TV schedule for 18th February 2014 (full list)

6am (repeat)

French Fields

Series 1, Episode 5 - Who's Been Eating My Porridge?

Still none-too-keen on the idea of William returning for lunch each day, Hester's determined to send him to the office with sandwiches. Meanwhile, back at the house, Madame Remoleux is proving worse than useless, but Hester's determined to serve up a proper English meal for a dinner party.

6:15am (repeat)

Ever Decreasing Circles

Series 2, Episode 2

Paul has outstanding abilities on the cricket field. Martin knows this and he should make him the first name on the team sheet - but can he bring himself to pick his unwitting rival?

6:45am (repeat)

Harry Hill's TV Burp

Series 2, Episode 1

Harry gets a new chair for Steve McDonald from Coronation Street. Plus, we see the world through Terry's eyes on Emmerdale.

7:10am (repeat)

'Allo 'Allo!

Series 1, Episode 7 - The Dance Of Hitler Youth

The Colonel organises a party in the café, purportedly to celebrate the burning of the Reichstag, but in fact just to get Flick out of his apartment whilst it is broken into.

7:50am (repeat)

As Time Goes By

Lionel and Jean were young lovers until accidentally losing touch. Years later they meet again by chance and unexpectedly rekindle their romance.

8:30am (repeat)

Goodnight Sweetheart

Series 2, Episode 1 - Don't Get Around Much Anymore

Six months after time-travelling philanderer Gary turned his back on 1940, Ron persuades him to return for the one big deal which will set them up for life.

8:30am (repeat)

Timmy Time

Spin-off from Shaun The Sheep for the CBeebies channel, featuring Timmy the baby lamb and his friends.

9:10am (repeat)

Keeping Up Appearances

Series 5, Episode 2

Hyacinth is busy trying to find out why she hasn't received her invitation to the mayor's fancy dress ball and she also wants to get to know some important new neighbours.

9:50am (repeat)

2point4 Children

Series 7, Episode 7 - The Heart Has Its Reasons

Having dropped off Jenny at university in the East End, Bill and Ben find the van being looted by a group of pre-teen tearaways. They manage to catch one of the group, Declan, but are more moved than angry when he explains he has no parents.

10:05am (repeat)

Dani's Castle

Series 1, Episode 2 - City Boy

Jimmy discovers things in the country are not as simple as he thinks. Dani gets some dance training for the annual Bogmoor Ball.

10:30am (repeat)

Last Of The Summer Wine

Series 22, Episode 5 - Enter The Hawk

Billy Hardcastle finds that having a friend with a powerful pinstriped suit is adventurous enough.

11:05am (repeat)

All At Sea

Series 1, Episode 5 - Biscuits

Charlie's mum is upset when someone takes two of the special biscuits she was saving for her school reunion. Incorrectly blamed for taking them, Charlie sets about trying to find out who the real culprit is.

11:10am (repeat)

Last Of The Summer Wine

Series 22, Episode 6 - Gnome And Away

Howard has a problem delivering a gift.

11:50am (repeat)

Ever Decreasing Circles

Series 2, Episode 2

Paul has outstanding abilities on the cricket field. Martin knows this and he should make him the first name on the team sheet - but can he bring himself to pick his unwitting rival?

12:30pm (repeat)

dinnerladies

Series 2, Episode 2 - Trouble

Jean's husband leaves her for a dental assistant in south Wales, and her colleagues feel the force of her frustration and anger. Meanwhile, Petula has a more-than-slightly surprising announcement to make.

1:10pm (repeat)

Only Fools And Horses

Series 2, Episode 3 - A Losing Streak

Del's been dealt a few dodgy hands by Boycie in their card school and he's losing money rapidly. Believing that a losing streak can't last forever, he invites Boycie round for another poker game to win back his money, and is prepared to back himself with everything he owns... including Grandad's tellies!

1:50pm (repeat)

Only Fools And Horses

Series 2, Episode 5 - The Yellow Peril

After a mysterious call from the health inspector, the local Chinese restaurant employ the Trotters to renovate their kitchens. Trigger supplies the paint but neglects to tell them exactly where he got it from.

2pm (repeat)

Birds Of A Feather

Series 5, Episode 13 - The Beautiful Game

Tracey manages a boys' football team, while Dorien finds a psychic who will change her life.

