Television
TV schedule Wednesday 2nd September 2015
6am
(repeat)
Never The Twain
Series 3, Episode 5 - The Welsh ConnectionSimon and Oliver join forces to resist their children's attempts to put them on a diet and exercise plan, but avarice and skullduggery undoes the alliance.
6am
(repeat)
Bottom Knocker Street
Episode 21 - The Treasure MapA treasure map creates excitement for the kids in Bottom Knocker Street.
6:15am
(repeat)
Bottom Knocker Street
Episode 39 - Voice Over ManThe street is plagued by the arrival of an escaped voice from a satellite computer.
7am
(repeat)
Minder
Series 5, Episode 4 - The Second Time AroundWhen an author friend of Arthur's learns that her ex-husband has sold her house without permission, she hires Terry to help with ideas and Arthur to help get the money back.
7am
(repeat)
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 33 - Cat SittingWhen his landlady is involved in an accident, Mr Bean is left to care for her vicious cat Scrapper.
7:15am
(repeat)
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 34 - The BottleMr Bean's prized ship in a bottle ends up on a milkman's float, leading to a mission to get it back from the local dairy.
7:30am
(repeat)
One Foot In The Grave
Series 1, Episode 2 - The Big SleepMargaret tries to help her husband cope with early retirement by getting him a book from the library entitled Coping with Old Age.
8am
(repeat)
Monarch Of The Glen
Series 4, Episode 6Comedy drama set in the Scottish Highlands, based on the comic novels of Compton Mackenzie.
8:20am
(repeat)
Justin's House
Series 1, Episode 20 - The Wishing WardrobeJustin discovers there's a fancy dress day taking place in Justin Town. He's very excited, but what should he wear? And will they ever find out why magical things keep happening in the house?
8:55am
(repeat)
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 21 - GoldfishWith his beloved teddy bear at the dry cleaners, Mr Bean finds a new playmate from the garden pond.
9am
(repeat)
Last Of The Summer Wine
A selection of episodes from the 14th series of Britain's longest-running sitcom.
9am
(repeat)
Boj
Episode 29 - Puppet ShowBoj helps Mia to look after the Twitchlets, but they quickly get stuck putting on a never-ending puppet show! How can they get the Twitchlets to entertain themselves?
9:10am
(repeat)
Mr Bean
Series 1, Episode 22 - InventorWhen an inventor moves into the empty room in the attic, he and Bean try to out-invent each other.
9:30am
(repeat)
Mr Bean
A selection of four episodes of the animated version of Rowan Atkinson's comic creation.
9:30am
(repeat)
9:35am
(repeat)
Twirlywoos
Series 2, Episode 13 - Bigger And BiggerThe Twirlywoos see children building a sandcastle at the beach, and decide to make it bigger. Back in the Boat they encounter a strange jelly which grows every time they touch it!
9:55am
(repeat)
The Darling Buds Of May
Comedy drama series about H.E. Bates's eccentric Larkin family.
11:30am
(repeat)
Mr Bean
A selection of four episodes of the animated version of Rowan Atkinson's comic creation.
12pm
(repeat)
My Family
Series 1, Episode 3 - Droit De Seigneur BenWhen Brigitte sets Janey up on a date with the son of Lord Whitten, she is over the moon because "he's absolutely gorgeous".
12:40pm
(repeat)
My Family
Series 1, Episode 4 - The Last ResortFor Susan's 40th birthday, Ben... or rather Janey... decides that he and Susan should go away for the weekend.
12:50pm
(repeat)
Minder
Series 5, Episode 6 - The Long Ride Back To ScratchwoodArthur scores an own goal when he is persuaded to buy up 2,000 tickets for the England v Scotland football match at Wembley.
1pm
(repeat)
Yes, Prime Minister
Series 2, Episode 3 - A Diplomatic IncidentWhen the former PM dies unexpectedly of a heart attack, a state funeral is announced. Unfortunately that means a chance for the French to cause a diplomatic incident to use as a bargaining tool for important upcoming Channel Tunnel negotiatoins - never knowingly reasonable!
1pm
(repeat)
Mr Bean
A selection of four episodes of the animated version of Rowan Atkinson's comic creation.
1pm
(repeat)
Boj
Episode 29 - Puppet ShowBoj helps Mia to look after the Twitchlets, but they quickly get stuck putting on a never-ending puppet show! How can they get the Twitchlets to entertain themselves?
