Schedule Monday 14th September 2020

Timmy Time

It is time to spring-clean the nursery, but Timmy wants to go outside and play, so he rushes his chores.

Relativity

Ian brings home new girlfriend Chloe. His mum Margaret desperately hopes she is the one, dad Ken can't wait to try out his shampoo joke - again, while sister Jane, brother-in-law Pete and their three teen children try to get to the bottom of just what the attractive, intelligent, witty 30-something Chloe sees in serial dater and under employed 40-plus actor, Ian.

The Story Of... Only Fools & Horses

Deals And Misdemeanours explores all the hooky deals and bent gear the Trotters have 'knocked out' in and around the markets stalls of Peckham, which would always land Del and Rodney in some sort of trouble.

Shaun The Sheep

While preparing for bed, the farmer manages to lock himself out of the house and is stuck outside in his pyjamas. He decides to spend the night in the barn but his incessant snoring drives the flock mad. Shaun concocts a plan to return him to his bed without waking him up.

Danger Mouse

Brunel, the crazed time-travelling Victorian gentlechimp, is back and determined to change history so Danger Mouse and Penfold never meet.

Go Jetters

A race between Xuli, Lars and Glitch gets serious when a tornado hits the Academy Island.

The Museum Of Curiosity

Professor of Ignorance John Lloyd and the Museum's brand new curator Alice Levine are joined by writer and presenter Danny Wallace, broadcaster and tech expert Georgia Lewis Anderson, and Agatha Christie's great-grandson and CEO of Agatha Christie Ltd, James Prichard.

Bitz & Bob

Bitz has created a super strawberry, dreamy creamy, nicely icely, bake-a-licious cake that is so tasty Bob suggests she makes more so she can sell them to the whole world.

Chef!

Gareth Blackstock has been forced to sell his restaurant. After he misses a marriage counselling appointment, Janice walks out and begins divorce proceedings. Gareth hopes to win her back, but can he leave Le Chateau Anglais?

Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing

The third series of Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing begins with Paul and Bob taking a trip to the River Tweed in Scotland, where they continue their quest to catch a salmon.

I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again

Greyhounds in conversation and a trip to the South Pole.

The Secret Life Of Rosewood Avenue

Episode 1, Moving In: A hapless vicar discovers life behind the net curtains of suburbia is not what he expected.

Justin's House

Robert is being judged for a special robot award but he is too nervous to pass all the tests, so Justin decides to take the tests for him.

Only Fools And Horses

After a mysterious call from the health inspector, the local Chinese restaurant employ the Trotters to renovate their kitchens. Trigger supplies the paint but neglects to tell them exactly where he got it from.

It's Great To Be Young!

John Mills stars as a well-loved teacher in this gentle musical comedy portraying life in the 1950s British classroom and the school jazz band.

Mr Bean

Bean tracks down the men responsible for kidnapping his teddy - only to find he is not their only captive!

Bless This House

Sid's got a problem. His beloved birthday present from the rest of the family, a plush faux-fur coat, is giving him extreme allergic reactions whenever he puts it on. How can he tell Jean or the kids without upsetting them?

Mr Bean

Mr Bean takes his teddy to the cinema but has trouble finding a parking space.

Timmy Time

After a game of football, muddy Timmy is determined not to have a bath.

Hi-De-Hi!

Spike Dixon is in love. Unfortunately his prospective father-in-law insists that Spike gives up showbusiness and comes into his lucrative butchery empire.

Twirlywoos

The Box brings them a rainy cloud, which makes the Boat wet too!

Bless This House

The Abbott family breakfast appears to have turned into Songs Of Praise when Sally comes scrounging for food to give to a tramp she and Mike have befriended in Shepherd's Bush. Sid is less than enthusiastic, but at least they've not brought 'Wally' home with them!

Horrible Histories

Marking International Women's Day, there are ancient wonder women, a Spartan queen on Historical Love Island and the Tudor Queens sing!

Minder

Arthur's latest enterprise involves a Karaoke machine and his favourite ventriloquist act from the old days - Professor Pickford and Mystic Mickey.

Last Of The Summer Wine

Marina's apparent fascination with men in uniform forces Howard to take drastic steps.

