Schedule Wednesday 12th March 2014
Waiting For God
Series 2, Episode 4After a string of pearls, a host of crucifixes, and numerous other high-value items disappear from Betty's room, Harvey threatens to call the police in to investigate the apparent crimewave. It's down to Tom Holmes to solve this one.
Home To Roost
Series 1, Episode 3 - All You Need Is LoveA girlfriend is introduced in the home. Naturally, Henry objects to his son's choice, but it is Mrs T. who finds the incriminating evidence in Matthew's bedroom.
Ever Decreasing Circles
Series 4, Episode 5A dispute with a farmer over the right to use a public footpath backfires on Martin as he campaigns to liberate footpaths for the use of all the public. He finds that the same footpath runs through his back garden as well...
Steptoe And Son
Series 7, Episode 1 - Men Of LettersAlbert Steptoe and his son Harold run a rag and bone business. Harold wants to move on in the world and leave home but his plans are always thwarted.
An Actor's Life For Me
Series 1, Episode 2 - I Can Do ThatRobert gets a role as a chauffeur, except he can't drive.
Desmond's
Series 3, Episode 5 - Relative StrangersPorkpie is earning a little pin money by helping out at the barber shop and the first customer he meets turns out to be his long lost daughter Denise, now a medical student, who hasn't seen her father for twenty years.
Thanks A Lot, Milton Jones!
Series 1, Episode 3 - SmugglersThe local seafarers' pub starts serving only coffee. Who better than Milton to sort it out?
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 4, Episode 6 - The Jet Propelled Mother-In-LawRené is arrested by the Colonel; in exchange for his release, he agrees to hide the original Fallen Madonna in his cellar. Just outside Nouvion, the General commandeers a set of vineyards and enlists everyone in the café to help pick the grapes.
Hancock's Half Hour
Series 5, Episode 15 - The Grappling GameAnthony Aloysius St John Hancock is a loser whose plans and aspirations are continually ruined by bad luck, Sidney Balmoral James or, more often than not, by his own pomposity and ambition.
Yes, Prime Minister
Series 1, Episode 1 - The Grand DesignIt's only been 3 days since Jim found himself elevated to Downing Street, and already the strains of the job are beginning to set in. When is the point of 'last resort' for the ultimate deterrent? Should there even be one? Could the re-introduction of conscription solve unemployment? And how will he get some lunch?
Timmy Time
Spin-off from Shaun The Sheep for the CBeebies channel, featuring Timmy the baby lamb and his friends.
I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again
Series 9, Episode 3Radio Prune takes a pop at Radio 1 DJs, and James T Kink camps it up in Star Trek.
As Time Goes By
Lionel and Jean were young lovers until accidentally losing touch. Years later they meet again by chance and unexpectedly rekindle their romance.
1834
Episode 4 - Dentists And LoversNed needs root canal work, but 21st century Jason needs lessons in 19th century courting.
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 3, Episode 8 - There's Something About A SoldierYvonne wants Gary to get a 'sensible' job with her new company, while his life in the 1940s seems threatened by a returning hero. Is this the time to make a clean break with the past?
Sooty
Series 2, Episode 18 - FireworksIts fireworks night at the park, but Sooty, Sweep and Soo can't afford to go. Sooty decides to sell Curry soup and things soon hot up.
One Foot In The Grave
Series 1, Episode 3 - The Valley Of FearVictor's outing to photograph badgers ends with him being mugged. Mrs Birkett comes to regret calling at the Meldrews' to collect items for a jumble sale, and Victor finds a dead cat in the freezer.
Waiting For God
Series 2, Episode 4After a string of pearls, a host of crucifixes, and numerous other high-value items disappear from Betty's room, Harvey threatens to call the police in to investigate the apparent crimewave. It's down to Tom Holmes to solve this one.
Heavens Above!
1963 film starring Peter Sellers as a socially progressive vicar who is appointed by mistake to a wealthy parish.
