The Unbelievable Truth

David Mitchell is joined by Tony Hawks, Lucy Porter, Zoe Lyons and Justin Edwards, who are obliged to talk with deliberate inaccuracy on subjects as varied as stationery, fast food, the Tudors and swearing.

The Truths

Justin Edwards - Stationery

- Americans purchase over 11 billion paperclips every year. Found by Lucy.

- During the First World War, semen was used as invisible ink. Found by Zoe.

- The noise of the doors on the Starship Enterprise in Star Trek was made by pulling and pushing a piece of paper into an envelope, followed by the squeak of a shoe on the floor. Found by Tony.

- In Ancient Assyria, both letters and envelopes were made out of pottery. Successfully smuggled.

- A Sheffield inventor created a ballpoint pen which changes into a coat hanger. Successfully smuggled.

Zoe Lyons - Fast Food

- Chinese branches of Burger King serve a PooPoo Smoothie. Launched in 2014, it is a mango-flavoured ice fruit drink, which contains pearls which explode in your mouth upon consumption. Found by Tony.

- In 2005, a man named Ronald MacDonald was arrested for trying to steal cash from a New Hampshire branch of Wendy's. Found by Justin.

- Computer giant Apple has a patient for a round pizza box. Found by Tony.

- The specially blended egg used Subway omelette sandwiches has similar properties to roof sealant. The "premium egg blend" contains glycerine, which is also found in soap and shaving cream; dimethyl polysiloxane, which is also found in silly putty; and calcium silicate, a sealant used in roofs and concrete. Found by Justin.

- KFC created its own KFC Extra Crispy Sunscreen. Successfully smuggled.

Lucy Porter - The Tudors

- Catherine Howard practiced being beheaded. According to her ladies-in-waiting in the Tower of London, when she found out she was going to be executed, she asked that a chopping block be brought to her room, and spent the evening before her death laying in the right position. The next morning, the executioner took of her head with a single blow. Successfully smuggled.

- The Tudors invented the word "email". It was used as an alternative to the word "enamel". Successfully smuggled.

- The Tudors also invented the word "texting". It meant: "to write in large, neat letters". Successfully smuggled.

- Henry VIII's last wife Catherine Parr was named after his first wife Catherine of Aragon. Parr's mother was lady-in-waiting to Aragon, and made the queen godmother to her daughter. Successfully smuggled.

- Henry VIII would unwind by playing darts. Successfully smuggled.

Tony Hawks - Swearing

- Swearing makes you better at tolerating pain, with the f-word being most effective. Found by Zoe.

- Swearing is a sign of intelligence, with those with bigger vocabularies swearing more. Found by Lucy.

- There is a Mount Buggery in Australia. Found by Justin.

- Viewers once complained to Ofcom about a lack of swearing in Monty Python Live (Mostly). Successfully smuggled.

- Johannes Brahms was a heavy drinker known for his shocking behaviour at respectable gatherings, once getting drunk and using a word so shocking that it broke up the party he was attending and no-one would repeat it. Brahms would have been familiar with rough language as he played music in pubs and brothels for money as a young man. Successfully smuggled.

Scores

- Lucy Porter: 5 points
- Justin Edwards: 2 points
- Tony Hawks: 0 points
- Zoe Lyons: -1 point