George & Mildred

As if Mildred wasn't already sick enough of having to just 'make do and mend', the marital bed promptly gives way after a good few decades' service. Unfortunately, George is on a Higher Purchase blacklist.

Sooty

Sooty, Sweep and Soo are desperate to break a world record for judge Boris McSquirter, will Sooty's giant brick tower win the day, or will Sweep become the tallest dog in the world? Guest starring Richard Arnold.

Diddy TV

Christmas is coming and Diddy TV presents its very own festive line-up. Panel Beaters Christmas special, Kirsty Allsort's perfect Christmas and a santa sack full of adverts!

Sunstruck

Family comedy about a Welsh teacher who emigrates to Australia and quickly discovers life down under isn't everything he was promised.

Last Of The Summer Wine

When Pearl confiscates Howard's bike, Foggy suggests that what he needs is one which can be easily concealed or, better still, doesn't look like a bicycle.

Shaun The Sheep

It's a beautiful day and Shaun, Bitzer and Timmy are enjoying a picnic, when an unexpected guest arrives and spoils the peace. Forced into hiding the trio find ways to entertain themselves, until they have to brave up and face their fear.

Shaun The Sheep

The flock hear the enticing tunes of an ice cream van approaching and quickly hatch a plan to divert it into their field. While the driver seeks help, the flock have great fun with an endless supply of ice cream - but will they be able to cover their tracks before they're discovered?

Dennis & Gnasher Unleashed!

Pieface's all time hero, Cherry Bakewell, is coming to Beanotown to judge the annual bake-off.

Dennis & Gnasher Unleashed!

Dennis accidentally clones himself and uses his exact opposite clone to do all his chores and abide by the rules at school. All is going to plan until Walter realises what has happened and unleashes a clone cat army on the den!

Only Fools And Horses

With the bankruptcy court ordering the family home in Nelson Mandela house to be auctioned, the Trotters' financial nightmare is fast approaching meltdown.

Combined with Cassandra about to give birth at anytime, Marlene's mysterious disappearance and Trigger behaving even more bizarrely than usual, its little wonder that no one is sleeping soundly in Peckham.

I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again

Greyhounds in conversation and a trip to the South Pole.

Waffle The Wonder Dog

Waffle discovers he has a talent for painting Mrs Hobbs's cat, George, and decides to share his work with her as a way to get in her good books.

Timmy Time

Timmy is enthralled by Mittens's new music box, which has a splendid ballerina on top.

The Secret Life Of Rosewood Avenue

Episode 1, Moving In: A hapless vicar discovers life behind the net curtains of suburbia is not what he expected.

2point4 Children

Ben's father drops into town, with his young Thai wife. However, neither Ben nor Tina were aware of her existence, and the news isn't helped to go down by Frank's attitude.

Saluting Dad's Army

Alexander Armstrong continues this 50th anniversary celebration of Dad's Army by looking at the heyday of the show. He meets Dad's Army vicar Frank Williams, explores the impact of the show on the lives of its stars and we hear from Hugh Dennis, Jon Culshaw and other comedy stars of today who grew up loving Dad's Army.

The Rubbish World Of Dave Spud

George finds a computer called Val but Val has a mind of her own. Soon she's set about uploading embarrassing videos to social media.

The Rubbish World Of Dave Spud

When Dave needs a new coat, Gran kindly suggests she knows a good one by the carpark bin. Dave promptly gets trapped inside the coat and discovers it's past.

Hi-De-Hi!

Spike Dixon is in love. Unfortunately his prospective father-in-law insists that Spike gives up showbusiness and comes into his lucrative butchery empire.

Danger Mouse

This episode sees the return of the villainous vegetarian vampire Count Duckula, who is determined to take over the world with a chorus-line of formidable dancing vegetables...

Dennis & Gnasher Unleashed!

Dennis and the gang are fed up with dinner lady Olive's completely inedible school dinners. In their mission to 'drop the slop', they discover a poster of her past career as a singer. The gang ask her to join The Dinmakers - hoping she'll swap a life in the kitchen for fame. However, after unleashing Olive's inner diva, their new mission is how to get Olive back into the kitchen!

