Blankety Blank

Let's hope Blankety Blank doesn't get Keith Lemon

The best possible thing that could happen to Blankety Blank now is if someone like Paddy McGuinness took over and oversaw a ho-hum photocopy of the original show. But this is ITV. We cannot rule out the horrible prospect of Keith Lemon's Blankety Blank. Look at Through the Keyhole, once a respected if smug BBC One series that ITV snapped up and transformed into a witless totem to endless, tortuous, shrieking, pointless, Lambrini-drinking, grunting, cheapskate, empty-calorie Keith Lemon muck. If ITV has the power to do that to Through the Keyhole, imagine what a mess it would make of Blankety Blank.

There is a new series of Blankety Blank (BBC1), if you fancy that. This economical series is bomb-proof as it leans confidently on the personality of the presenter - Terry Wogan, Les Dawson and now Lily Savage. When Spike Milligan was on the Blankety Blank panel, he seemed out of place because he instinctively gave witty answers. Too late he realised that what was needed was the bleeding obvious.

There has been much talk this week about The Times being a GBI (Great British Institution). Well, so is Panorama and so, perversely, is Blankety Blank (BBC1), unarguably the most fatuous show on British television, and, as such, eligible for institutional status. The only consolation to be derived from this on-going debacle is the thought that a TV programme can never be worse than its viewers; for the more stupid it is, the more stupid they are to watch it.

Back in Britain, it is almost a relief to turn on Blankety Blank (BBC1), hosted by Terry Wogan. True, this is an American format, which has merely been transplanted like a tuft of hair. But compared with an American quiz show host, Terry Wogan is Doctor Johnson. He is capable of the occasional spontaneous remark. It is not a very memorable occasional spontaneous remark, but he is capable of it.