Susan Nickson

Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps Cancelled

They've got another two rounds in but last orders has been called for Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps.

Two Pints? Two endings...

The ending of the eighth series of Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps is to be decide by the sitcom's fans. BBC Three viewers will vote online to decide the outcome of a love triangle between Gaz, Janet and Donna.

Review of the Comic Relief Special: Having crammed the casts of all three programmes onto one small set, leaving them with little to do except stand awkwardly around like infants at a Christmas concert, the show proceeded to unleash a barrage of the lamest jokes ever be to inflicted in the name of charity. In a good cause? Certainly. Terrible? Definitely. But then my opinion is poisoned by an abiding aversion to Coming Of Age. Working to combat poverty, suffering and injustice is all well and good, but if Comic Relief promised to eradicate Coming Of Age I would really put my hand in my pocket.

Did we like it? Hell no! Now on its eighth series, Two Pints has now become a parody of itself. With the exception of Friends and ER not many American shows, never mind hurriedly written and produced British ones, can justify eight series. Two Pints used to be a witty and inspiring reflection of the ordinary working class hero boozing down the local with their mates. Now it remains a hollow vessel.

For Comic Relief, the makers united the 2 Pints gang with characters from its sister sitcoms Grownups and Coming of Age, but even though this was for charity, we can't overlook the fact that this was a load of self indulgent old guff.

Comic Relief Special Review

These shows are clearly aimed at complete morons. The kind of moron that actually talks in text speak. You could improve the world immeasurably by finding out where they film this shite and dropping concrete flags from a helicopter over the exit at closing time.

Apart from this being written by the same writer of Two Pints Of Lager, and also starring Sheridan Smith off of Two Pints Of Lager, and focusing on a group of 20-somethings like Two Pints Of Lager, this is nothing like Two Pints Of Lager. For instance, this is set in Manchester, not Runcorn. Anyway, this continues Sheridan's efforts to stop acting like a flipping teenager. Really, who'd still have Take That posters up these days...

According to BBC3 controller Danny Cohen "a huge focus on risk and innovation" is what his channel is all about. Fair dos. Let's have a look at BBC3's comedy output, then. What's on tonight?

12.15: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps
12.45: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps

Ach. What about tomorrow?

11.55: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps
12.25: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps
2.20: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps
2.50: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps

Balls to it! Surely there's something good to watch on Friday?

12.40: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps
1.10: Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps

Oh for heaven's sake. I'm pretty radged off at being presented with dreck like Two Pints twice a bloody evening while genius like Snuff Box lies dormant - and nobody at the Beeb seems to be worried.

Grownups is like Two Pints without the jokes

As a big fan of Two Pints I should like Grownups too as both are written by Susan Nickson and feature Sheridan Smith but the first series did not grab me that much.

So I've got sat here two preview DVDs with all eight episodes of Grown Ups on it. It's the new BBC3 sitcom "from the creator of Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps", no less, which transmits on 9 May. On the basis of the ep I've watched, Susan Nickson isn't going to become famed for her versatility any time soon. The writer is pretty much replaying the same old Two Pints preconceptions and ticks. In short, that's childish twentysomethings obsessing over sex and sherbet Dib Dabs.

I'm only here for the beer

The Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps world is inhabited by flimsy stereotypes cut out from How To Build Your Own Lad And Ladettes Funbook, who spout pseudo-smart one liners and for whom smoking a fag qualifies as a defining characteristic.