1pm
(repeat)
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 4, Episode 11 - The Bells Are RingingYvonne's new health drink is about to go into production, but Gary is more concerned with what Phoebe is about to produce.
1:20pm
(repeat)
Keeping Up Appearances
Series 1, Episode 1Daddy is taken to hospital - quite inconvenient on the evening of Hyacinth's latest candle-lit supper.
1:30pm
(repeat)
Yes, Prime Minister
Series 2, Episode 4 - A Conflict Of InterestThe next Governorship of the Bank of England is up for discussion just as a scandal looks set to break out in the City. It'd hardly be an easy choice for Hacker at the best of times, but Sir Desmond Glazebrook appears to have his eye set on the role.
1:30pm
(repeat)
1:35pm
(repeat)
Twirlywoos
Series 2, Episode 13 - Bigger And BiggerThe Twirlywoos see children building a sandcastle at the beach, and decide to make it bigger. Back in the Boat they encounter a strange jelly which grows every time they touch it!
1:40pm
(repeat)
A Fine Romance
Gentle sitcom about the begrudging and at times difficult romance between two individuals; a translator and a gardener.
1:45pm
(repeat)
Yes, Prime Minister
Series 2, Episode 3 - A Diplomatic IncidentWhen the former PM dies unexpectedly of a heart attack, a state funeral is announced. Unfortunately that means a chance for the French to cause a diplomatic incident to use as a bargaining tool for important upcoming Channel Tunnel negotiatoins - never knowingly reasonable!
2pm
(repeat)
The Magnet
Ealing Studios comedy about a boy who deceitfully acquires a powerful magnet from a younger boy.
2pm
(repeat)
One Foot In The Grave
Series 1, Episode 2 - The Big SleepMargaret tries to help her husband cope with early retirement by getting him a book from the library entitled Coping with Old Age.
2pm
(repeat)
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 9, Episode 1 - Gone With The WindmillHaving been double-crossed by Herr Flick, Gruber and the Colonel are looking for a way to un-desert. Madame Edith concocts a plot that will appear that they have been kidnapped. Unfortunately, the General fails to take the hint and René is forced to save the duo before they are blown up...
2:15pm
(repeat)
Yes, Prime Minister
Series 2, Episode 4 - A Conflict Of InterestThe next Governorship of the Bank of England is up for discussion just as a scandal looks set to break out in the City. It'd hardly be an easy choice for Hacker at the best of times, but Sir Desmond Glazebrook appears to have his eye set on the role.
2:20pm
(repeat)
Birds Of A Feather
Series 7, Episode 8 - Are You Being Served?Sharon's feeling broody, and on the look out for a man to make her pregnant. Meanwhile, Dorien's incensed that her holiday romance wasn't as it appeared: but she's determined to make it work for her.
2:30pm
(repeat)
2:40pm
(repeat)
Open All Hours
Pilot, Episode 1 - Open All HoursMiserly shopkeeper Arkwright has lustful designs upon his neighbour, a nurse. Meanwhile, his nephew Granville longs for the merest chance of a romantic liason with any woman who'll give him a second glance!
2:45pm
(repeat)
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 9, Episode 1 - Gone With The WindmillHaving been double-crossed by Herr Flick, Gruber and the Colonel are looking for a way to un-desert. Madame Edith concocts a plot that will appear that they have been kidnapped. Unfortunately, the General fails to take the hint and René is forced to save the duo before they are blown up...
2:50pm
(repeat)
Shaun The Sheep
Series 2, Episode 35 - Foxy LaddieA fox arrives at the farm, disguising himself as a handsome ram to infiltrate the flock and eat Timmy! All the lady sheep are beguiled by this charming new arrival, especially Shirley. Shaun becomes suspicious when the fox's cunning disguise begins to fail.
2:55pm
(repeat)
Shaun The Sheep
Series 2, Episode 36 - Shaun Goes PottyThe farm takes delivery of a brand new pool table. Before the farmer can take it indoors, Bitzer and the flock have a game, with disastrous cloth-ripping consequences. They must repair the damage before the farmer finds out.
3pm
(repeat)
Mr Bean
A selection of four episodes of the animated version of Rowan Atkinson's comic creation.
3pm
(repeat)
Monarch Of The Glen
Series 4, Episode 6Comedy drama set in the Scottish Highlands, based on the comic novels of Compton Mackenzie.
3:15pm
(repeat)
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 9, Episode 2 - A Tour De FranceRené is being held hostage, and missing presumed exploded by the Nazis, the Resistance, and the girls at the café. As they plan tributes to their fallen hero, he is desperate to escape being shared around by the Communists in their underground bunker!
