Television
TV schedule Friday 14th February 2014
6am
(repeat)
French Fields
Series 1, Episode 3 - A Moving ExperienceWilliam's got it all planned out to the last detail - if only the gas man, removal man, electricity man, bed delivery man, estate agent or bed collection man would arrive as planned! Moving out soon becomes a far more hectic and complex experience than they could have possibly imagined. And then Hester manages to mis-pack the passports!
6:15am
(repeat)
Ever Decreasing Circles
Series 1, Episode 5Howard suggests a 'Vicars and Tarts' theme for the annual dance, but in Martin's absence Paul is asked to help out. His array of close friends come in handy, and Martin is not best pleased.
6:45am
(repeat)
Harry Hill's TV Burp
Series 1, Episode 5The floor manager was having his dinner and a bottle of ketchup fell down the back of Harry's beige PVC sofa, which prompts a trip to Holby City Hospital for an operation - on the sofa. Plus, Jamie Oliver shows us how to cook rats.
7:10am
(repeat)
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 1, Episode 5 - The FuneralRené is - supposedly - dead, and so is forced to masquerade as his own twin brother (René 2); he's also forced to spend thousands of francs on a funeral with an empty coffin. Or at least, it would have been empty if it weren't for the anti-tank mines hidden inside...
7:50am
(repeat)
As Time Goes By
Lionel and Jean were young lovers until accidentally losing touch. Years later they meet again by chance and unexpectedly rekindle their romance.
8:30am
(repeat)
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 1, Episode 5 - I Get Along Without You Very WellYvonne decides to spend more time with Gary, now that he's given up his 1940s obsession.
9:10am
(repeat)
Keeping Up Appearances
Series 4, Episode 7 - Let There Be LightRichard shows that he has a way with electricity when he is pressed into service at the church hall.
9:50am
(repeat)
2point4 Children
Series 7, Episode 4 - The Sweet HereafterCollared in the shopping centre by a market researcher, Ben returns home with a plethora of opinion forms and large box of new products to test, including a new chocolate bar called Drool.
10:10am
(repeat)
Sooty
Series 2, Episode 5 - Five Star FishWhen Richard is put in charge of Mr. Slater's five star restaurant, his first customer demands fresh fish. Can Fishermen Sooty and Sweep come to Richard's rescue, or will they catch more than they bargained for? Guest starring Caroline Quentin.
10:30am
(repeat)
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 22, Episode 1 - Getting Barry's GoatTom causes chaos when he leaves something personal in Barry's garage.
11:10am
(repeat)
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 22, Episode 2 - The Art Of The Shorts StoryHoward panics when Pearl asks him why one of his undergarments is missing.
11:50am
(repeat)
Ever Decreasing Circles
Series 1, Episode 5Howard suggests a 'Vicars and Tarts' theme for the annual dance, but in Martin's absence Paul is asked to help out. His array of close friends come in handy, and Martin is not best pleased.
12:25pm
(repeat)
dinnerladies
Series 1, Episode 6 - NightshiftWith Tony too ill to come into work, and his cover so bad-mannered, ill-tempered, horrible and bossy that everyone save Brenda walks out, it's not the best time to have to be open for a rare night shift!
12:25pm
(repeat)
My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
12:50pm
(repeat)
Dani's House
Series 3, Episode 7 - MaxworldMax contrives to lock Dani, Sam and Jack in Dani's bedroom so they can sort out their differences, but it's all just a plot so he can take over the house and turn it into his very own theme park.
1:05pm
(repeat)
Only Fools And Horses
Series 1, Christmas Special - Christmas CrackersIt's anthracite roast potatoes and green stuff all round - Grandad's cooking Christmas dinner! Trouble is, Rodney's in danger of dying of boredom. Then the glittering attractions of the Monte Carlo club beckon...
1:50pm
(repeat)
Only Fools And Horses
Series 2, Episode 2 - Ashes To AshesWhen Trigger's grandmother dies, the Trotters attend the funeral and Del agrees to sell off some of her possessions. These include a couple of precious urns, one of which, on inspection, appears to contain the ashes of Trig's grandfather. They need to dispose of them in a fitting way.
2pm
(repeat)
Birds Of A Feather
Series 5, Episode 11 - An Inspector StaysThe police want to use Tracey and Sharon's home for a surveillance operation.
2:30pm
(repeat)
Harry Hill's TV Burp
Series 1, Episode 5The floor manager was having his dinner and a bottle of ketchup fell down the back of Harry's beige PVC sofa, which prompts a trip to Holby City Hospital for an operation - on the sofa. Plus, Jamie Oliver shows us how to cook rats.