2:25pm (repeat)

Harry Hill's TV Burp

Series 2, Episode 1

Harry gets a new chair for Steve McDonald from Coronation Street. Plus, we see the world through Terry's eyes on Emmerdale.

2:40pm (repeat)

Jam & Jerusalem

A comedy drama about the members of a Women's Guild in a small West Country village called Clatterford.

2:55pm (repeat)

'Allo 'Allo!

Series 1, Episode 7 - The Dance Of Hitler Youth

The Colonel organises a party in the café, purportedly to celebrate the burning of the Reichstag, but in fact just to get Flick out of his apartment whilst it is broken into.

3:20pm (repeat)

Last Of The Summer Wine

Series 28, Episode 1 - The Second Stag Night Of Doggy Wilkinson

Doggy is disappointed his second stag night might not be as exciting as his first, but help is near.

3:40pm (repeat)

As Time Goes By

Lionel and Jean were young lovers until accidentally losing touch. Years later they meet again by chance and unexpectedly rekindle their romance.

3:50pm
7 min

Shaun The Sheep

Series 4, Episode 12 - Men At Work

When the Farmer discovers he's sprung a leak, he calls the water board to come and fix the problem. The bored flock are thrilled by the opportunity to have some watery fun. When the workmen clock off, the party begins.

4:15pm (repeat)

French Fields

Series 1, Episode 6 - Le Week-End

Finally! The weekend! Hester's delighted to be expecting to welcome Emma, Peter and 'baby' Guy; but William's more concerned with his golf prospects, and the fate of his beloved suede shoes in the hands of Madame Remoleux. If that wasn't enough to contend with, there's a must-attend banquet in the town.

4:20pm (repeat)

Goodnight Sweetheart

Series 2, Episode 1 - Don't Get Around Much Anymore

Six months after time-travelling philanderer Gary turned his back on 1940, Ron persuades him to return for the one big deal which will set them up for life.

4:50pm (repeat)

Second Thoughts

Series 1, Episode 4 - She Who Hesitates

Faith has to sort out her priorities when Bill asks her to celebrate their moving in together by painting the town red.

5pm (repeat)

Keeping Up Appearances

Series 5, Episode 2

Hyacinth is busy trying to find out why she hasn't received her invitation to the mayor's fancy dress ball and she also wants to get to know some important new neighbours.

5pm
30 min

Hank Zipzer

Series 1, Episode 4 - Battle Of The Goblins

Hank finds himself in trouble when he accidentally breaks his and Frankie's science project.

5:20pm (repeat)

George & Mildred

Series 5, Episode 4 - A Driving Ambition

After seeing her in a car in town with another man, George suspects that Mildred may be having an affair and sets out to bring some romance back to their lives.

5:25pm (repeat)

My Parents Are Aliens

Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.

5:40pm (repeat)

Last Of The Summer Wine

Series 22, Episode 5 - Enter The Hawk

Billy Hardcastle finds that having a friend with a powerful pinstriped suit is adventurous enough.

6:20pm (repeat)

Last Of The Summer Wine

Series 22, Episode 6 - Gnome And Away

Howard has a problem delivering a gift.

7pm (repeat)

Only Fools And Horses

Series 2, Episode 6 - It Never Rains....

When Del arranges a holiday in the Benidorm sun, he and Rodney are tempted to leave Grandad at home - but he soon has a change of heart and has an extra bed put in their hotel room. All's well in Spain - until the old man is arrested!

7pm (repeat)

Jam & Jerusalem

A comedy drama about the members of a Women's Guild in a small West Country village called Clatterford.

7:40pm (repeat)

Only Fools And Horses

Series 2, Episode 7 - A Touch Of Glass

A chance meeting with a member of the aristocracy enables Del to impress with his, previously unknown, knowledge of chandelier repairing. He enlists the help of Rodney and Grandad to get them down...

7:40pm (repeat)

Last Of The Summer Wine

Series 28, Episode 1 - The Second Stag Night Of Doggy Wilkinson

Doggy is disappointed his second stag night might not be as exciting as his first, but help is near.

8:20pm (repeat)

dinnerladies

Series 2, Episode 2 - Trouble

Jean's husband leaves her for a dental assistant in south Wales, and her colleagues feel the force of her frustration and anger. Meanwhile, Petula has a more-than-slightly surprising announcement to make.