HR
Series 5, Episode 4 - Everybody's Doing ItSam, addled by Kate and Peter's audible intimacy, finally decides on internet dating. Then a knock on the front door changes everything.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 25, Episode 7 - Barry Becomes A Psychopathic Killer But Only Part TimeSmiler finds himself being pursued by a woman who believes he's rich.
Hancock's Half Hour
Series 5, Episode 15 - The Grappling GameAnthony Aloysius St John Hancock is a loser whose plans and aspirations are continually ruined by bad luck, Sidney Balmoral James or, more often than not, by his own pomposity and ambition.
Bottom Knocker Street
Episode 43 - Mayor & The BearBest to stay off the streets when the bears come to town!
I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again
Series 9, Episode 3Radio Prune takes a pop at Radio 1 DJs, and James T Kink camps it up in Star Trek.
Bottom Knocker Street
Episode 24 - Till A TronicAs Meena's new till develops a mind of its own, it is not a good time to be a food critic.
Dani's House
Series 4, Episode 2 - Love At First SightDani thinks she has met the man of her dreams at a party. The next day, though, she has second thoughts. His mother works at McHurties, so dropping him may be difficult. Jack has one spare ticket for the Monster Truck Ballet. Max and Ben get into a no-holds-barred competition to be the one to go with him.
Ever Decreasing Circles
Series 4, Episode 5A dispute with a farmer over the right to use a public footpath backfires on Martin as he campaigns to liberate footpaths for the use of all the public. He finds that the same footpath runs through his back garden as well...
Steptoe And Son
Series 7, Episode 1 - Men Of LettersAlbert Steptoe and his son Harold run a rag and bone business. Harold wants to move on in the world and leave home but his plans are always thwarted.
Birds Of A Feather
Series 7, Episode 7 - Three Up, Two DownWith Darryl back inside, the business dead, and money equally unforthcoming, Sharon and Tracey are forced to consider selling Dalentrace and moving somewhere cheaper. Garth considers moving in with his girlfriend.
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 4, Episode 6 - The Jet Propelled Mother-In-LawRené is arrested by the Colonel; in exchange for his release, he agrees to hide the original Fallen Madonna in his cellar. Just outside Nouvion, the General commandeers a set of vineyards and enlists everyone in the café to help pick the grapes.
Birds Of A Feather
Series 7, Episode 8 - Are You Being Served?Sharon's feeling broody, and on the look out for a man to make her pregnant. Meanwhile, Dorien's incensed that her holiday romance wasn't as it appeared: but she's determined to make it work for her.
Yes, Prime Minister
Series 1, Episode 1 - The Grand DesignIt's only been 3 days since Jim found himself elevated to Downing Street, and already the strains of the job are beginning to set in. When is the point of 'last resort' for the ultimate deterrent? Should there even be one? Could the re-introduction of conscription solve unemployment? And how will he get some lunch?
Bless This House
Popular sitcom spin-off film starring Sid James, Terry Scott, Diana Coupland and June Whitfield.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 29, Episode 9 - Of Passion And PizzaMervyn is deeply in love with 'Her' at the pizza take-away, but he lacks the courage to tell her. Unfortunately for him, he makes the terrible mistake of letting Entwistle and Alvin bring them together.
Sooty
Series 2, Episode 19 - It's A Dog's LifeIt's Mr. Slater's annual dog show, and Sooty is determined that Sweep will win the grand prize. But will he be brave enough to attempt the Doggie Assault Course? Guest starring The Krankies.
As Time Goes By
Lionel and Jean were young lovers until accidentally losing touch. Years later they meet again by chance and unexpectedly rekindle their romance.
Duty Free
Series 3, Episode 5 - Costa Del CrimeDavid accidentally takes the wrong bag at the airport and finds himself in a spot of bother.
Monarch Of The Glen
Series 2, Episode 1Comedy drama set in the Scottish Highlands, based on the comic novels of Compton Mackenzie.
Shaun The Sheep
Series 4, Episode 8 - The RabbitThe Farmer's niece has come to visit, bringing her precious pet rabbit. The Farmer entrusts Bitzer to look after it while they go inside for lunch. All in a day's work - until the rabbit disappears. Shaun and the flock are called to action to help track down the illusive pet before the niece discovers it's missing. But do they understand what they're looking for?
