 multi-channel TV, Extreme Fishing With Robson Green and an old man in a village in Spain who appears to hate Greg.
Birds Of A Feather
Series 1, Christmas Special - SailingMiserable at the prospect of her first Christmas without Darryl, Tracey is over the moon when two cruise tickets arrive. That is until Garth calls to say he won't be home. She refuses to go at all, but Sharon and Dorien have a devious plan.
Keeping Up Appearances
Series 4, Episode 5 - Looking At PropertiesThinking small doesn't come easy to Hyacinth - just as Richard feared. He's particularly worried as he has to pick Daddy up from the police station, leaving her to look at holiday homes alone.
Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads?
Series 1, Episode 4 - Moving OnWhen Terry sees the changes that have happened to his home town since he's been away, he is horrified. The labour exchange add to his misery by sending him for a job interview with a company who's staff are all too familiar. He decides to seek out Hughie, an old army buddy, in deepest Berwickshire.
Shaun The Sheep
Series 2, Episode 8 - Bagpipe BuddyThe sheep discover a set of bagpipes on the rubbish dump which they immediately misidentify as a sick emu. They set about trying to nurse it back to health before releasing it back into the wild.
Spot Bots
Episode 2 - Remote ControlLexi is distracted by an old remote control which can control anything.
Dennis The Menace & Gnasher
CBBC series based on the popular Beano comic character Dennis and his dog, Gnasher.
To The Manor Born
Series 2, Episode 3When a valuable antique goes missing from Richard's display of china, suspicion falls upon Audrey - who appears to be suddenly splashing out on a number of home improvements at the Lodge.
Would I Lie To You?
Series 9, Episode 5This week the guests are Clare Balding OBE, Rhod Gilbert, Nick Grimshaw and Rob Delaney.
Yes Minister
Series 2, Episode 5 - The Devil You KnowAngry at being blocked by an E.C. directive, Jim hears worse news of a cabinet reshuffle and a possible move to Brussels. Sir Humphrey would not normally be concerned but he's heard who might replace him!
Gigglebiz
Series 4, Episode 13Accident-prone Gail Force causes chaos in a series of reports from Little Bottom campsite, Dan Step struggles to do a tap dance with a heavy suitcase, and Professor Muddles invents a teleporting hat.
To The Manor Born
Series 2, Episode 4An ageing tramp pays his yearly visit to Grantleigh in search of work as a casual labourer. After playing Richard and Audrey off against each other for the duration, he's got one or two revelations left...
Mr Bean
Series 2, Episode 24 - Caring BeanMrs Wicket is injured and Mr Bean has to look after her - then her demands start to become a pain.
In Loving Memory
Series 3, Episode 4 - Memories Are Made Of ThisThe latest edition of The Undertakers' Journal has a new column, inviting readers to submit articles of interest. Ivy's convinced she has a tale to tell, and sets about writing up the events of 'a typical day', based on their recent exploits with the broken-down hearse.
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 5, Episode 5 - Otherwise EngagedWhen Denise recognises René as her long-lost childhood sweetheart, she sets him free - after beginning arrangements for their wedding. Meanwhile, Helga continues to try to work her way into Gruber's confidence.
Mr Bean
Series 2, Episode 25 - Opera BeanMr Bean's car has broken down and he is late meeting Irma at the opera. Bean finally arrives, but is refused entry because of his filthy attire. Forced to borrow some clothes from the local launderette, Bean is mistaken for the star of the show, and ends up on the stage giving the operatic performance of a lifetime!
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 29, Episode 5 - All That Glitters Is Not ElvisWhen Alvin and Entwistle see Lance trying to convince his wife that Elvis is still alive, they feel a duty to help the King make an appearance.
Carry On Nurse
Much to the nurses' frustration, the patients at Haven Hospital have no intention of lying quietly whilst awaiting surgery or recovery.
Rising Damp
Series 3, Episode 3 - Clunk ClickRigsby turns up at the house with a new sports car, apparently purchased in yet another attempt to woo the lovely Miss Jones. Sadly, his driving doesn't appear to be as stylish as his motor...
Desmond's
Series 4, Episode 2 - Flats, Lies And VideotapeThings soon go horribly wrong when Lee tries to make a Jeremy Beadle-style video for 'You've Been Framed'.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 29, Episode 6 - Eva's Back In TownWhen a worldly-wise old acquaintance of Alvin's makes an appearance, she proves to be just the woman to make Howard's life more complicated.
