Schedule Wednesday 28th August 2013

Bread

Aveline is taken to hospital and the family gather to comfort her. Joey finds out that Roxy is married.

One Foot In The Grave

A day out in the country and a gentle trip on the river leads to epic complications for the Meldrews, Mrs Warboys and Nick Swainey when they find themselves marooned in the middle of a misty river.

'Allo 'Allo!

Upon hearing that Denise has escaped, René disguises himself as his own father and searches for a safe hiding place. With the café machine-gunned, Denise's followers capture René - but it is not him she is out to get.

North East Of Eden

Festival time on the island, but will a mystery illness put an end to Marcia's fun?

My Teenage Diary

Ken Livingstone reads from his 1966 diary, when he hitchhiked across the Sahara Desert.

'Allo 'Allo!

With the General breathing ever-closer down his neck over the location of the paintings, the Colonel issues René an ultimatium. Meanwhile, Michelle explains her plans for a long-distance duck to transport the microfilm, and Madame Edith goes into hiding - as LeClerc.

Rising Damp

The house is plunged into confusion and mourning when Rigsby discovers basement tenant Mr Osborne, stiff as a board.

Hancock's Half Hour

Anthony Aloysius St John Hancock is a loser whose plans and aspirations are continually ruined by bad luck, Sidney Balmoral James or, more often than not, by his own pomposity and ambition.

My Family

Susan asks Ben to help an old girlfriend of hers through a divorce, but nearly precipitates her own.

Dani's Castle

Jimmy discovers things in the country are not as simple as he thinks. Dani gets some dance training for the annual Bogmoor Ball.

I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again

Truthful army recruitment, and Professor Prune's travels in his trousers.

Bread

Joey is forced to confront Roxy's husband, with unusual results, and Aveline decides to give up her modelling career.

Sooty

Mr Slater is coming for tea! Sooty is cleaning Richard's room, Sweep is in charge of the dishes, and all is set for a great evening. But with a crazy vacuum cleaner on the loose and Richard covered in paint, their plans for a dream tea look set for disaster!

Crowned Hudds

Liberation for Helen of Troy?

Sooty

Richard is making donuts to sell in the park but he has run out of eggs. Perhaps the local farmer and his chickens can help? Sooty and the gang take a trip in the campervan to find out - but leave Richard in a rather messy situation!

My Family

When Ben's uncle dies, his inheritance may not live up to his expectations, but another investment causes problems.

Tomorrow, Today!

Sylvia is forced to face her worst fear and work with a child.

Last Of The Summer Wine

A letter intended for Compo interests the town and terrifies his son, Tom.

Horrible Histories

Some WWI soldiers try some very unusual ways to cure frostbite in the winter. Plus, the not at all romantic movie starring William the Conqueror, the story of Aztec Emperor Motecuhzoma, and a strange Stuart doctor takes a snooze during the middle of a battle.

Last Of The Summer Wine

Barry finds promotion at the building society brings problems.

John Bishop's Only Joking

Proving to be a popular chap, John Bishop is joined by another ragtag group of guests, notably comics Mick Ferry and Matthew Crosby, and TV presenters Caroline Flack and Les Dennis.

Only Fools And Horses

While out shopping at Top-Buys, the Trotters are taken to the supermarket manager's office believing that they have won a prize. Instead, they are held hostage when an armed robbery goes wrong.

John Bishop's Only Joking

The Bish mines more comedy gold with the help of this week's guests - take your pick from funny ladies Tiffany Stevenson and Katherine Ryan, small screen stars Joanna Page and John Thomson, and many more.

Monarch Of The Glen

Comedy drama set in the Scottish Highlands, based on the comic novels of Compton Mackenzie.

Hancock's Half Hour

Anthony Aloysius St John Hancock is a loser whose plans and aspirations are continually ruined by bad luck, Sidney Balmoral James or, more often than not, by his own pomposity and ambition.

Only Fools And Horses

When a pretty niece of Trigger's arrives in the Nag's Head, Del and Rodney indulge in a little sibling rivalry in an effort to win her fair hand. One of them, however, ends up doing a spot of unscheduled hang-gliding.

I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again

Truthful army recruitment, and Professor Prune's travels in his trousers.

'Allo 'Allo!