Home To Roost
Series 1, Episode 4 - SuspectA string of petty criminality is sweeping the neighbourhood, and suspicion falls upon Matthew. From swapped and vandalised house signs to petty theft in the shopping arcade, it seems the young Mr Willows has some explaining to do.
Are You Being Served?
Series 10, Episode 4 - Gambling FeverLured by the chance of hitting it big on a "dead cert", the staff bet heavily on the horses. However, how are they going to watch the second race to see if they win?
Goodnight Sweetheart
Series 3, Episode 8 - There's Something About A SoldierYvonne wants Gary to get a 'sensible' job with her new company, while his life in the 1940s seems threatened by a returning hero. Is this the time to make a clean break with the past?
'Allo 'Allo!
Series 6, Episode 7 - Crabtree's Podgeon PistThe General threatens to blow up Nouvion if the airmen are not returned to his custody. Meanwhile, Michelle has another crackpot scheme to send them home, and refuses to waiver.
Second Thoughts
Series 3, Episode 1 - Sleeping PartnerWhen Hannah asks her boyfriend to stay the night, Faith is less than happy.
One Foot In The Grave
Series 1, Episode 3 - The Valley Of FearVictor's outing to photograph badgers ends with him being mugged. Mrs Birkett comes to regret calling at the Meldrews' to collect items for a jumble sale, and Victor finds a dead cat in the freezer.
4 O'Clock Club
Series 3, Episode 11 - QuicheJosh is planning to take Rachel to a music festival. But when Mum insists Josh goes with Dexter instead, Josh has to try to get a spare ticket for the sold out festival from nerdy Natalie. Trouble is, Natalie has promised the ticket to Nero.
Mind Your Own Business!
Episode 1, She'll Have to Go: An accountant tackles a tycoon over his number of women workers.
The Upper Hand
Series 1, Christmas Special - RequiemIt's Charlie and Joanna's first Christmas in Henley, but despite a big bonus Charlie has still taken on a second job to make ends meet. Caroline's concerned that he may be funding a dirty little secret...
Bottom Knocker Street
Episode 27 - World Of VegA high rating TV show offers a trillion pound prize for growing a large vegetable.
An Actor's Life For Me
Series 1, Episode 2 - I Can Do ThatRobert gets a role as a chauffeur, except he can't drive.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 25, Episode 7 - Barry Becomes A Psychopathic Killer But Only Part TimeSmiler finds himself being pursued by a woman who believes he's rich.
Only Fools And Horses
Christmas Special - DatesDel attempts to meet his dream woman at a dating agency after seeing Trigger have some success. Meanwhile, Uncle Albert is dropping heavy hints about his impending birthday...
Thanks A Lot, Milton Jones!
Series 1, Episode 4 - The B&BA friend who runs a B&B is in trouble, so it is time for Milton to dust off those nylon sheets and let the sparks fly.
Birds Of A Feather
Series 7, Episode 8 - Are You Being Served?Sharon's feeling broody, and on the look out for a man to make her pregnant. Meanwhile, Dorien's incensed that her holiday romance wasn't as it appeared: but she's determined to make it work for her.
Hancock's Half Hour
Series 5, Episode 15 - The Grappling GameAnthony Aloysius St John Hancock is a loser whose plans and aspirations are continually ruined by bad luck, Sidney Balmoral James or, more often than not, by his own pomposity and ambition.
I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again
Series 9, Episode 3Radio Prune takes a pop at Radio 1 DJs, and James T Kink camps it up in Star Trek.
Last Of The Summer Wine
Series 29, Episode 9 - Of Passion And PizzaMervyn is deeply in love with 'Her' at the pizza take-away, but he lacks the courage to tell her. Unfortunately for him, he makes the terrible mistake of letting Entwistle and Alvin bring them together.
Meet The Adebanjos
Series 2, Episode 11 - Tobi's Arsenal BirthdayDad promises to take Tobi to the Arsenal game for his birthday. When he realises how expensive tickets are, he goes to extraordinary lengths to find cheaper ones and get Tobi to the game!