On The Buses
Series 3, Episode 11 - Going SteadyStan has been going steady with Sally. There's only one snag: she's Blakey's niece.
Steptoe And Son
Series 7, Episode 3 - Oh, What A Beautiful MourningAlbert Steptoe and his son Harold run a rag and bone business. Harold wants to move on in the world and leave home but his plans are always thwarted.
My Family
Series 3, Episode 13 - One Flew Out Of The Cuckoo's NestNick decides to get his own flat but makes sure he gets some support (and money!) from his parents in the process.
Room 101
Series 2, Episode 4 - Deborah Meaden, Paloma Faith, Jason ManfordDragon's Den star Deborah Meaden, singer Paloma Faith and stand-up Jason Manford nominate people who use the phrase "all due respect", Fifty Shades of Grey and Lush into Room 101.
Scream Street
Series 1, Episode 38 - Nightmare NeighboursLuke's master plan to make his room uninhabitable and move in next door with Resus backfires when a pack of vampire rats invades.
Zig And Zag
Episode 8 - It Came From ZogZig and Zag turn their hands to the movie business - but they are only in it for the free popcorn.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 22, Episode 9 - Why Is Barry At An Angle?Barry finds promotion at the building society brings problems.
Keeping Up Appearances
Series 4, Episode 4 - The CommodoreHyacinth agrees to meet the Ladies' Luncheon Club special guest at the railway station, but the assignment proves more difficult than she imagined.
Danger Mouse
Series 1, Episode 8 - The Other Day The Earth Stood StillOnly Danger Mouse can save the world from chaos when the Baron stops the world spinning with a plague of traffic lights.
The Dog Ate My Homework
Series 4, Episode 10Iain Stirling is joined by child team captains Asante and George and special guests Chris Johnson, Dominique Moore, Tom Allen and Luke Kempner.
As Time Goes By
Series 4, Episode 2 - RewritesThe executives in LA ask Lionel to spice up his script, but life working with Mrs Flack is proving ever-more difficult. Meanwhile, Judith feels thoroughly taken advantage of by Alistair.
Keeping Up Appearances
Series 4, Episode 5 - Looking At PropertiesThinking small doesn't come easy to Hyacinth - just as Richard feared. He's particularly worried as he has to pick Daddy up from the police station, leaving her to look at holiday homes alone.
Would I Lie To You?
Series 9, Episode 6This week the guests joining Lee Mack and David Mitchell are Richard Hammond, Sean Lock, Judy Murray and Trevor Noah.
Marley's Ghosts
Series 1, Episode 1Magistrate Marley has an unattentive husband with a failed business, and a lover who's a little too sure of their relationship. In a tragic pairing of accidents, both men die - along with the local vicar. But for Marley, that's only the start...
Mr Bean
Series 2, Episode 24 - Caring BeanMrs Wicket is injured and Mr Bean has to look after her - then her demands start to become a pain.
We Have Been Watching
Episode 1Top comedians and comedy actors, including David Baddiel, Richard Herring, Meera Syal and Josie Lawrence, sit down to watch and chat about classic comedy clips.
Mr Bean
Series 2, Episode 25 - Opera BeanMr Bean's car has broken down and he is late meeting Irma at the opera. Bean finally arrives, but is refused entry because of his filthy attire. Forced to borrow some clothes from the local launderette, Bean is mistaken for the star of the show, and ends up on the stage giving the operatic performance of a lifetime!
Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads?
Series 1, Episode 4 - Moving OnWhen Terry sees the changes that have happened to his home town since he's been away, he is horrified. The labour exchange add to his misery by sending him for a job interview with a company who's staff are all too familiar. He decides to seek out Hughie, an old army buddy, in deepest Berwickshire.
Paul
Sci-fi comedy starring Nick Frost and Simon Pegg as friends who chance upon an alien whilst travelling across the US.
Through The Keyhole
Series 4, Episode 5On the panel this time are Cold Feet actor John Thomson, Coronation Street star Kym Marsh and TV presenter Stephen Mulhern.
No Offence
Series 2, Episode 6With Deering suspended from duty, she runs rogue determined to get Nora. Back at the station, Lickberg tries to control the team, as they urgently up the manhunt for one of the Attahs' missing victims. And an unlikely alliance is agreed between Deering and Nora, who wants to stop an FGM cutter arriving on her patch - and Teegan is sent in under cover.
