Joanna Lumley

Sky's star-filled success story of recent years has been this yuletide anthology, a sprinkling of cheer across the festive schedules. Two of the autobiographical shorts have even sired fantastic series - Kathy Burke's Walking and Talking and Chris O'Dowd's Moone Boy.

The third series opens by whisking us back to the swinging and sexist Sixties. Baby, Be Blonde sees the young Joanna Lumley (played with wide-eyed charm by newcomer Ottilie Mackintosh) contending with haircuts and wig-fittings before her jittery first assignment.

Daniel Ings is uproariously awful as a photographer who marshals his models like animals ("Put the hippo at the back"). And Lumley, making her directorial debut as well as a cameo as a dragonish fashionista, reveals the facts behind the fun in a 15-minute look behind the scenes. The next Little Cracker, featuring Rebecca Front, is on Sky1 tomorrow.

The swinging, sexist '60s are brought to life by Joanna Lumley in her vaguely autobiographical debut behind the camera, launching another series of short comedies for Sky1. The story of young Joanna's (Ottilie Mackintosh) journey from eager-to-please young model to wiser, bolshier woman is a slight one, leaning heavily on the marvellous, hits-heavy soundtrack and featuring a couple of odd lighting decisions from the tyro director. But it's gently endearing and Mackintosh is a winning lead. Shame, then, that the final 15 minutes is taken up by a 'making of' which, quite frankly, we could have lived without. As charming as Lumley undoubtedly is, the levels of luvviedom hit toxic in short order.

A welcome return for the seasonal series of cheery autobiographical shorts, each one bringing to life an anecdote from the youthful days of a sackful of star celebs. Pulling the first of this year's Crackers is national treasure Joanna Lumley, who draws on her modelling roots to play a magazine editor taking charge at a photoshoot, with newcomer Ottilie Mackintosh facing the daunting task of posing as the 19-year-old Lumley.

Joanna Lumley directs this vignette from the early days of her modelling career. Aspiring model Jo arrives in 1960s London, where no one will take her seriously until she forks out for a pricey blonde wig. Sure enough, an oily snapper called Dan takes a shine to her new Aryan incarnation and she starts getting bookings. These shorts are always best for the mini making-of documentary afterwards where the featured "famous" talks us through the process of going behind the camera.

The seasonal return of the Little Crackers series, which features comedy shorts based on the autobiographical recollections of various actors and comedians. Previous participants have included Stephen Fry, Victoria Wood, Jack Whitehall and Sheridan Smith. This latest series begins with Joanna Lumley's Baby, Be Blonde, in which the 19-year-old Jo (Ottilie Mackintosh) is a struggling model who gets a break when she buys a blonde wig. "It didn't, but it made me feel that I had changed the course of my life," says Lumley in the behind-the-scenes film which follows the short. Also starring this week in later episodes are Rebecca Front and Caroline Quentin.

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I don't wish to raise unnecessary alarm, but there was a rather strange development at BBC1 last Monday as the continuity guy introduced the Absolutely Fabulous Olympic special. Because these were his exact words: 'Next tonight, comedy gold as Eddie and Patsy get into the Olympic spirit.'

My initial concern here was that the BBC appeared to have caught a nasty case of 'reviewing our own show' disease, which medical sources suggest was first brought into this country by a Mr S Cowell, of London. Half an hour later.

If this is to be the last we see of their grotesque creations they will never be able to say with any degree of honesty that they went out on a high.

I had an even greater problem. Namely, how do I go about suing the national broadcaster for a flagrant breach of the Trades Descriptions Act?
Because this was not gold of any kind, least of all comedy. In fact, for the most part it wasn't comedy of any kind, either.

Yes, there was the odd wry Olympics observation, although nothing that could touch the satirical majesty of BBC2's brilliant Twenty Twelve. And yes, there was a very clever sight gag when Patsy held up Eddie's body contouring all-in-one.
But the rest of the jokes were so lame that on more than one occasion I swear I spotted Derek Redmond's dad rushing up to help them over the line.

They saved the worst one - a real stinker about Clare Balding which I cannot even bring myself to commit to print here - until near the end. (Presumably the thinking was that they would get away with it because most people would have switched off by then.)

Of course, it is Jennifer Saunders and Joanna Lumley I feel most sorry for. If this is to be the last we see of their grotesque creations they will never be able to say with any degree of honesty that they went out on a high.
In Olympic terms, they never even got near the podium.

At best it had the feel of a tired and uninspired end-of-the-run panto. At worst it was like watching a low-rent drag act spewing out filth and innuendo in the vain hope of getting at least one laugh in a grotty East End pub.

Plus, it was in no way helped by the most irritatingly intrusive laughter track in history, which featured one spectacularly loud woman who sounded like a hyena on HRT being fed into a woodchipper.

On a more positive note, it will have provided a welcome boost to David Jason's ego. Because thanks to some of the physical comedy on show here, his performances in The Royal Bodyguard have now slipped to No 2 on this year's Most Toe-Curling TV Slapstick chart.
David can also boast that the BBC didn't hijack his show and fill it with sneaky and self-congratulatory plugs for their upcoming Jubilee coverage. Jennifer Saunders didn't get off so lightly.

First say (the criminally wasted Julia Sawalha) had a line about how much better the TV coverage of the Olympics is in Britain than in Africa. Then Gran (the genuinely wonderful June Whitfield) gave the BBC another premature pat on the back with this closing thought: 'I don't understand why anyone would actually want to be there when they can watch it in comfort on the good old Auntie Beeb.'