8:20pm (repeat)

Waiting For God

Series 4, Episode 1

Diana is distraught when she receives a letter informing her that her investments have gone bad, leaving her bankrupt. As she hot-foots it to London to shout at the receivers, Tom discovers his apartment has rising damp.

9pm (repeat)

The Vicar Of Dibley

A selection of episodes from the second and third series of the Dawn French sitcom.

4Music. Copyright: Channel 4 Television Corporation

9pm
50 min version (repeat)

8 Out Of 10 Cats

Series 13, Episode 1

Jimmy Carr once again oversees the disputes and deliberations on the topical events that set the nation's chins wagging. Jon Richardson and Sean Lock are joined by Joe Wilkinson, Ellie Taylor, Natalie Cassidy and Gabby Logan.

9pm
60 min version (repeat)

QI

Series H, Episode 16 - History

With Rob Brydon, Sandi Toksvig and David Mitchell.

9pm (repeat)

Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason

Comedy sequel with more embarrassments and romantic messes for the diary-keeping heroine. Hapless Bridget gets cold feet about her relationship.

9:50pm
50 min version (repeat)

8 Out Of 10 Cats

Topical Channel 4 comedy panel show hosted by Jimmy Carr. The questions are based on survey results and statistics.

10pm (repeat)

Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps

Series 3, Episode 1 - Munch

Janet insists Jonny return Andy's ring, get a job and buy her a proper engagment ring - from Argos. Meanwhile a lad named Munch turns up to work at Gaz's garage claiming to be the half-brother Gaz never knew he had.

10pm
30 min

Doll & Em

Series 1, Episode 1

New comedy series about female friendship between a Hollywood star and the lifetime best friend she hires to be her PA.

10pm
30 min

House Of Fools

Series 1, Episode 6 - The Ghost Affair

Much to Bob's frustration, when Ghost Hunter magazine offers a chimp as a prize to anyone who can provide a genuine photo of a ghost, Vic instantly begins ghost hunting around the flat with Beef and Bosh.

10pm (repeat)

Mock The Week

Series 3, Episode 1

Gina Yashere is Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle's fellow panellist again. Meanwhile Clive Anderson and Russell Howard make their first appearances on Mock the Week. They're on Andy Parsons's side.

10pm (repeat)

Bad Education

Series 2, Episode 1 - Swimming Gala

It's the school's annual swimming gala and Alfie - riding high on love for Miss Gulliver - finds himself engaging in a bet over his class's performance against Pickwell.

10:35pm (repeat)

Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps

Series 3, Episode 2 - Fish

Janet agrees to quit smoking when Jonny tells her he doesn't like it. Meanwhile Louise arranges to meet her secret admirer. It turns out to be an old school mate, David Fish. Thanks to 'Oil of Ulay', David has cured his problem skin and is now rather fit.

10:40pm (repeat)

PhoneShop

Series 2, Episode 1 - Lance Got Game

Lean times have hit the high street, and everyone is feeling the pinch. As Ashley and Jerwayne attempt to make some extra money on the side, Shelley goes on the warpath, and Janine finds herself socialising with the cream of Croydon society.

10:40pm (repeat)

Mock The Week

Series 3, Episode 2

Ed Byrne joins Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle. Jo Brand and Robin Ince are on the right with Andy Parsons.

11pm (repeat)

Jimmy Carr Live: Comedian

Stand-up laughs from leading comedian Jimmy Carr, released as 2007's Comedian DVD.

11pm (repeat)

8 Out Of 10 Cats

Series 17, Episode 1

Jimmy Carr and team captains Jon Richardson and Sean Lock are back for a new series of the topical comedy panel show. The teams are joined by celebrity guests Paul Hollywood, Dawn O'Porter, Joe Wilkinson and Rob Beckett.

11:10pm (repeat)

PhoneShop

Series 2, Episode 2 - It's Training Men

As Ashley and Jerwayne come to terms with the fact that they are getting older, Lance fumes that a training day has been dumped on him at the last minute, and Janine drags Christopher into the hunt for her stalker.