3:20pm
(repeat)
Open All Hours
Series 1, Episode 1 - Full Of Mysterious Promise"Why don't we get engaged before we both grow a moustache?"
What's more fruitless - Arkwright's pursuit of Nurse Gladys Emmanuel, or his attempt to sell tins of food without labels?
4pm
(repeat)
Last Of The Summer Wine
A selection of episodes from the 14th series of Britain's longest-running sitcom.
4:15pm
(repeat)
In Loving Memory
Series 4, Episode 7 - Do You Take This Woman?Ernie falls in love. Besotted, he begs Ivy to stop him from ruining his life by proposing! Billy is in agreement: he knows Ernie's new girlfriend, Mary, from his childhood. When the pair get caught in a storm, old truths will out.
4:25pm
(repeat)
Gigglebiz
Series 3, Episode 17Well-meaning Humphrey causes problems for his neighbour when they set up stalls next to each other at an outdoor sale, mischievous King Flannel plays pirates, Farmer Dung and his friend Reggie make some strange noises on the farm and lovable old storyteller Storybook Stan has problems with a broken book.
4:50pm
(repeat)
Never The Twain
Series 3, Episode 6 - Not On The Same WavelengthSimon and Oliver forge an uneasy pact when they learn that Lyn is expecting, but tensions arise when they agree to be interviewed on a local radio station.
5:20pm
(repeat)
On The Buses
Series 6, Episode 1 - No Smoke Without FireBlakey has introduced no-smoking rules after a discarded cigarette nearly burned the depot down. He instructs all crews to attend a special course on fire fighting, and soon Stan is challenged to give up the habit...
5:35pm
(repeat)
The Darling Buds Of May
Comedy drama series about H.E. Bates's eccentric Larkin family.
6pm
(repeat)
My Family
Series 1, Episode 3 - Droit De Seigneur BenWhen Brigitte sets Janey up on a date with the son of Lord Whitten, she is over the moon because "he's absolutely gorgeous".
6pm
(repeat)
A Fine Romance
Gentle sitcom about the begrudging and at times difficult romance between two individuals; a translator and a gardener.
6:40pm
(repeat)
My Family
Series 1, Episode 4 - The Last ResortFor Susan's 40th birthday, Ben... or rather Janey... decides that he and Susan should go away for the weekend.
6:40pm
(repeat)
As Time Goes By
Series 7, Episode 7 - The ProposalSandy is still refusing to talk to Harry so Jean tries to find a way to patch things up. Things are very different for Judy when Alistair proposes!
7:20pm
(repeat)
Miranda
Series 2, Episode 1 - The New MeStevie has her work cut out trying to stop Miranda spending all day in her pyjamas with a packet of biscuits for company, feeling sorry for herself that Gary departed for Hong Kong taking with him her chance of any relationship... no matter how unlikely that was.
7:20pm
(repeat)
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 4, Episode 11 - The Bells Are RingingYvonne's new health drink is about to go into production, but Gary is more concerned with what Phoebe is about to produce.
8pm
(repeat)
Porridge
Series 1, Episode 1 - New Faces, Old HandsIt's New Year's Day, and Fletch enters Slade Prison, along with two fellow prisoners, returning resident Heslop and new boy Godber. Fletch introduces Godber to the ways of survival inside - "little victories" over the warders and other staff - although his scheming doesn't quite have the desired effect.
8pm
(repeat)
8pm60 min version (repeat)
8:40pm
(repeat)
Porridge
Series 1, Episode 2 - The HustlerGambling fever has hit Slade - subjects include the number of bricks in a cell, and the number of eggs laid by the hens on the prison farm. Fletch has organised a big game in a secret location, but will anyone actually win?
9pm
(repeat)
Da Ali G Show
A selection of episodes from the second series of Sacha Baron Cohen's comic creation.
9pm
(repeat)
Drifters
Series 1, Episode 1 - HomeReturning early to Leeds from a post-university gap-year tour of India, cousins Meg and Bunny - and friend Laura - do not get the smooth homecoming they had hoped for.
9pm
(repeat)
Kevin & Perry Go Large
Film spin-off for the popular Harry Enfield characters. Kevin and Perry visit Ibiza.
9pm
(repeat)
Bad Education
Series 1, Episode 2 - Sex EducationAlfie becomes embroiled in a web of horror when an exercise in parental appeasement goes disastrously wrong. It's not long before he finds himself leading a sex education class in front of students, parents, angry Mumsnet users, and a couple of foreign exchange students...
