DI Sleet interview
With Murder In Successville back on BBC Three, we managed to get hold of the show's central man - DI Sleet - to find out more:
Hi DI Sleet. How are you this week?
I'm doing good, without doing great. I've just bought a new pair of shoes, my first new pair in over thirty years. An interesting fact about me is I've been a size twelve since I was a mere ten year-old lad. Got my first pair of kicks from my father before he was shot, guess I've held on to them for all these years because I wasn't ready to say goodbye.
I've changed the laces countless times, the sole a few times too but the sweet leather upper has remained the same. Throwing those shoes out was the biggest thing I've done, it was me saying "goodbye pop, I'm ready walk on my own again, miss ya mate."
And how is life at home? Do you fit the mould of being a detective who lives alone and drinks too much?
I've tried over the years to drink too much and never managed it. Is it even possible? Ever since my wife kicked me out for a new beau, I've lived in my car. It's a decent thinking space.
Sometimes I think too much. I think of things I could have done differently, choices I've made, and that twelve letter across word that has outwitted me for the last 18 months. I will find it you swine!
Where's my cherry brandy?
What can we expect from the second series of Murder In Successville?
Successville isn't a series - it's my god damn life. You see a small chunk of that. You catch the newbies - the fresh new faces who join me to learn something, to try and get answers, to find the truth. Let me FRIGGING tell you: I've looked and there ain't no truth, there's just bodies and crime and that's the game!
You get to work with lots of rookie cops. Does it annoy you that you have to spend so much of your career looking after trainees?
I've spent an infinite amount of time pacing these streets. My currency is wisdom and it's my job to pass that on, but never for free. It may be a hug from Mark Wright or a sweet song from Chris Kamara or a complicated hand shake from Emma Bunton - everyone pays at the door to enter this mind!
Which sidekick have you most enjoyed spending time with?
I enjoy them all - they make me feel human for a little while. They make me feel wanted. There's a bit of all my rookies inside of me. Some of them reside in my heart, they make me smile. Others live in my gut, like an ulcer or some bad tacos, they will be the death of me.
What do you think of your boss, Gordon Ramsay?
He's a good man, never afraid to express himself. A few years back we went on a camping trip at Easter. Just the two of us, we rode horses, we made sand castles and we drank moonshine. I got to know the man behind the screaming and the tears. Now when he hits me or tells me I'm fat or stupid, I think of the man sitting by a camp fire toasting marshmallows and singing Amazing Grace and it takes the pain away.
Some would say that the murder rate in your city is astronomically high, and the police should be doing a better job of preventing all this death. How would you respond to these critics?
I'd say "get a sense of perspective before I come down your throat like hot soup!"
If there were no murders there'd be no Murder Cops, I'd be out of a job!
Successville is full of famous people. If you could arrange a dinner party, who would you invite?
Me, myself and I. I'm too long in the tooth to worry about organising a dinner party and inviting people who might never come. As a naive teenager I put together a "Sweet 16" to celebrate me becoming a man. I invited everyone in town, every man woman and child. Do you know how many people turned up? One, a local wino, with no shoes, doused in his own urine. We sat up and chatted life, he held me when I cried, and told me "people will always let you down, be guarded, booze is your only friend."
If the city allowed a day where murder is legal, who would you kill?
Damn, you've never been to Successville. If you carry a badge and gun, murder is legal.
Fingers crossed the BBC return to document your work further, in a third series. If they do, who would be your ideal sidekick next time?
I learnt one thing about ideals, there ain't no such thing, like singing canaries or dancing elephants. There ain't an ideal partner - just some wise jack with dreams.
If one day the BBC choose to come back and document my life I'll put up the welcome mat the same way I always do. No matter who you are or where you are from, if you head through those doors with ambitions of catching a killer in Successville you're a friend of mine and a hero in the making.
BCG would like to thank Tom Davis for helping us contact DI Sleet.
The brand new series of 'Murder In Successville' is available now via www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree