Have I Got News For You

Guest host Steph McGovern is joined by TV personality Carol Vorderman and comedian Nabil Abdulrashid.

Prime Minister Rishi Sunak travelled to Japan this week for the 2023 G7 Summit, but the trip was overshadowed by new accusations of impropriety within the Tory party, as allegations of further COVID breaches came to the fore for Boris Johnson, and Home Secretary Suella Braverman was accused of breaking ministerial code, by attempting to arrange a private one-to-one speed awareness course, in order to spare her blushes.

Carol Vorderman and the panel got stuck straight into this week's latest headaches for Prime Minister Sunak:

"What a shower ay? An absolute shower. I can't believe they're our government. Boris Johnson is like a dose of diarrhoea that keeps on giving, is he not? Every single time you switch on the news he's still there - how does this happen?" asked Vorderman.

"It's not been a good week for the Government and poor old Rishi Sunak... I mean, not 'poor'... but whenever he thinks things are getting slightly better it all blows up again. Suella Braverman was done for speeding," said Ian Hislop.

"Yes, this is the news that Suella Braverman is off the hook for speeding but Boris Johnson might be back on it again for COVID breaches. Although I don't think I want to see Boris's COVID breaches," joked host Steph McGovern.

"I am very interested in this story because everyone says 'it doesn't matter' and 'so what, it was a speeding thing'... but Braverman was Attorney General, the person who's in charge of the law... and she asked her civil servants if she could have a one-to-one speed awareness course, on the grounds that she's extremely well known and it would be embarrassing. I have to say, I did a speed awareness course... and it was unbelievably embarrassing! It's so you don't do it again..." Hislop said.

"I think we should appreciate Suella Braverman while she's here. Yes she broke the law as a lawmaker, but I think lawmakers should be allowed to break the law. Every job has its perks!" joked comedian Nabil Abdulrashid, continuing, "I think when a children's animation movie about the Tories comes out, she'll make the perfect villain. We'll call it '101 Allegations'."

"That's fair enough but I think 'allegations' suggests she's not guilty... so it's '101 Damnations'," laughed Hislop.

"This is the news that Boris Johnson may have broken the rules during lockdown by hosting a series of parties at Chequers, which he insists can't be true, as he was too busy hosting parties at Downing Street," joked McGovern, continuing, "After being caught speeding, Suella Braverman has been fined and was given three points. When he became Prime Minister, Rishi Sunak insisted his government would be based on 'integrity, professionalism and accountability'. Three points Suella hasn't got," joked McGovern.

Later in the episode, the panel turned their attention to the news this week that Phillip Schofield would no longer be presenting ITV's daytime show This Morning, following weeks of speculation about a souring of his off-air relationship with co-host Holly Willoughby.

"I found this story quite difficult to follow since I didn't know who they were..." laughed Hislop.

"Or indeed that there was such a thing as daytime TV..." Merton quipped at Hislop.

"I suppose it's always going to be really difficult, isn't it? You know, when there's a bitter rift between a much-loved, long-running TV duo," said McGovern, cheekily glancing at Hislop and Merton.

"Yes, but we don't sit next to each other," quipped Merton.

"What's the secret to your success as a pair?" asked McGovern.

"We don't talk to each other outside of recording," Merton joked.

"This is the news that Phillip Schofield has stepped down from his co-presenting role on This Morning. Holly and Phil have also received a nomination in this year's National Television Awards... presumably for 'Best Drama'," joked McGovern, continuing, "Despite leaving This Morning, Philip has stated that he will continue to present Dancing On Ice alongside Holly Willoughby, and they'll save on the budget because the rink is going to be frozen just by the atmosphere between them."