Dara O Briain: School Of Hard Sums
Series 3, Episode 2Dara O Briain and learned friend Marcus du Sautoy teach guests Lee Mack and Miles Jupp a lesson or two in the engaging numbers show. The gang fence with pirate-themed posers.
Porridge
Series 2, Christmas Special - No Way OutFletcher plans to spend Christmas in hospital to avoid being press-ganged into Grouty's latest scheme to spring a fellow prisoner. His plan backfires when Grouty finds out about his upcoming civilian hospital appointment and gives him a vital role in proceedings.
Waiting For God
Series 5, Episode 4Jane, still reeling from his tryst with Marion, turns down the one thing she has always craved - a proposal of marriage from Harvey. Meanwhile, Diana reacts less than positively to a diagnosis of diabetes.
Bring Me Morecambe And Wise
Episode 1 - From Stage To ScreenA tribute to the much-loved double act, featuring never-before-seen clips of their early TV shows and a rare interview with Eric Morecambe's wife, Joan.
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Series 11, Episode 5Charlie Brooker, Jedward, Lorraine Kelly and Micky Flanagan thrash out the hot topics of the week by examining surveys, opinion polls and statistics.
Have I Got News For You
Series 45, Episode 9Paul Merton and Ian Hislop are joined by Frank Skinner in the host's chair with guest panellists Matt Forde and Miles Jupp.
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Series 13, Special - Jubilee Special8 Out Of 10 Cats is all pomp and ceremony as it celebrates the Queen's Diamond Jubilee in its own inimitable style. With guests Jennie Bond, Miles Jupp, Chris Kamara and Sarah Millican.
Only Fools And Horses
Series 6, Episode 1 - Yuppy LoveDel has gone all high-powered and trendy in an attempt to adopt a yuppy image. Rodney is unimpressed as his attention is focused on getting his computer diploma at night school.
Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps
Series 5, Episode 5 - Potato PeopleJonny is banned from the off-licence where he has been buying alcohol for a gang of kids.
Inside No. 9
Series 1, Episode 6 - The HarrowingAn episode set in a gothic mansion owned by a brother and sister who shut themselves away from the outside world.
Dave Gorman: Modern Life Is Goodish
Series 1, Episode 1 - Not A Very Nice BiscuitDave Gorman performs a series of witty stand-up shows, exclusive to Dave. The bearded wonder takes a sideways look at the messages we receive every day.
Thanks A Lot, Milton Jones!
Series 1, Episode 3 - SmugglersThe local seafarers' pub starts serving only coffee. Who better than Milton to sort it out?
Bad Education
Series 2, Episode 3 - FuneralAbbey Grove is rocked by the death of one of their staff.
Micky Flanagan: What Chance Change?
Episode 1 - 1970sIn this opening episode Micky talks about growing up in the East End in the 1970s.
Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps
Series 5, Episode 6 - AntlersGaz's plans for Jonny's stag night go badly wrong, when he discovers that all their friends & acquaintances know that he slept with Janet.
Threesome
Series 1, Episode 1Alice turns 30 and has a drug-addled threesome with her boyfriend and their gay friend. When she discovers she's pregnant it's a decision whether to keep it or not.
Doll & Em
Series 1, Episode 4On set, Em's anxiety about her performance grows when she's distracted by a co-star.
Mock The Week
Series 5, Episode 10Ed Byrne joins Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle whilst Gina Yashere joins Russell Howard and Andy Parsons.
History Retweeted
Episode 4 - The Fall of the Berlin WallEast meets West in the field of online dating, 1980s children's programming pops up on your screen, and Tim Berners-Lee tweets about his world-changing new invention.
On The Town With The League Of Gentlemen
Episode 3 - Go to Joan GloverLegs Akimbo Theatre Company visit Spent School, which now has a new new-age headteacher who wants to add ballet to the boys P.E. curriculum.