2:40pm
(repeat)
Jam & Jerusalem
A comedy drama about the members of a Women's Guild in a small West Country village called Clatterford.
3pm
(repeat)
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 1, Episode 5 - The FuneralRené is - supposedly - dead, and so is forced to masquerade as his own twin brother (René 2); he's also forced to spend thousands of francs on a funeral with an empty coffin. Or at least, it would have been empty if it weren't for the anti-tank mines hidden inside...
3:15pm
(repeat)
Sooty
Series 2, Episode 6 - The Early NightRichard plans an early night in preparation for Mr Slater's fitness class. But when Sooty's pet mouse escapes, and Sweep loses his favourite bone, his hopes of a good night's sleep look set for disaster.
3:20pm
(repeat)
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 27, Episode 8 - Oh Look! Mitzi's Found Her MummyA ferocious dog won't let Truly, Billy and Alvin enter Clegg's house.
3:40pm
(repeat)
As Time Goes By
Lionel and Jean were young lovers until accidentally losing touch. Years later they meet again by chance and unexpectedly rekindle their romance.
3:50pm7 min
Shaun The Sheep
Series 4, Episode 10 - The SpiderBitzer decides to pamper himself with a relaxing bath while the Farmer is away from the farm. However, his plans are rudely disturbed by a persistent intruder. Will Shaun be able to out-smart the tenacious bug?
4:10pm
(repeat)
French Fields
Series 1, Episode 4 - Où Est La Plumber De Ma Tante?The Fields get off to a slightly raw start in their new French home when Hester wakes up particularly early and discovers that there's no running water. William, meanwhile, experiences a rather rude clash between English and French work cultures.
4:20pm
(repeat)
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 1, Episode 5 - I Get Along Without You Very WellYvonne decides to spend more time with Gary, now that he's given up his 1940s obsession.
4:40pm
(repeat)
Second Thoughts
Series 1, Episode 2 - Match of the DayFaith decides to thank Bill for dinner by inviting him to meet her kids.
5pm
(repeat)
Keeping Up Appearances
Series 4, Episode 7 - Let There Be LightRichard shows that he has a way with electricity when he is pressed into service at the church hall.
5pm30 min
Horrible Histories
2014 Specials - Ridiculous RomanceMixing brand new and previous favourite sketches, we discover what pulled the heartstrings of some of the most famous lovers of days gone by (and the sometimes not-so-lucky objects of their affection).
5:15pm
(repeat)
George & Mildred
Series 5, Episode 2 - In Sickness And In HealthMildred's in hospital with a suspected grumbling appendix, leaving George home alone for a few days. Or he would be, if Jerry didn't drop by!
5:30pm
(repeat)
My Parents Are Aliens
Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.
5:40pm
(repeat)
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 22, Episode 1 - Getting Barry's GoatTom causes chaos when he leaves something personal in Barry's garage.
6:20pm
(repeat)
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 22, Episode 2 - The Art Of The Shorts StoryHoward panics when Pearl asks him why one of his undergarments is missing.
7pm
(repeat)
Only Fools And Horses
Series 2, Episode 1 - The Long Legs Of The LawRodney falls for the charms of a woman police officer but, when he brings her back to the flat, Del is far from pleased as she seems to recognise most of his 'stock' from Scotland Yard records or Police Five!
7pm
(repeat)
Jam & Jerusalem
A comedy drama about the members of a Women's Guild in a small West Country village called Clatterford.
7:40pm
(repeat)
Only Fools And Horses
Series 2, Episode 4 - No Greater LoveRodney has fallen for an older woman whose husband is locked up in prison. With her old man's release imminent, Del fears for Rodney's safety, but he can see that the lad is smitten.
8:20pm
(repeat)
dinnerladies
Series 1, Episode 6 - NightshiftWith Tony too ill to come into work, and his cover so bad-mannered, ill-tempered, horrible and bossy that everyone save Brenda walks out, it's not the best time to have to be open for a rare night shift!
8:30pm30 min
Room 101
Series 3, Episode 4 - Kelly Hoppen, Miles Jupp, Vernon KayDragons' Den star Kelly Hoppen, stand-up Miles Jupp and TV presenter Vernon Kay try to banish sliding doors, limp handshakes and people who litter forever.
9pm
(repeat)
Fawlty Towers
A selection of episodes from the first and second series of the hotel-based sitcom.
