The Manuscript

Rule #1: A modern man should learn at school not to make a fool of himself ogling sexy ladies. (James Acaster)

Rule #2: If your wife is pregnant don't panic; just cherish her and be nice to her. Or you can try basting her in oil.

Rule #3: A man should only fall madly in love on a first date with someone if he is 'emotionally available'. (Andrew Maxwell)

Man of the Week: U14 Geddington Tennis Champion Richard Huxley - and a peculiar chap named Claude... (nominated by James Acaster)