One Foot In The Grave

Victor's brother, Alfred, pays a visit from New Zealand. Pippa and Patrick ask the Meldrews to take care of their plants while they're away on holiday.

Victor picks up his Chinese takeaway meal from a restaurant riddled with prostitutes and notices another customer returning a dish of rice that jumps up and walks around. Worrying what he'll find in his own rice, when he arrives home he cages his boiled rice in a chip pan and prods at it; Patrick looks on, worried and horrified. Victor gives a lecture to a couple of prostitutes who drop litter on his front lawn, but they quickly take offence and plot their rather creative form of revenge.

Victor clears the garden and cuts the grass, which blows through the open window into the lounge, so, taking his gardening equipment, he promptly rakes it up as Patrick walks in to talk to the Meldrews about looking after the house whilst he and Pippa are on holiday. Seeing Victor raking grass from the floor makes him a bit worried about leaving Victor in charge of their house. Finally, one of the prostitutes' partners puts the hosepipe in Patrick's letterbox by mistake when plotting revenge on Victor, as he's watched him enter the house to water the plants. Needless to say, Patrick is fuming when he returns to a drenched house!