Only Fools And Horses

After a mysterious call from the health inspector, the local Chinese restaurant employ the Trotters to renovate their kitchens. Trigger supplies the paint but neglects to tell them exactly where he got it from.

Scream Street

Otto's latest money-making scheme consists of stealing zombie body parts and selling them back. It ends up with him and the gang being mobbed by angry zombies. Can they find a way to escape and stop the zombies from tearing them all limb from limb?

Minder

Arthur starts a catering business.

Dad's Army

Jones is worried that Mrs. Fox is falling in love with the town clerk, Mr. Gordon, so he asks Captain Mainwaring if he can help. Meanwhile, Hodges and Gordon are casting for the role of Lady Godiva in the town parade.

Mr Bean

Bean tracks down the men responsible for kidnapping his teddy - only to find he is not their only captive!

The Passionate Stranger

When an Italian chauffeur is taken on by a married couple, the novelist wife writes him into her new book. He finds the manuscript and, believing she's in love with him, tries to woo her.

Mr Bean

Mr Bean takes his teddy to the cinema but has trouble finding a parking space.

Danny & Mick

Danny and Mick have got everything ready for the new spa... except for the spa. Oops!

Hi-De-Hi!

Spike Dixon is in love. Unfortunately his prospective father-in-law insists that Spike gives up showbusiness and comes into his lucrative butchery empire.

Relativity

Ian brings home new girlfriend Chloe. His mum Margaret desperately hopes she is the one, dad Ken can't wait to try out his shampoo joke - again, while sister Jane, brother-in-law Pete and their three teen children try to get to the bottom of just what the attractive, intelligent, witty 30-something Chloe sees in serial dater and under employed 40-plus actor, Ian.

Waffle The Wonder Dog

Waffle learns that reading can be just as much fun as noisy maze games.

Last Of The Summer Wine

Marina's apparent fascination with men in uniform forces Howard to take drastic steps.

Fresh Fields

Hester's father turns up at the house, determined to win back her mother. William, meanwhile, is getting ready to go on a fishing trip - and is most unamused when Hester suddenly wants to join him.

The Museum Of Curiosity

Professor of Ignorance John Lloyd and the Museum's brand new curator Alice Levine are joined by writer and presenter Danny Wallace, broadcaster and tech expert Georgia Lewis Anderson, and Agatha Christie's great-grandson and CEO of Agatha Christie Ltd, James Prichard.

Waiting For God

Diana's developing and inspecting the photos from her helicopter trip with Tom. Meanwhile, local politician Mr Ferguson is hoping to secure the block wrinkly vote in the upcoming elections, and Geoffrey's planning a move that's a little too close for Tom's comfort.

Last Of The Summer Wine

When Pearl confiscates Howard's bike, Foggy suggests that what he needs is one which can be easily concealed or, better still, doesn't look like a bicycle.

Taskmaster

Celebs leave their dignity at the door as dastardly Mr Gilbert - aka Greg Davies - sets them some truly bizarre tasks, including building an egg tower.

Miss Robin Hood

Comedy about a writer who finds himself roped into a spot of industrial theft due to the adventures in his childrens' stories.

Ankle Tag

Gruff's mum visits - but how will she respond to the news that her ex-husband Bob is out of prison?

'Allo 'Allo!

René is packing, once again, to elope with Yvette and the nicked gold to Switzerland - but before he goes, there's the small matter of a missing Enigma machine to deal with.

Dad's Army

Jones is worried that Mrs. Fox is falling in love with the town clerk, Mr. Gordon, so he asks Captain Mainwaring if he can help. Meanwhile, Hodges and Gordon are casting for the role of Lady Godiva in the town parade.

Horrible Histories

The Puritans set sail, Queen Elizabeth I loses a colony, and the Founding Fathers sing!

The Rubbish World Of Dave Spud

It's the biggest sporting event in Grimsby - the bog roll roll. All Dave has to do is chase the bog roll down the hill and catch it.

Dara O Briain's Go 8 Bit

Josh Widdicombe and scientist Dr Maggie Aderin-Pocock join the regulars to play five video games: Defender, Love You To Bits, Football Manager 2017, Battlezone VR and special endgame Cock Oh Van in a bid to become this week's Go 8 Bit Champions.

I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again

Greyhounds in conversation and a trip to the South Pole.