11:20pm (repeat)

Never Mind The Buzzcocks

Series 25, Christmas Special

Guest host John Barrowman is joind by Jason Derulo, Joe Wilkinson, Jason Manford, Helen Skelton, and team captains Phill Jupitus and Noel Fielding for a festive special.

11:30pm (repeat)

The Smell Of Reeves And Mortimer

Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer offer up their unique brand of off-the-wall humour.

11:30pm (repeat)

The Alternative Comedy Experience

Series 1, Episode 6 - Danger Comedians

Tonight's show includes surreal stand-up Tony Law, idiosyncratic comedian Eleanor Tiernan, satirist Andy Zaltzman, German Henning Wehn and backstage chats with Stewart Lee.

11:45pm (repeat)

Paul Chowdhry: What's Happening White People?

TV broadcast of Paul Chowdhry's 2012 stand-up show.

Midnight
60 min version (repeat)

QI

Series H, Episode 16 - History

With Rob Brydon, Sandi Toksvig and David Mitchell.

12:10am (repeat)

The Vicar Of Dibley

A selection of episodes from the second and third series of the Dawn French sitcom.

12:20am (repeat)

Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps

Series 3, Episode 1 - Munch

Janet insists Jonny return Andy's ring, get a job and buy her a proper engagment ring - from Argos. Meanwhile a lad named Munch turns up to work at Gaz's garage claiming to be the half-brother Gaz never knew he had.

12:40am
50 min version (repeat)

8 Out Of 10 Cats

Series 10, Episode 4

With guests Jack Osbourne, Uri Geller, Tim Minchin and Holly Walsh.

12:45am (repeat)

A League Of Their Own

Series 5, Episode 6

This week's line-up includes snooker legend Ronnie O'Sullivan, funnyman Jimmy Carr and telly favourite Christine Bleakley.

1am (repeat)

Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps

Series 3, Episode 2 - Fish

Janet agrees to quit smoking when Jonny tells her he doesn't like it. Meanwhile Louise arranges to meet her secret admirer. It turns out to be an old school mate, David Fish. Thanks to 'Oil of Ulay', David has cured his problem skin and is now rather fit.

1am (repeat)

Mock The Week

Series 3, Episode 1

Gina Yashere is Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle's fellow panellist again. Meanwhile Clive Anderson and Russell Howard make their first appearances on Mock the Week. They're on Andy Parsons's side.

1:20am (repeat)

Comedy Central At The Comedy Store

Stand-up comedy from London's famous club, The Comedy Store.

1:25am (repeat)

Birds Of A Feather

Series 6, Episode 1 - Not In My Back Yard

Sharon, Tracey and Dorien believe they will be living round the corner from royalty, when someone with children called Harry and William, and who is guarded by heavies moves into Chigwell.

1:40am (repeat)

Nixon's The One

Episode 3 - Religion

President Nixon has an awkward chat with TV evangelist Oral Roberts.

1:40am (repeat)

Mock The Week

Series 3, Episode 2

Ed Byrne joins Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle. Jo Brand and Robin Ince are on the right with Andy Parsons.

2:15am (repeat)

The Smell Of Reeves And Mortimer

Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer offer up their unique brand of off-the-wall humour.

2:15am (repeat)

Never Mind The Buzzcocks

Series 25, Christmas Special

Guest host John Barrowman is joind by Jason Derulo, Joe Wilkinson, Jason Manford, Helen Skelton, and team captains Phill Jupitus and Noel Fielding for a festive special.

2:30am (repeat)

The Alternative Comedy Experience

Series 1, Episode 6 - Danger Comedians

Tonight's show includes surreal stand-up Tony Law, idiosyncratic comedian Eleanor Tiernan, satirist Andy Zaltzman, German Henning Wehn and backstage chats with Stewart Lee.

2:30am (repeat)

Bad Education

Series 2, Episode 1 - Swimming Gala

It's the school's annual swimming gala and Alfie - riding high on love for Miss Gulliver - finds himself engaging in a bet over his class's performance against Pickwell.

2:45am (repeat)

The Armstrong & Miller Show

Series 2, Episode 3

The Second World War pilots are vexed that people have been talking about them behind their backs; Dennis Lincoln-Park examines the only surviving panel of a rare tapestry; and the divorced dad offers his teenage son tips on avoiding STDs.

3:15am (repeat)