Yes Minister
Series 2, Episode 5 - The Devil You KnowAngry at being blocked by an E.C. directive, Jim hears worse news of a cabinet reshuffle and a possible move to Brussels. Sir Humphrey would not normally be concerned but he's heard who might replace him!
Marley's Ghosts
Series 2, Episode 1 - Dead Man's ChestMarley moves into her new home and receives a visit from a handsome policeman and the local Neighbourhood Watch, while her ex-lover Michael's past comes back to haunt him.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 12 (Channel 4: Series 13), Episode 1It's Jon Richardson and James Acaster versus Lee Mack and Sarah Millican, with John Cooper Clarke in Dictionary Corner.
The Chris Ramsey Show
Series 1, Episode 5This week, Tom Rosenthal and Tez Ilyas roast members of the audience and play a game of Mario Kart whilst trying not to get electrocuted. TOWIE's Ferne McCann helps one lucky lady find a date on the 11.21 train from London to Newcastle.
Common Sense
Episode 5This week's topics include revelations about Nigel Farage's private life; a blackmail attempt upon David Beckham and his lust for a knighthood; and the blocking of US President Donald Trump's travel ban.
Crackanory
Series 4, Episode 7 - The DisappearanceLondon 1910. An illusionist performs his 'the lady vanishes' act, only to find that she disappears without a trace. So he begins to wonder if he's acquired genuine magic powers. Narrated by Mackenzie Crook, written by Toby Davies.
Plebs
Series 3, Episode 1 - The BeastsThe boys are desperate for tickets to one of the 'Beast shows' at the Games. Marcus meets Delphine, a fiery activist from Gaul, whom he hopes will become his 'Gaul-friend'. Grumio clashes with Landlady, their missing Landlord's formidable mother.
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 5, Episode 5 - Otherwise EngagedWhen Denise recognises René as her long-lost childhood sweetheart, she sets him free - after beginning arrangements for their wedding. Meanwhile, Helga continues to try to work her way into Gruber's confidence.
The Rebel
Series 1, Episode 3 - ArtCharles has been holding the fort at the charity shop when he sells an old urine bottle. Unfortunately it has great sentimental value for Margaret, and also seems to be an apprentice piece by Marcel Duchamp for his famous urinal art-work.
Drunk History
Series 2, Episode 3Isy Suttie tells the story of Prince Edward and Mrs Simpson (featuring Greg James and Sophie McShera), while Ed Gamble narrates his version of The Great Escape (featuring Jamie Laing).
Alan Davies: As Yet Untitled
Series 3, Episode 2Alan is joined by Matt Lucas, John Thomson, Sarah Kendall and Stuart Goldsmith to discuss such varied subjects as upsetting rock legends, impressions, an exploding spider's nest and why comedy and music don't go together.
Peep Show
Series 1, Episode 2 - The InterviewMark decides that Jeremy needs a job, because he is behind with his rent, so he gets him a job application for JLB Finance. Mark then goes to work to carry on his flirtation with Sophie via post-it notes cartoons.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 10 (Channel 4: Series 11), Christmas SpecialJimmy Carr hosts this festive show with Sean Lock and Kathy Burke who take on Jon Richardson and Russell Howard. Joe Lycett joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner, with Rachel Riley and Joe Wilkinson.
Let's Go Crazy
Short comic film starring Peter Sellers in a variety of roles.
Absolutely Fabulous
Series 2, Episode 3 - MoroccoIn Marrakech for a photo shoot, Edina and Patsy look forward to a jaunt full of sex, drugs and shopping. When Saffron disappears into slavery temporarily, however, the two become lost in the desert.
Mock The Week
A selection of three episodes of the satirical panel game.
Peep Show
Series 1, Episode 3 - On The PullJeremy meets Mark in the supermarket and asks him to go to a party. Mark doesn't want to go having been rebuffed earlier by Sophie when he asked her for a date.
Britain's Greatest Hoaxer
Documentary following prankster and comedian Simon Brodkin as he plans and executes a number of audacious stunts.
Not Now, Comrade
A simple car bump is all it takes for a Ministry of Defence Commander to end up harbouring a Soviet dancer attempting to defect to the West.
W1A
Series 1, Episode 3Ian Fletcher's salary comes under intense scrutiny in the press - why should the BBC's Head of Values be paid more than the prime minister?