The Rubbish World Of Dave Spud

The Spuds don't care about a carbon footprint, since George has come home with a haul of free electronics that they all want to test out.

Last Of The Summer Wine

Compo is reminded of a boisterous game he used to play at school, a game far too rough for Clegg to remember. Truly, meanwhile, has a lawnmower on his mind.

Dad's Army

There is good news for the platoon: they are to welcome a French General and Mainwaring is to get a staff car - a Rolls-Royce, no less. It is decided to have the car camouflage-painted.

The Secret Life Of Rosewood Avenue

Episode 1, Moving In: A hapless vicar discovers life behind the net curtains of suburbia is not what he expected.

Millie Inbetween

It is Millie and Lauren's first Christmas since the separation, and for Millie it is the chance for a fresh start.

Porridge

It's New Year's Day, and Fletch enters Slade Prison, along with two fellow prisoners, returning resident Heslop and new boy Godber. Fletch introduces Godber to the ways of survival inside - "little victories" over the warders and other staff - although his scheming doesn't quite have the desired effect.

Jon Richardson: Ultimate Worrier

Jon is joined by Josh Widdicombe and Suzi Ruffell to address worries around the home - are people sleeping badly? Is it possible to be bored? Are people loading their dishwashers incorrectly? They won't solve anything, but they will rank them according to severity in a nice tiered system which helps Jon's nerves.

Would I Lie To You?

With Romesh Ranganathan, Martin Kemp, Mel Giedroyc and David Haye.

Porridge

Gambling fever has hit Slade - subjects include the number of bricks in a cell, and the number of eggs laid by the hens on the prison farm. Fletch has organised a big game in a secret location, but will anyone actually win?

Comedy Game Night

Joining Liza in her larger than life living room are Ellie Taylor, Luisa Omielan, Sophie Duker, Richard Blackwood, Dev Griffin and John Thomson.

Hypothetical

Josh Widdicombe and James Acaster are joined by Tom Allen, Felicity Ward, Sue Perkins and Alex Brooker.

Only Fools And Horses

After a mysterious call from the health inspector, the local Chinese restaurant employ the Trotters to renovate their kitchens. Trigger supplies the paint but neglects to tell them exactly where he got it from.

The Office

David Brent is informed by Head Office that his Slough branch of Wernham Hogg paper merchants might be closed down. David's deep rooted need to be popular triumphs over realism and he immediately promises the staff there will be no redundancies.

The Ricky Gervais Show

Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant and Karl Pilkington cover a range of pointless topics, including the Top 50 "Freaks of All Time", famous sayings and a fire fighting monkey.

Mock The Week

Angela Barnes, Ed Byrne, Milton Jones, Nish Kumar and Romesh Ranganathan are the guests this week.

Have I Got News For You

Ian and Paul return for another look at the headlines. Alexander Armstrong hosts, with guests Naga Munchetty and Josh Widdicombe.

The Museum Of Curiosity

Professor of Ignorance John Lloyd and the Museum's brand new curator Alice Levine are joined by writer and presenter Danny Wallace, broadcaster and tech expert Georgia Lewis Anderson, and Agatha Christie's great-grandson and CEO of Agatha Christie Ltd, James Prichard.

The Ricky Gervais Show

Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant and Karl Pilkington cover a range of pointless topics including body parts, prostate exams, and the phrase "a stitch in time saves nine".

Tom Wrigglesworth's Hang Ups

When Tom phones home we find out why he hates celebrations, why his mum can't stop organising them and why his father needs an electric whisk.

Sara Pascoe Vs Monogamy

Pilot from Sara Pascoe in which she discusses the topic of monogamy through scripted scenes.

The Office

David hires Donna, his lodger and the daughter of his best friend. While showing her round the office he discovers a doctored pornographic image of himself. Gareth, due to his covert operations skills, is told to catch the culprit.

Porridge

A selection of episodes from the third series of the prison-based sitcom.

8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown

Johnny Vegas and Rhod Gilbert face off against Joe Wilkinson and Roisin Conaty. Tom Allen is in with Susie Dent, and Rachel Riley is in charge of the letters and numbers.