Upon hearing that Denise has escaped, René disguises himself as his own father and searches for a safe hiding place. With the café machine-gunned, Denise's followers capture René - but it is not him she is out to get.

'Allo 'Allo!

With the General breathing ever-closer down his neck over the location of the paintings, the Colonel issues René an ultimatium. Meanwhile, Michelle explains her plans for a long-distance duck to transport the microfilm, and Madame Edith goes into hiding - as LeClerc.

The Ghosts Of Berkeley Square

Comedy about a pair of ghosts, condemned to haunt a London house in the time of Queen Anne, until such a time as a Royal visits the property.

My Phone Genie

Jaz, Naoko and Mobbsy want to be superheroes, but Gene gives them all rather unusual and not very superhero powers!

My Parents Are Aliens

Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.

My Family

Susan asks Ben to help an old girlfriend of hers through a divorce, but nearly precipitates her own.

Last Of The Summer Wine

Marina goes to buy a hairnet but returns with a piece of life-saving equipment.

My Family

When Ben's uncle dies, his inheritance may not live up to his expectations, but another investment causes problems.

Birds Of A Feather

Sharon and Tracey's pool business goes into decline as Winter sets in, and Dorien also finds herself broke after Marcus cancels all of her credit cards. Sharon and Tracey decide to go into the double-glazing business and think that Dorien would be the ideal person to do the door-to-door selling...

DNN

Bob has enraged Stacey-May Anaïs, who meets boy band Lawson, by using her One Direction towel; Jahmene investigates photo-bombing; and Gary Odgen attempts to swim with Steve Parry.

Last Of The Summer Wine

A letter intended for Compo interests the town and terrifies his son, Tom.

Birds Of A Feather

Sharon falls asleep and enters a parallel universe in which she is the wealthy sister, Tracey is the poor relation and Dorien is Doreen her char lady...

The Upper Hand

An unexpected caller at the front door has an up-front proposition for Charlie - she also happens to be Laura's psychology professor! Meanwhile, Caroline's busy work schedule leads to an embarrassing encounter in the bathroom.

Last Of The Summer Wine

Barry finds promotion at the building society brings problems.

Duty Free

Eccentric holiday maker, Neville Thwaite has taken a shine to David and Linda but, although keen to help them, he manages to get everything wrong!

The Vicar Of Dibley

Following the death of the ancient Reverend Pottle, the inhabitants of rural backwater Dibley are looking forward to a younger, more mentally capable ecclesiastical figure. However, they'd be less surprised to see Mr Blobby popping up in their pulpit than the buxom Geraldine Granger - a female vicar!

Home To Roost

Matthew becomes a vegetarian, but what is in the cardboard box, and why is Henry brandishing a poker?

No Commitments

Episode 12.6, Game, Set and Match: With Emily and Nick safely married, can Victoria persuade Roger to buy a house in France?

Gigglebiz

CBeebies legend Justin Fletcher gets the nation's under-sixes laughing their socks off with his collection of crazy comedy characters.

Outnumbered

There is a lot to discuss at Ben's parents' evening including muggers, dangerous chemicals and re-enactments of the Great Plague. Mum is still suspicious Jake is hiding something and Karen decides which of the world's great religions to lead.

Monarch Of The Glen

Comedy drama set in the Scottish Highlands, based on the comic novels of Compton Mackenzie.

My Parents Are Aliens

Long-running children's sitcom following the lives of three orphaned children. Their new foster parents are secretly aliens.

4 O'Clock Club

Dexter takes the 4 O'Clock regulars on a half-term camping trip. But due to a mix-up they have to turn back and head home. To salvage something from the trip, Josh comes up with a bold idea for where they can camp instead.

North East Of Eden

Festival time on the island, but will a mystery illness put an end to Marcia's fun?

Miranda

After an impromptu 'date' is planned with long-term crush Gary Preston, Miranda decides to take a trip to the new 'bespoke' clothing store, Transformers, to pick an outfit guaranteed to stop people calling her sir to her face.

Miranda

Miranda is rather British when it comes to sex, or shenanigans as she likes to call it. Trying to overcome her hang-ups she decides the way forward with Gary would be to create a romantic moment so he'll see her in a sexual light.

Last Of The Summer Wine

Marina goes to buy a hairnet but returns with a piece of life-saving equipment.