9pm
(repeat)
Auf Wiedersehen, Pet
Comedy drama about a group of builders who flee overseas in search of work.
9pm
(repeat)
William And Mary
Series 1, Episode 5William is distraught to learn his mother has suffered a serious stroke, and rushes to the nursing home to see her, arriving just before she dies.
9pm
(repeat)
Mock The Week Looks Back At...
Episode 1 - HealthAnother chance to see Frankie Boyle talking about Mock The Week slash fiction, hear about Dara O Brian's curious exercise regime and see the producer plaintively pleading with Dara through his earpiece.
9pm
(repeat)
Bridget Jones's Diary
Film based on Helen Fielding's novel about an unlucky-in-love Londoner who decides to take control of her life and start a diary.
9pm60 min
Peter Kay: Live & Back On Nights
Episode 2A further look behind-the-scenes on Peter Kay's mammoth tour.
9pm60 min
Stella
Series 3, Episode 4Brenda's Buses make their maiden voyage, but with Brenda and Dai butting heads at every turn, surely it's only a matter of time before the business runs out of gas?
9:30pm
(repeat)
10pm
(repeat)
William And Mary
Series 1, Episode 6William becomes convinced Mary is involved with Reuben, and arrives at her flat hoping to catch them red-handed; only to discover that he's got it completely wrong.
10pm30 min
Alan Davies Après-Ski
Episode 2Alan Davies is joined by Bill Bailey, Katherine Ryan, Else Kåss Furuseth and Aimee Fuller to look at how the Winter Olympic games are going.
10pm
(repeat)
Not Going Out
Series 4, Episode 1 - DrugsAfter a night spent out clubbing, Tim returns to the flat wearing the wrong coat, and convinces Lee to help him return it to its owner.
10pm45 min
The Last Leg
Series 3, Episode 3Topical comedy show with Adam Hills, Josh Widdicombe and Alex Brooker. This week's guest is Warwick Davis.
10pm60 min
Duck Quacks Don't Echo
Series 1, Episode 2Olivia Colman, Rhod Gilbert and The Great British Bake Off judge Paul Hollywood attempt to out-fact each other.
10:35pm50 min
The Graham Norton Show
Series 14, Episode 18 - Matt Damon, Bill Murray, Hugh Bonneville, Paloma FaithMatt Damon, Bill Murray and Hugh Bonneville talk about their new movie, while Paloma Faith joins in the mayhem.
10:40pm
(repeat)
Not Going Out
Series 4, Episode 2 - DebbieWhen a twenty-year old girl turns up on Lee's doorstep and announces that he might be her father, Lee goes into immediate denial. Until, that is, he remembers a one-night stand he had at a party that Tim threw to celebrate the end of his accountancy exams back in the 1980s. Is Lee mature - or rich enough - to be a father?
11pm
(repeat)
A League Of Their Own
Series 5, Episode 5This week, 5,000m world champion Mo Farah, funnyman David Walliams and TV presenter Clare Balding are thrown into the thick of the action.
11:10pm
(repeat)
The League Of Gentlemen
Series 3, Episode 4 - The Medusa TouchB&B proprietors Alvin and Sunny invite their weekend 'Sexplorers' to join them in a voyage of auto-erotic discovery - although Alvin would prefer to be at the garden centre. But who is the mysterious femme fatale in the dwarf conifers and what is the secret of the fearsome Medusa?
11:20pm
(repeat)
Father Ted
Series 2, Episode 5 - A Song For EuropeTed and Dougal plan to enter Eurosong 1996, borrowing the music from a 1970s entry's long-forgotten B-side.
11:20pm
(repeat)
Mock The Week
Series 1, Episode 5John Oliver returns to the programme on Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle's team. Meanwhile David Mitchell and Jo Brand are on Rory Bremner's team this time.
11:30pm
(repeat)
Jason Manford Live
Jason Manford employs his acute observational humour to talk us through the rules of driving, urinal etiquette and the lies that dads tell.
11:35pm
(repeat)
Benidorm
Series 6, Episode 7Crystal Henessy-Vass (guest star Joan Collins) arrives to inspect the Solana, and Joyce fears she'll be given her cards.
11:50pm
(repeat)
The Smell Of Reeves And Mortimer
Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer offer up their unique brand of off-the-wall humour.
11:50pm30 min
Live At The Electric
Series 3, Episode 6Russell Kane is your host for another visit to TV's freshest theatre of comedy. He explains why the British like to be unhappy; Totally Tom try their hand at tour guiding; and Linda the Make-Up Girl inflicts some unconventional beauty techniques upon Marcel Lucont.