9pm
(repeat)
Duck Quacks Don't Echo
Series 3, Episode 1The fact-busting comedy panel series hosted by Lee Mack returns as Jerry Springer, Emma Bunton and Jason Byrne put further fascinating titbits to the test.
9pm
(repeat)
Room 101
Series 1, Episode 5 - Alistair McGowan, Hilary Devey, Josh GrobanThis week Alistair McGowan, Hilary Devey and Josh Groban try to send the things they hate the most into Room 101. Nominations include children, Valentine's Day and smoking bans.
9pm
(repeat)
Through The Keyhole
Series 3, Episode 1Gino D'Acampo, Corrie battle-axe Sue Cleaver and comedian Johnny Vegas try to guess whose house Keith Lemon is in.
9:20pm
(repeat)
The Catherine Tate Show
Series 1, Episode 1A young couple has to live in their car for their baby's sake, Claire is 'not drunk enough' and Nan accuses a social worker of stealing her clothes. Also, is Beyoncé "bling bling" or "bing bing"?
9:30pm
(repeat)
Drifters
Series 1, Episode 2 - ScabiesMeg scores a hot date, much to Laura and Bunny's amazement. But it's after gate-crashing a party that things get really complicated.
9:40pm
(repeat)
Room 101
Series 1, Episode 2 - Gregg Wallace, Gabby Logan, Sarah MillicanThis week Gregg Wallace, Gabby Logan and Sarah Millican try to send the things they hate the most into Room 101. Nominations include cashpoints, buffets and anti-social cats.
10pm
(repeat)
Mrs. Brown's Boys
Series 1, Episode 2 - Mammy's SecretMrs Brown is concerned that her family are keeping too many secrets. Her daughter, Cathy, won't tell anyone about her new boyfriend and son Mark won't tell anyone why wife Betty has thrown him out.
10pm
(repeat)
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 4 (Channel 4: Series 5), Episode 3Vic Reeves and Jo Brand take on the words and numbers. Adam Buxton is in with Countdown's resident lexicographer Susie Dent. Plus a special appearance from comedian Rob Beckett.
10pm
(repeat)
10pm30 min
Top Coppers
Episode 3 - The Venom Of Dr SchaferMahogany and Rust investigate the mysterious disappearances near Dr Schafer's top secret medical research lab. When the questioning goes awry, Mahogany is injected with a lethal serum - giving him 24 hours to live. Will his partner Rust be able to help him find the antidote, or is he too caught up trying to impress lab assistant Gail?
10:05pm
(repeat)
Lee Evans: Roadrunner
TV broadcast of Lee Evans's 2011 stand-up show and release, Roadrunner.
10:20pm
(repeat)
Taskmaster
Series 1, Episode 6 - The Last SupperIn the last episode of the series the five comics are not only playing for homemade chowder but also for the inaugural Taskmaster series winner's trophy. Tasks include: playing golf with eggs and cooking a meal using ingredients starting with every letter of the alphabet.
10:30pm
(repeat)
Bad Education
Series 3, Episode 1 - StrikeThe summer term has started, and Fraser's got the school into dire financial straits. Things are so bad he's got to sack a member of staff, but Miss Gulliver is not going to let it happen without a fight.
10:40pm
(repeat)
Miranda
Series 2, Episode 2 - Before I DieMiranda's recent experience in the graveyard gets her thinking. This week she starts to worry what her life is all about and what people would say at her funeral.
11pm
(repeat)
The Kumars
Episode 5Find out what Caroline Quentin, Richard E Grant] and Silent Witness star Emilia Fox have been up to in this episode of the comedy chat show.
11pm
(repeat)
Birds Of A Feather
Series 7, Episode 8 - Are You Being Served?Sharon's feeling broody, and on the look out for a man to make her pregnant. Meanwhile, Dorien's incensed that her holiday romance wasn't as it appeared: but she's determined to make it work for her.
11:05pm
(repeat)
8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Series 6 (Channel 4: Series 7), Episode 16Jimmy Carr hosts a new edition of the panel game, with Sean Lock and Sara Pascoe who take on Jon Richardson and Josh Widdicombe. Susie Dent is joined by Alex Horne & The Horne Section in Dictionary Corner, while Rachel Riley looks after the numbers and letters.
