Joe Tracini & "Mick" front Channel 4 film Me And The Voice In My Head
- Joe Tracini will appear as himself and Mick, his destructive internal monologue, in a new documentary about his struggles with borderline personality disorder
- In Me And The Voice In My Head, Tracini speaks to BPD experts, his father Joe Pasquale and other loved ones, as he prepares to make a career comeback in stand-up
- The stand-up show is "about depression, suicide, self-harm, addiction, birthdays, funerals, good liars, bad ideas and a ganglord that forced me to hold a raw chicken. But it's mostly about hope"
Comic actor Joe Tracini has filmed a Channel 4 documentary about his borderline personality disorder, how it made him feel suicidal and prevented him from performing, British Comedy Guide can exclusively reveal.
Airing soon, the "genre-busting" Me And The Voice In My Head mixes personal insight into Tracini's experience with scripted comedy sequences, as he battles a history of drug addiction and past traumas and dreams of performing stand-up that will reignite his career on stage, with a show "about depression, suicide, self-harm, addiction, birthdays, funerals, good liars, bad ideas and a ganglord that forced me to hold a raw chicken. But it's mostly about hope."
In the one-hour film, Tracini introduces viewers to Mick, the constant voice in his head. The documentary aims to show how Mick feeds the comic negative thoughts and encourages him to hurt himself. Tracini also plays Mick, appearing on screen alongside his "real" self.
BPD affects around 2% of the population. It severely impacts upon how a person thinks and feels about themselves and others, leading to intense, unstable emotions, chronic insecurity and intrusive thoughts, as Tracini has striven to reflect in his social media content.
"Most films about mental illness are, ironically, depressing" Tracini told BCG. "I'm a lot of things, but serious is rarely one of them. I think we can all agree that it's not the easiest time to be alive, and with things getting worse faster than I can lower my standards, I'm very grateful to Channel 4 and Hungry Bear Media for letting me tell my story my way."
In the course of the film, Tracini speaks to his family and loved ones, including his father, comedian Joe Pasquale, and experts in BPD, in order to gain more understanding into his condition and to try to make his life more liveable. But Mick is never far away.
Best known for his viral, leotard-clad spoof dance videos during the coronavirus pandemic and starring in the soap opera Hollyoaks between 2011 and 2018, Tracini's comedy roles include the children's show My Spy Family and teen sitcom Coming Of Age, as well as The Great Outdoors, Mr Blue Sky and Robert Popper's I Hate You. He also played Patsy in a UK tour of Spamalot, alongside Pasquale as King Arthur.
Tracini first revealed his BPD diagnosis and addiction issues on X, then known as Twitter, in 2019. In 2022 he published the memoir Ten Things I Hate About Me, reflecting upon the statistics that 15% of people with BPD complete the act of suicide and 40% try, explaining that he wrote the book to save his own life.
Produced and directed by comedy helmer Tommy Forbes (Joe Lycett Vs..., Junior Taskmaster) and documentary-maker Tom Green (The World's Most Expensive Trainers; The Man With A Penis On His Arm), Me And The Voice In My Head was executive produced by Dan Baldwin (Michael McIntyre's Big Show, Celebrity Juice) for Hungry Bear Media (The National Comedy Awards, Alan Carr's Happy Hour). It was commissioned by Tim Hancock, commissioning editor at Channel 4.
"I am hugely grateful to Joe for allowing us into his life and mind for this powerful, sensitive and at times very funny programme" said Hancock. "It's a unique mix of comedy and brutal authenticity, which all comes together to create a clear portrait of what it is to live with this tough condition."
Baldwin added: "Making this documentary with the phenomenally talented Joe Tracini was a huge highlight for us all. It is a tough, heart-wrenching, enlightening, terrifying and brilliantly funny film. In my opinion, it deserves to win everything - hearts, minds and awards."