11:55pm
(repeat)
Father Ted
Series 2, Episode 6 - The PlagueWith Bishop Brennan on his way in order to talk to Ted about Jack's nude sleepwalking, the parochial house suddenly becomes overrun by rabbits - the one animal Brennan is petrified of...
Midnight
(repeat)
A League Of Their Own
Series 5, Episode 4James Corden welcomes Tottenham and England striker Jermain Defoe and Sky Arts presenter Zoe Ball. Jamie Redknapp, John Bishop, Freddie Flintoff and Jack Whitehall also join in the fun.
12:10am
(repeat)
Birds Of A Feather
Series 5, Episode 11 - An Inspector StaysThe police want to use Tracey and Sharon's home for a surveillance operation.
12:10am
(repeat)
Lee Evans Live From The West End
A one-off live performance from the comic genius, recorded at the Lyric Theatre in 1995.
12:30am
(repeat)
Fawlty Towers
A selection of episodes from the first and second series of the hotel-based sitcom.
12:55am
(repeat)
Not Going Out
Series 4, Episode 1 - DrugsAfter a night spent out clubbing, Tim returns to the flat wearing the wrong coat, and convinces Lee to help him return it to its owner.
1:15am
(repeat)
The Midnight Beast
Series 2, Episode 4 - Going SoloA gig at the Bingo Hall leads to a huge row within the band, at the end of which Ash declares he want to go solo.
1:35am
(repeat)
Not Going Out
Series 4, Episode 2 - DebbieWhen a twenty-year old girl turns up on Lee's doorstep and announces that he might be her father, Lee goes into immediate denial. Until, that is, he remembers a one-night stand he had at a party that Tim threw to celebrate the end of his accountancy exams back in the 1980s. Is Lee mature - or rich enough - to be a father?
1:50am
(repeat)
PhoneShop
Series 3, Episode 4 - #goodtimesAs PhoneShop Sutton attempt to win The Golden Bowl insurance sales award for the sixth year in a row, and Janine attempts to stage the greatest, most elaborate sales evening of all time, all of Lance's energy is going into getting Gregg Wallace to follow him on Twitter.
2am
(repeat)
Uncle
Series 1, Episode 5 - Last Of The Red Hot UnclesWhile Sam's attempting to ditch her dowdy sponsor and Errol's away on a school trip, Andy's trying to break up with Shelly, make up with Gwen, and woo Errol's teacher Melodie too.
2:05am
(repeat)
The Last Leg
Series 3, Episode 2Topical comedy show with Adam Hills, Josh Widdicombe and Alex Brooker. With guest Tinie Tempah.
2:10am
(repeat)
Mock The Week
Series 1, Episode 5John Oliver returns to the programme on Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle's team. Meanwhile David Mitchell and Jo Brand are on Rory Bremner's team this time.
2:15am
(repeat)
The League Of Gentlemen
Series 3, Episode 4 - The Medusa TouchB&B proprietors Alvin and Sunny invite their weekend 'Sexplorers' to join them in a voyage of auto-erotic discovery - although Alvin would prefer to be at the garden centre. But who is the mysterious femme fatale in the dwarf conifers and what is the secret of the fearsome Medusa?
2:15am
(repeat)
Cardinal Burns
Series 1, Episode 5Phil and Jase, two camp paranormal investigators, hunt down spooky goings on at Goswell House; Dustin faces humiliation at a casting for a TV commercial; and tension rises as New Guy installs a hot tub at Office Flirt HQ.
2:40am
(repeat)
Lee Kern's Celebrity Bedlam
Episode 2 - EnvironmentLee Kern looks at the environment by staging a fashion show where the celebrities model clothes that they believe are made from the ultimate recyclable material - human leather!
3:30am
(repeat)
Carpool
Episode 4 - Ross Noble & Stephen K AmosRoss Noble gets a lift to Westfield, and Robert Llewellyn drives Stephen K Amos to a house in Wimbledon.
3:30am
(repeat)
Live At The Electric
Series 3, Episode 6Russell Kane is your host for another visit to TV's freshest theatre of comedy. He explains why the British like to be unhappy; Totally Tom try their hand at tour guiding; and Linda the Make-Up Girl inflicts some unconventional beauty techniques upon Marcel Lucont.
3:55am
(repeat)
Grouchy Young Men
Series 1, Highlights SpecialMore of the best bits from the series as our Grouchies look back grimly on their early years, watching porn, and Brits abroad.