11:05pm
(repeat)
Mountain Goats
Episode 3 - DogJimmy loses Bill's favourite dog, Tom Jones. Jimmy then loses Bill and the team go on a mountain rescue for one of their own.
11:20pm
(repeat)
Absolutely Fabulous
2011 Christmas Specials, New Year Special - JobEdina has some crucial questions to answer, including: Has she still got it? And could a new client destroy her relationship with Saffy or make it stronger?
11:20pm
(repeat)
Mock The Week
A selection of four episodes from the satirical panel game.
11:35pm
(repeat)
Mountain Goats
Episode 3 - DogJimmy loses Bill's favourite dog, Tom Jones. Jimmy then loses Bill and the team go on a mountain rescue for one of their own.
Midnight
(repeat)
Outnumbered
Series 1, Episode 2The celebration of parental incompetence continues, with the problems piling up for mum and dad.
12:15am
(repeat)
Safeword
Series 1, Episode 6The guests in this episode are TOWIE regular Gemma Collins and former X Factor judge Louis Walsh, alongside comics Dane Baptiste and Tom Davis. Which of this week's celebrities will be bottling out first?
12:30am
(repeat)
PhoneShop
Series 3, Episode 1 - Baking BadThings are looking up for Lance: he's found something very naughty in the shed, and, after years of waiting, he's been admitted to the private member's club of his dreams. Now all he needs to do is make it to the end of the day without anything going wrong. Oh...
12:30am
(repeat)
Top Coppers
Episode 3 - The Venom Of Dr SchaferMahogany and Rust investigate the mysterious disappearances near Dr Schafer's top secret medical research lab. When the questioning goes awry, Mahogany is injected with a lethal serum - giving him 24 hours to live. Will his partner Rust be able to help him find the antidote, or is he too caught up trying to impress lab assistant Gail?
12:35am
(repeat)
The Last Leg
Series 6, Episode 10Adam Hills and co-hosts Josh Widdicombe and Alex Brooker are joined by Katherine Ryan.
12:40am
(repeat)
The Thick Of It
Series 4, Episode 5As the key worker housing sell-off continues to unravel, both Government and Opposition are left scrambling for the moral high ground, flinging dirt back down behind them.
1am
(repeat)
PhoneShop
Series 3, Episode 2 - Nick Nack PaddywhackAshley's in the doghouse with Jerwayne after causing a girl-drought of epic proportions. Can Jerwayne get the interest of the Zara girls once again, or has Ashley wrecked their chances on the high street for good?
1:20am
(repeat)
Mrs. Brown's Boys
Series 1, Episode 2 - Mammy's SecretMrs Brown is concerned that her family are keeping too many secrets. Her daughter, Cathy, won't tell anyone about her new boyfriend and son Mark won't tell anyone why wife Betty has thrown him out.
1:30am
(repeat)
Peep Show
A selection of episodes from the fifth series of the Mitchell and Webb sitcom.
1:30am
(repeat)
Fake Reaction
Series 2, Episode 7Guests facing naked old lady painting, a bungee rope can-can, alien goo and offal burgers this time are Olympic ski jumper and winner of Splash, Eddie 'The Eagle' Edwards, The Big Reunion's Dane Bowers, comedian Stefan Abingdon and Hollyoaks star Nikki Sanderson.
1:40am
(repeat)
Threesome
Series 1, Episode 7The threesome prepares for Alice's 'Final Push Party' with some questionable costume choices from the boys...
2am
(repeat)
The Catherine Tate Show
Series 1, Episode 1A young couple has to live in their car for their baby's sake, Claire is 'not drunk enough' and Nan accuses a social worker of stealing her clothes. Also, is Beyoncé "bling bling" or "bing bing"?
2am
(repeat)
Very British Problems
Series 1, Episode 3 - Feelings And EmotionsThis week the celebrities talk about Brits' excruciating inability to express emotions and feelings.
2:40am
(repeat)
Absolutely Fabulous
2011 Christmas Specials, New Year Special - JobEdina has some crucial questions to answer, including: Has she still got it? And could a new client destroy her relationship with Saffy or make it stronger?
3:05am
(repeat)
Threesome
Series 1, Episode 7The threesome prepares for Alice's 'Final Push Party' with some questionable costume choices from the boys...
3:10am
(repeat)
Outnumbered
Series 1, Episode 2The celebration of parental incompetence continues, with the problems piling up for mum and dad.
3:30am
(repeat)
Grouchy Young Men
Young male celebrities, including many comics, bitch and complain about life in modern Britain.