My Mate's A Footballer
- Radio chat show
- BBC Radio 5 Live / BBC Sounds
- 2023 - 2024
- 38 episodes (2 series)
Comic football podcast in which Joe Wilkinson attempts to befriend Patrick Bamford.
- Series 3, Episode 14 repeated Wednesday at 6:15pm on Five Live
Series menu
Series 1
1. Can Joe Wilkinson Become Best Friends With Patrick Bamford?
Friday 17th November 2023
Joe Wilkinson reveals his plan of how he will become best mates with a professional footballer. He and Patrick Bamford discuss the importance of friendship and Patrick reveals who the most popular man in football is and whether it's possible for Aaron Ramsdale to be friends with David Raya at Arsenal.
2. How Much Impact Can A New Manager Really Have?
Friday 24th November 2023
Early into their relationship, Joe & Pat discuss everything that new managers can change.
3. Patrick Bamford's 5-A-Side Clinic
Friday 1st December 2023
An episode about transfers gets derailed as Joe asks Pat how to become a better player.
4. Moving To Chelsea On Transfer Deadline Day
Friday 8th December 2023
Joe gets back on track this episode as Pat reveals what it's like to be transferred.
5. How To Organise a Football Team Christmas do
Tuesday 26th December 2023
n order to fund the team Christmas party, the captain collects fines throughout the season. Joe finds out how that cash is spent by the Leeds team as they let their hair down.
Christmas Special: Joe on MOTD and Other Landmark Footballing Moments
Friday 29th December 2023
Patrick Bamford reveals what happened when his move to Chelsea came out of the blue and Joe alerts Pat to some unsettling news about a cardboard cut-out and a comedian friend.
7. Giant Killings, Bonuses And Crap Pitches - The FA Cup
Monday 1st January 2024
What is it like to play in the FA Cup for a big side vs a smaller club wanting a scalp.
8. Patrick Bamford's Wonder Goal
Friday 12th January 2024
After becoming an FA Cup icon, Patrick tells Joe all about THAT goal he scored against Peterborough and how Gary Lineker might be able to take some credit for the strike.
9. What Ingredients Do You Need For A Good Run Of Form?
Friday 19th January 2024
Pat is having a good run so Joe wants to work out what contributes to his impressive form.
10. Patrick Challenges Joe To Prove He's Good At Free Kicks
Friday 26th January 2024
After weeks of hearing about Joe's supposedly stupendous free kick taking ability, Pat lays down a challenge which involves a trip to the Leeds training ground.
11. Patrick Challenges Joe To Prove He's Good At Free Kicks
Friday 2nd February 2024
After weeks of hearing about Joe's supposedly stupendous free kick taking ability, Pat lays down a challenge which involves a trip to the Leeds training ground.
12. Patrick Bamford's Personal Team
Saturday 10th February 2024
Patrick opens up to Joe about everything he's invested in to help deal with the pressures of football in terms of nutrition, being physically fit and being mentally strong.
13. The First England Call-up
Saturday 17th February 2024
After being distracted in the original episode about landmark moments, Joe and Pat reconvene to discuss more important moments from his career.
14. The Home Life Of A Footballer
Saturday 24th February 2024
Joe finds out what life is like for Patrick when he's not focussed on football including how to choose where to live and whether he's contractually allowed to ride a motorbike. Pat reveals a gross misjudgement on his choice of accommodation whilst on loan and how he's transformed his garage.
15. Inside A Football Dressing Room (And A Private Jet)
Saturday 2nd March 2024
Joe is very excited to learn exactly what goes on inside a dressing room and covers everything from the food on offer to the best (and worst) facilities in the Premier League.
16. What Does 'Style of Play' Actually Mean?
Saturday 9th March 2024
What's the difference between a press and a counter-press? Route one and possession football? Counter-attacking and parking the bus? Patrick nobly attempts to explain these football tactics to a bemused Joe.
17. Your Questions Answered (Plus Erling Haaland's Lovely Lips)
Saturday 16th March 2024
After receiving hundreds of messages, Patrick and Joe open the floor to your questions. For some reason Patrick's agreed to answer anything Joe asks on behalf of the listeners, so expect the hosts to tackle such burning and contentious issues as "what's your favourite dinosaur?". We also discover what non-footballing things players think about when they're on the pitch, and how Patrick really feels about his FIFA avatar.
18. Your Questions Answered - Part Two
Saturday 23rd March 2024
Pat gets grilled on his recent handball, VAR and developing the 'dark arts' of football in another episode where Joe puts some of your questions to Patrick.
19. Joe and Patrick Finally Meet at Leeds' Training Ground
Saturday 30th March 2024
After recording almost an entire series of a pod together Joe and Patrick finally meet in the flesh at the Leeds training ground where the stage is set for Joe to take a free kick. First though, he gets free rein to wander round the building speaking to whoever he bumps into and asking the kit man questions like: "What do you mean you melted everyone's trainers?"
20. Is Joe Wilkinson actually good at taking free kicks?
Saturday 6th April 2024
Joe has regretted mentioning this ever since the first episode of the podcast, but now let's all find out whether Joe Wilkinson could actually become a set-piece specialist.