Big Zuu's Big Eats

Big Zuu and the boys are going international - flying all the way to the Isle of Man to cook the perfect meal for comedian Josh Widdicombe.

The News Quiz

Andy Zaltzman hosts the satirical quiz in front of a virtual audience, with guests Hugo Rifkind, Athena Kugblenu, Angela Barnes and Alun Cochrane.

Smack The Pony

Always stretch properly before entering the swimming pool. Do people walk dogs or dogs walk people? And, really, what should you expect when you visit someone's living room for some spiritual healing?

Brassed Off

A colliery brass band enter a competition at the Royal Albert Hall, fearful about their future. Stars Pete Postlethwaite and Ewan McGregor.

Hut 33

It's 1942, the war is not going well, and the codebreakers of Bletchley Park are under even more pressure than before.

Have I Got News For You

Comedian Rhod Gilbert guest presents. Fellow comedian Tom Allen & broadcaster Emma Barnett appear as panellists alongside team captains Ian Hislop & Paul Merton.

Have I Got News For You

Steph McGovern returns as guest presenter of Have I Got News For You for the series' third episode. Joining Ian Hislop and Paul Merton as panellists are journalist Ash Sarkar and comedian Josh Widdicombe.

Smack The Pony

Be careful who you let use the photocopier before you. There's a graphic response to the question, do you like my outfit? And two women try to enjoy the great outdoors without bumping into anyone.

Peep Show

Sophie tells Mark that her and Geoff are moving in together and that he thinks her and Mark should see less of each other.

Minder

Arthur starts a catering business.

Jon Richardson: Ultimate Worrier

Jon Richardson and guests Josh Widdicombe, John Robins and Holly Walsh discuss, categorise and rank worries to do with People - are greetings getting out of hand? Are robots doing all our thinking? And how is Josh offending so many people over text?

Alan Carr Yap, Yap, Yap!

TV edit of Alan Carr's 2015-released live show.

The Office

David Brent is informed by Head Office that his Slough branch of Wernham Hogg paper merchants might be closed down. David's deep rooted need to be popular triumphs over realism and he immediately promises the staff there will be no redundancies.

Taskmaster

One of the secrets to the Taskmaster's successful reign of tyranny is that he's ruthlessly unpredictable which means things can change very, very quickly in this game. Alex Horne takes scrupulous notes as Paul Sinha squats in a telephone box and Iain Stirling stakes his claim for the Scottish national football team.

The Office

David hires Donna, his lodger and the daughter of his best friend. While showing her round the office he discovers a doctored pornographic image of himself. Gareth, due to his covert operations skills, is told to catch the culprit.

Smack The Pony

Always stretch properly before entering the swimming pool. Do people walk dogs or dogs walk people? And, really, what should you expect when you visit someone's living room for some spiritual healing?

Smack The Pony

Be careful who you let use the photocopier before you. There's a graphic response to the question, do you like my outfit? And two women try to enjoy the great outdoors without bumping into anyone.

Dara O Briain's Go 8 Bit

Comedian Robert Webb and broadcaster Gemma Cairney join host Dara O Briain, team captains Steve McNeil and Sam Pamphilon and resident gaming expert Ellie Gibson. Taking on the joystick challenge they compete against each other in 1942, Jetpac, Angry Birds, Overcooked and Show Me The Monet.

Bless This House

Sid's initially highly unamused when Mike and Sally decide to earn a little extra cash by opening up a pet-sitting business. However, when the opportunity for a few extra pounds comes his way...

Peep Show

Sophie tells Mark that her and Geoff are moving in together and that he thinks her and Mark should see less of each other.

Relativity

Ian brings home new girlfriend Chloe. His mum Margaret desperately hopes she is the one, dad Ken can't wait to try out his shampoo joke - again, while sister Jane, brother-in-law Pete and their three teen children try to get to the bottom of just what the attractive, intelligent, witty 30-something Chloe sees in serial dater and under employed 40-plus actor, Ian.

The Museum Of Curiosity

Professor of Ignorance John Lloyd and the Museum's brand new curator Alice Levine are joined by writer and presenter Danny Wallace, broadcaster and tech expert Georgia Lewis Anderson, and Agatha Christie's great-grandson and CEO of Agatha Christie Ltd, James Prichard.