QI

With Phill Jupitus, Ross Noble and Jack Dee.

Hancock's Half Hour

Anthony Aloysius St John Hancock is a loser whose plans and aspirations are continually ruined by bad luck, Sidney Balmoral James or, more often than not, by his own pomposity and ambition.

Only Fools And Horses

Rodney has been commissioned to make a film by the Local Community Arts Centre. Unfortunately, Del and Mickey Pearce take over, and the expensive equipment is soon covering weddings and all sorts - and then there's the cast and sponsor list for his production...

Birds Of A Feather

Sharon and Tracey's pool business goes into decline as Winter sets in, and Dorien also finds herself broke after Marcus cancels all of her credit cards. Sharon and Tracey decide to go into the double-glazing business and think that Dorien would be the ideal person to do the door-to-door selling...

I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again

Truthful army recruitment, and Professor Prune's travels in his trousers.

Outnumbered

Mum is still convinced Jake has a secret. Ben is determined to enter a school talent competition with an unusual double act. Then a couple of surprise callers make life more difficult than usual for the family.

Birds Of A Feather

Sharon falls asleep and enters a parallel universe in which she is the wealthy sister, Tracey is the poor relation and Dorien is Doreen her char lady...

The Vicar Of Dibley

Geraldine receives a letter from the BBC: they've heard of her incumbency, and want to film an episode of Songs Of Praise in the village. David is far from keen, but finds himself outvoted by the other councillors. When the crew turn up, the vicar is particularly enamoured by the dashing young producer, Tristan; unfortunately the recording does not go smoothly.

Jongleurs Live!

New series of stand-up comedy broadcasts from Jongleurs comedy clubs, for digital channel Loaded TV.

QI

With Sue Perkins, Bill Bailey and Gyles Brandreth.

Absolutely Fabulous

Patsy actually has to go into her office. At a rare meeting, she's told she has to give two members of the public a makeover and appear on morning television with them. After an argument with the chosen plebs, Saffron and Eddy's mother are drawn in.

Chickens

It's Bonfire Night and the women of Rittle-on-Sea are struggling to decide who should be the Guy they burn, whittling their options down to three.

Miranda

Miranda heads to the gym and, after a fuchsia-face-inducing workout, decides it's perhaps not quite for her. She must therefore find a way of getting out of her water-tight contract with the gym.

Russell Howard's Good News

Topical stand-up comedy and chat show hosted by Russell Howard.

My Teenage Diary

Ken Livingstone reads from his 1966 diary, when he hitchhiked across the Sahara Desert.

Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason

Comedy sequel with more embarrassments and romantic messes for the diary-keeping heroine. Hapless Bridget gets cold feet about her relationship.

A League Of Their Own

James Corden and the gang return for an all-new run of the smash-hit sports panel show. With gold medallist Amy Williams, Dutch footballer Edgar Davids and Jimmy Carr as guests.

Seann Walsh World

The biggest spider ever, laddish banter, money saving with Roy, and internet 'sexperts' feature this week.

Jongleurs Live!

New series of stand-up comedy broadcasts from Jongleurs comedy clubs, for digital channel Loaded TV.

Russell Howard's Good News

Topical stand-up comedy and chat show hosted by Russell Howard.

Armando Iannucci's Charm Offensive

With Will Smith, Natalie Haynes and Clive Anderson

Great Night Out

When the lads try to pep Daz up after yet another row with girlfriend Colleen, Glyn's first day in his new job as a chauffeur for local psycho gangster Mad Tony is badly affected.

Miranda

Miranda decides she needs to be a bit reckless and wild and so decides to book a holiday at the local hotel down the road.

Michael McIntyre: Live & Laughing

A TV broadcast of Michael McIntyre's sell-out 2008 stand-up show which cemented the comic's status as one of the UK's top stand-up stars.

Jongleurs Live!

New series of stand-up comedy broadcasts from Jongleurs comedy clubs, for digital channel Loaded TV.

Mock The Week

With guests Chris Addison, Ed Byrne and Stewart Francis.

James Acaster's Findings

Stand-up comedian James Acaster presents the results of his in-depth research into the subject of bread, assisted by his trusty sidekick Nathaniel Metcalfe.