Getting On
Series 2, Episode 1There's more grim humour among the bedpans as a new shift unfolds on B4. Kim has an unknown female admission to occupy her, Den has Hilary to cope with, and Pippa has a ward round. Mrs Fyvie, a new patient, is admitted but it's her daughter, Beedy, who requires more attention than her mother.
Getting On
Series 2, Episode 2While Den and Matron Hilary Loftus are flirting behind closed doors, an incident on the ward triggers the blame game. Meanwhile, Pippa receives good news about her faecal forum paper, and the arrival of consultant Peter Healy further lightens her mood.
Run Fatboy Run
Having previously jilted his fiancée at the altar, Dennis Doyle attempts to win her back by running a marathon.
Cool It, Carol!
Joe Sickles and Carol Thatcher decide to head to London for work but the naïve couple soon become drawn to the more seedy side of the capital.
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Topical Channel 4 comedy panel show hosted by Jimmy Carr. The questions are based on survey results and statistics.
The Rebel
Series 1, Episode 3 - ArtCharles has been holding the fort at the charity shop when he sells an old urine bottle. Unfortunately it has great sentimental value for Margaret, and also seems to be an apprentice piece by Marcel Duchamp for his famous urinal art-work.
The Alternative Comedy Experience
Series 2, Episode 5 - NerdsKevin Eldon shares tonight's bill with performance poet Paul Hamilton, Trevor Lock, Paul Foot, and superbly funny science nerd Helen Arney. Backstage interviews by Stewart Lee.
Crackanory
Series 4, Episode 7 - The DisappearanceLondon 1910. An illusionist performs his 'the lady vanishes' act, only to find that she disappears without a trace. So he begins to wonder if he's acquired genuine magic powers. Narrated by Mackenzie Crook, written by Toby Davies.
You, Me & Them
Series 2, Episode 5 - The GiftDebs is upset when her dad Clive gives Lauren five grand towards her upcoming wedding to Ed. Whilst Nola, an old friend of Emma makes an unexpected visit and reveals a shocking secret at family lunch; together they were exotic dancers called Coffee and Cream in the 60s. Meanwhile in a bid to kick-start his love life Alan's alternative date shows great potential.
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 10 (Channel 4: Series 11), Episode 7David Mitchell and Cariad Lloyd take on Jon Richardson and Russell Howard. Sam Simmons joins Countdown's resident lexicographer Susie Dent.
Monty Python's Personal Best
Episode 3 - John CleeseThis episode begins with a spoof memorial to 'the late' John Cleese before cutting to a series of new sketches performed by the Pythons.
You, Me & Them
Series 2, Episode 6 - The Origami Butterfly EffectA shock announcement from Tim and Ellie leaves Lauren pondering and Ed hysterical. Debs' bid to change her ways comes with disastrous consequences, meanwhile Keith and Clive push their relationship to the brink of breaking after a run-in.
Black Books
Series 1, Episode 5 - The Big Lock-OutA new security system ensures Manny is locked in and Bernard out. Fran is obsessed by the voice of an old friend.
Ross Noble Freewheeling
Series 2, Episode 4Random roadtrip adventures with the Geordie comic. Ross brightens up a grandma's day, tries to unite the mods and rockers, and helps jobseekers in Sussex find work experience!
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Series 11, Episode 10The boys and their guests thrash out the hot topics of the week by examining surveys, opinion polls and statistics; from the silly to the serious, from celebrity gossip to world politics. With guests Dr Christian Jessen, Russell Kane, Kimberley Walsh and Josh Widdicombe.
Black Books
Series 1, Episode 6 - He's Leaving HomeManny runs away from Black Books, much to Fran's dismay and Bernard's indifference.
Psychobitches
Series 1, Episode 2Steve Pemberton plays an unusually gruff Dian Fossey. Katy Brand's pork pie-munching Diana Dors is confronted by Sam Spiro's glamorous Marilyn Monroe, while Sharon Horgan gives her take on a brooding Virginia Woolf and a love-struck Cleopatra.
The Alternative Comedy Experience
Series 2, Episode 4 - A Minute Of SilenceTonight's episode of the 'connoisseurs stand-up show of choice' features Tony Law, David Kay, Susan Calman, Michael Legge, and musical storytellers Ginger & Black. Stewart Lee meets them backstage.