Alex Kingston

Hope springs eternal whenever I get set for a new British drama. I don't demand too much: believable characters; some wit; a mood-enhancing soundtrack; a story that makes some kind of sense; performances that hint the actors haven't just learnt their lines in the nearest portable loo. Suffice to say, Hope Springs fails on all counts.

Bad Girls meets Hustle on the backlot of Take The High Road, Hope Springs stars Alex Kingston as the leader of a group of four ex-jailbirds who have unfeasibly scammed a cool £3million from Alex's too-timing gangster bloke. For reasons too absurdly contrived to bother with, they wind up hiding out in the Scottish Highlands at a hotel where Annette Crosbie spends every waking moment getting plastered. You can see where she's coming from.

Don't be too shocked, but their hideout is not the rural idyll it looks. Far from passing their time tossing shortbread and knitting haggie, the Hope Springs locals spend their time murdering, plotting, covering up dark secrets and eyeing up the new girls in town. It's the kind of material David Lynch could turn into a surreal and alluring mystery. But Hope Springs reduced it to Carry On Up The Caber cliche.

The unbearably jaunty background music set the tone. When the action needed a touch of tension, what you got was what sounded like a jingle for a snack biscuit. And what Paul Higgins (brilliant as Jamie in The Thick Of It) was doing in it as a drippy policeman is anybody's guess. You can only hope for his sake that he gets to cuddle up to the corpse beneath the floorboards before this shambles kills his career stone dead.

Despite advertising itself as a 'sparklingly modern, quirky and funny new comedy-drama' and boasting a starry cast, this latest offering from Shed Productions (Bad Girls) is the dampest of damp squibs. Four female ex-cons (led by Alex Kingston) steal £3 million in cash from a fellow villain and start a new life in a miserable hotel in Scotland. It is like Footballers' Wives crossed with Castaway, only without charm, humour or excitement to make up for its lack of plausibility.

When I tell you Hope Springs comes from the same stable as Bad Girls and Footballers' Wives, you'll know it isn't a searing human drama where finely-etched characters battle existential angst. No, it's a cheerful piece of nonsense featuring a cockernee-sounding Alex Kingston as the head of a band of female ex-cons whose final job goes pear-shaped (sorry, I can't help myself) and who hide out in the Highland hamlet Hope Springs. It's your typical fish-out-of-water fare as the silliest of the women screams in terror at a motionless sheep and the Kingston character exchanges moody glances with the presentable local policeman (Paul Higgins). If you need to know more, let me tell you that in Hope Springs, a man performing the kiss of life on a woman is seen as a comedy romantic gesture.

It takes a certain type of programme to tick all the right boxes when it comes to Sunday evening telly. Escapism is essential, as is plenty of pretty scenery and a good selection of likeable characters, but you also need a central storyline with at least a little substance.

And on early evidence this new comedy-drama, starring Alex Kingston, Sian Reeves, Christine Bottomley and Vinette Robinson, shows promise on pretty much every front.

Alex Kingston heads up a gang of feisty females in this new comedy drama. Worry not, Heartbeat fans - your favourite Sunday evening drama may be strolling casually to an end, but this quirky offering may sate your appetite for colourful characters in rural locations. Having run off with her gangster hubby's cash, Alex 'ER' Kingston and three glam pals lie low by taking over a hotel in a remote Scottish village owned by Margaret Meldrew. Brilliant fun!

The new Ballykissangel stars Alex Kingston with a terrible accent as the woman who ripped off her gangster husband and moved to scenic Scotland to escape. Good in an inoffensive kind of way. At least she's not actually called Hope.

Alex Kingston heads up the cast in this light drama about a group of female ex-cons who perform one last job that goes horribly wrong. And when that happens, what do you do? That's right, you head to a small village in the Scottish Highlands and hide from the law. Erm... sounds great. Actually, this should be rather enjoyable in a jolly, Monarch of the Glen type way, so it seems churlish to complain.

Alex Kingston stars in this new comedy drama about a group of four female ex-cons. They aim to start a new life in Barbados, armed with £3 million stolen from Ellie's (Kingston) gangster husband. But when that plan goes wrong, they find themselves hiding out in a hotel in the remote Scottish village of Hope Springs.