We'll find out why the French struggle to come up with a snappy slogan to advertise Brioche, learn why the Bagel is so trendy, and discover the hidden anti-bread propaganda pushed at children through the medium of fairytales.

Josie Long - All Of The Planet's Wonders

Josie uses the book Astronomy for Dummies to try and unravel the greater mysteries of the cosmos.

What To Do If You're Not Like Everybody Else

Andrew examines the effort we all put into our personal appearance and the pressure we feel to look good.

Men Behaving Badly

Gary finally agrees to make a commitment to Dorothy, but then faces up to his last night of freedom.

Birds Of A Feather

Sharon and Tracey's pool business goes into decline as Winter sets in, and Dorien also finds herself broke after Marcus cancels all of her credit cards. Sharon and Tracey decide to go into the double-glazing business and think that Dorien would be the ideal person to do the door-to-door selling...

The Harpoon

Episode 1: The nostalgic spiffing spoof of adventure story papers for boys.

Never Mind The Buzzcocks

Rocker Alice Cooper hosts the pop quiz. He's joined by guest panellists Olly Murs, Wretch 32, Rufus Hound and Penny Smith.

Getting On

Kim's dream of an uneventful night shift is quickly scuppered.

Frank Skinner's Opinionated

This week Frank is in Salford and Dave Gorman is amongst the guests joining him.

Boom Town

Tonight, Cream The Rapper takes an in-between job as a librarian; Kev The Witch, also a telepathist, turns to more traditional methods of communication; whilst Alan has another activity lined up for his elderly residents: life drawing.

Absolutely Fabulous

Patsy actually has to go into her office. At a rare meeting, she's told she has to give two members of the public a makeover and appear on morning television with them. After an argument with the chosen plebs, Saffron and Eddy's mother are drawn in.

Jongleurs Live!

New series of stand-up comedy broadcasts from Jongleurs comedy clubs, for digital channel Loaded TV.

Russell Howard's Good News

Topical stand-up comedy and chat show hosted by Russell Howard.

Badults

A night of reminiscing and revelation as Tom, Ben and Rachel help Matthew remember what happened to a missing childhood toy. If Matthew can track down his final Pog he will have a complete collection in mint condition and they'll all be rich.

Birds Of A Feather

After seven years, Darryl and Chris are to be released from prison. Tracey is really happy, Sharon isn't; she doesn't want to see Chris and she thinks she'll have to move out of the house when Darryl returns.

Men Behaving Badly

Gary finally agrees to make a commitment to Dorothy, but then faces up to his last night of freedom.

Comedy Central At The Comedy Store

Stand-up comedy from London's famous club, The Comedy Store.

Edinburgh Comedy Fest Live

Back for its fourth year, Scotland's finest and funniest, Kevin Bridges, hosts the Edinburgh Comedy Fest Live.

Rising Damp

The house is plunged into confusion and mourning when Rigsby discovers basement tenant Mr Osborne, stiff as a board.

Getting On

Kim's dream of an uneventful night shift is quickly scuppered.

Mock The Week

With guests Chris Addison, Ed Byrne and Stewart Francis.

Crowned Hudds

Liberation for Helen of Troy?

The Comic Strip Presents...

What if there were armies from Russia and America occupying Britain?

Jongleurs Live!

New series of stand-up comedy broadcasts from Jongleurs comedy clubs, for digital channel Loaded TV.

Never Mind The Buzzcocks

Rocker Alice Cooper hosts the pop quiz. He's joined by guest panellists Olly Murs, Wretch 32, Rufus Hound and Penny Smith.

Tomorrow, Today!

Sylvia is forced to face her worst fear and work with a child.

Crapston Villas

Stop motion clay animation sitcom observing the antics of the inhabitants of the much sought-after residential property Crapston Villas.

Jongleurs Live!

New series of stand-up comedy broadcasts from Jongleurs comedy clubs, for digital channel Loaded TV.

Frank Skinner's Opinionated

This week Frank is in Salford and Dave Gorman is amongst the guests joining him.

Russell Howard's Good News

Topical stand-up comedy and chat show hosted by Russell Howard.

No Commitments

Episode 12.6, Game, Set and Match: With Emily and Nick safely married, can Victoria persuade Roger to buy a house in France?

North East Of Eden

Festival time on the island, but will a mystery illness put an end to Marcia's fun?