My Mad Fat Diary
Series 2, Episode 4 - Chapter 4: FridayAs Rae grows closer to Liam, his new girlfriend Amy starts getting suspicious and threatens to beat Rae up if she doesn't back off her man. Meanwhile, Archie is struggling to cope after Rae outed him to Lois. When Lois threatens to tell the entire college the truth, Archie has to decide if he can finally face his fears and come out.
Men Behaving Badly
Series 4, Episode 3 - PornographyFlat share sitcom following security salesman Gary and his lodger, as they attempt to navigate the opposite sex.
The Michael McIntyre Chat Show
Episode 1 - Terry Wogan, Lily Allen, Alan SugarMichael McIntyre launches his new chat show. He is joined by Sir Terry Wogan, singer Lily Allen, and Lord Sugar.
Nurse
Series 1, Episode 4The comedy following a community psychiatric nurse on her rounds continues.
The Michael McIntyre Chat Show
Episode 1 - Terry Wogan, Lily Allen, Alan SugarMichael McIntyre launches his new chat show. He is joined by Sir Terry Wogan, singer Lily Allen, and Lord Sugar.
PhoneShop
Series 2, Episode 5 - Come Dine With WeAs a 'Personality Greeter' is added to the staff roster, and a busking saxophonist vies for Janine's affections, Ashley realises a lifelong ambition; while Jerwayne finds that race can still be a barrier to love.
Frank Skinner's Opinionated
Series 3, Episode 1 - SalfordThis week Frank is in Salford and Dave Gorman is amongst the guests joining him.
The Jonathan Ross Show
Series 6, Episode 10 - Richard Branson, Jennifer Hudson, Davina McCall, Sue PerkinsJonathan welcomes billionaire business tycoon and soon-to-be astronaut Sir Richard Branson, singer and Oscar-winning actress Jennifer Hudson, Great British Bake Off star Sue Perkins and presenter Davina McCall. There is also music from multi-platinum rockers Elbow.
Early Doors
Series 1, Episode 3Ken is forced to downsize the transport for the Big Boy's Beano, they'll be going in a taxi soon.
Blandings
Series 2, Episode 4 - Lord Emsworth Acts For The BestClarence has grown a preposterous beard and Beach must ensure the world never gets to see it. Meanwhile, Freddie woos a Hollywood starlet by making a movie at Blandings: but Connie mustn't find out. Matters are complicated by religious maniac Drusilla on the prowl.
Comedy Central At The Comedy Store
Stand-up comedy from London's famous club, The Comedy Store.
The Michael McIntyre Chat Show
Episode 1 - Terry Wogan, Lily Allen, Alan SugarMichael McIntyre launches his new chat show. He is joined by Sir Terry Wogan, singer Lily Allen, and Lord Sugar.
Birds Of A Feather
Series 7, Episode 8 - Are You Being Served?Sharon's feeling broody, and on the look out for a man to make her pregnant. Meanwhile, Dorien's incensed that her holiday romance wasn't as it appeared: but she's determined to make it work for her.
Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps
Series 5, Episode 5 - Potato PeopleJonny is banned from the off-licence where he has been buying alcohol for a gang of kids.
Blandings
Series 2, Episode 4 - Lord Emsworth Acts For The BestClarence has grown a preposterous beard and Beach must ensure the world never gets to see it. Meanwhile, Freddie woos a Hollywood starlet by making a movie at Blandings: but Connie mustn't find out. Matters are complicated by religious maniac Drusilla on the prowl.
Have I Got News For You
Series 45, Episode 9Paul Merton and Ian Hislop are joined by Frank Skinner in the host's chair with guest panellists Matt Forde and Miles Jupp.
Absolutely Fabulous
Series 1, Episode 3 - FranceEdina and Patsy are off for a jaunt in France. Arriving at the wrong place, they struggle to find food until Saffron and Bubble arrive. After drinking liberally and actually enjoying a game of ping-pong, they are given an urgent message by Bubble.
The Inbetweeners
Series 3, Episode 2 - The Gig And The GirlfriendSimon is chasing a fit girl in the year below, so to impress her, he goes to his first gig since his mum took him to see Take That at Wembley Arena. Will, Jay and Neil tag along and pretty much ruin Simon's chances, but thankfully the bouncers are nice enough.
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Series 11, Episode 3Guests Gok Wan, Sarah Millican, Seann Walsh and Amy Childs from The Only Way Is Essex, assist Jon, Jimmy and Sean to thrash out the hot topics of the week.
Blandings
Series 2, Episode 4 - Lord Emsworth Acts For The BestClarence has grown a preposterous beard and Beach must ensure the world never gets to see it. Meanwhile, Freddie woos a Hollywood starlet by making a movie at Blandings: but Connie mustn't find out. Matters are complicated by religious maniac Drusilla on the prowl.
Fake Reaction
Series 2, Episode 10Guests facing fish snogging, bottom kneading, mouse trap jewellery and a foul-tasting century egg are Lawson's Ryan Fletcher, McFly's Dougie Poynter, comedian Mae Martin and former Sugababe Mutya Buena.
Porridge
Series 2, Christmas Special - No Way OutFletcher plans to spend Christmas in hospital to avoid being press-ganged into Grouty's latest scheme to spring a fellow prisoner. His plan backfires when Grouty finds out about his upcoming civilian hospital appointment and gives him a vital role in proceedings.
Monarch Of The Glen
Series 2, Episode 1Comedy drama set in the Scottish Highlands, based on the comic novels of Compton Mackenzie.
Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps
Series 5, Episode 6 - AntlersGaz's plans for Jonny's stag night go badly wrong, when he discovers that all their friends & acquaintances know that he slept with Janet.
Dave Gorman: Modern Life Is Goodish
Series 1, Episode 1 - Not A Very Nice BiscuitDave Gorman performs a series of witty stand-up shows, exclusive to Dave. The bearded wonder takes a sideways look at the messages we receive every day.
Men Behaving Badly
Series 4, Episode 3 - PornographyFlat share sitcom following security salesman Gary and his lodger, as they attempt to navigate the opposite sex.
Threesome
Series 1, Episode 1Alice turns 30 and has a drug-addled threesome with her boyfriend and their gay friend. When she discovers she's pregnant it's a decision whether to keep it or not.
1834
Episode 4 - Dentists And LoversNed needs root canal work, but 21st century Jason needs lessons in 19th century courting.
8 Out Of 10 Cats
Series 17, Episode 4The teams are joined by guests Mel Giedroyc, Johnny Vegas, Aisling Bea and Kym Marsh.
Early Doors
Series 1, Episode 3Ken is forced to downsize the transport for the Big Boy's Beano, they'll be going in a taxi soon.
Mock The Week
Series 5, Episode 10Ed Byrne joins Hugh Dennis and Frankie Boyle whilst Gina Yashere joins Russell Howard and Andy Parsons.
Tommy Cooper
Sketch, stand-up and magic from the inimitable Tommy Cooper.
Impractical Jokers
Series 2, Episode 3The jokers pose as opticians who offer very unusual eye tests; compete to fall asleep on complete strangers for as long as they can; pitch ludicrous inventions to focus groups; and give away '50 per cent off' vouchers for the most embarrassing products ever.
Pramface
Series 3, Episode 3 - Proper Little FamilyLaura pushes Jamie over the edge when she admits she doesn't want to move in with him. Meanwhile, Mike finds himself in trouble when he falls for a gangster's daughter, and Sandra takes on the caravan site snob.
Dirty Sexy Funny: Olivia Lee
A hidden camera prank show for Comedy Central starring Olivia Lee. Features stunts, scripted sketches and setups.
Birds Of A Feather
Series 7, Episode 9 - Never The TwainWith Tracey refusing to visit him, Darryl's sinking into depression and contemplating suicide. Meanwhile, Dorien's tabloid gossip doesn't quite go to plan, Sharon's search for a man has hit the buffers, and Garth is moving - to France!
Mind Your Own Business!
Episode 1, She'll Have to Go: An accountant tackles a tycoon over his number of women workers.
An Actor's Life For Me
Series 1, Episode 2 - I Can Do ThatRobert gets a role as a chauffeur, except he can't drive.