John Shuttleworth
Published: Tuesday 29th October 2024
One random comedian, eight random questions; it's the ultimate test of funny person and fate. This week we welcome our favourite keyboard warrior - meaning he's a seasoned Yamaha-rocking songsmith, not trolling celebrities - who is back on the road, and the shelves.
We've enjoyed access to an early version of his upcoming book, John Shuttleworth Takes The Biscuit: A Crumbly Selection Of Songs & Stories, which is chock full of bitesize Shuttleworth nuggets. Tall tales, short tales, song lyrics, a dedicated comic strip; lovely stuff. And what about his new live extravaganza?
"My new show is called Raise the Oof!" says John. "Like many of my show titles in the past (Pillock of the Community, One Foot in the Gravy), it's a typo. It should've been Raise the Roof! in celebration of 40 years in showbusiness, although I'm hoping also a DIY guide to essential shed repairs."
The veteran performer has torn the roof off a few venues, during those dolby decades (also the name of his 2008 album, featuring both the upbeat Two Margarines and poignant I Can't Go Back to Savoury Now: such versatility). How does he keep it up?
"The secret to those 40 years? Well, I'm still struggling to make it, to get a booking at the British Legion where payment isn't just my petrol money (£3.82). I'll keep going for another 40 years if I have to, or maybe just another 40 weeks. We'll see."
The tour runs from January to mid April, so he'll definitely squeeze that in, either way. But in the meantime, John Shuttleworth, your Random 8 await:
Who was your childhood hero?
I had a couple. Newscasters Kenneth Kendall and Richard Baker I admired for remaining so calm as they told us about the latest tragedies in the world in the sixties and seventies. They were also immaculately besuited, and this instilled in me the desire to always be smartly attired (although you know, I do wear me joggers when I'm chill-axing!)
You could argue they should have smiled a bit more (and even chuckled occasionally), but then they'd have been accused of acting inappropriately, so you can't win, can you? Bill Giles the weatherman - he was of a similar ilk, although he caused that big gale, didn't he, so he's no hero of mine!
What's the best thing you ever bought?
Undoubtedly my Yamaha PSS51. No, it's not a motorbike (although there may be one with that model number), it's my electronic organ with built in auto-accompaniment. Mind you, I did once own a Honda 70 - no, it's not a lawnmower! It's a motor scooter which boasted tartan pannier bags with shiny buckles that jingled whenever I encountered a bump in the road.
Which British town deserves more attention?
The seaside town of Mablethorpe in Lincolnshire. Why? It's not just because it has so many amusement arcades, nor because the doughnuts are freshly made and full of sugary goodness, but because the Ghost Train still only costs 50p and isn't remotely scary. Well, that was the situation when I last visited in the mid '90s.
Oh and it's next to Sutton-on-Sea where my agent Ken Worthington has a beach chalet (I maintain the door lock, and the roof, checking for tile damage and any water ingress - oof, we're back to my show title - Raise the Oof!)
Ever walked out of a film, before the end?
I did indeed walk out of Avatar: The Way of Water in 2022. Well, hobbled more like, as I was experiencing a sudden and painful bout of sciatica, and couldn't keep still in my seat. I was gutted to have left just as the plot was hotting up, although when I returned just before the end, I found Ken fast asleep and it seemed to be the same scene as when I left. Happy ending: I found my bag of Revels which I'd left on my seat - luckily Ken hadn't noticed them!
What's the best thing in your wardrobe?
My purple leather jacket, I suppose, or could it be my red roll-neck sweater? Then again, where would I be without my beige polyester slacks?
What's your favourite phrase or expression?
'Oof!'. Well, apparently I say it a lot so it must be. However, if I disagree with someone I'm very likely to say 'You've made a grave error!' Or 'You're very wide of the mark, lad!'
Ever had a really disastrous holiday?
Mary my wife and I once borrowed Doreen Melody's camper van for a minibreak in the Peak District. It should have been the holiday of a lifetime, but it turned into a nightmare when we realised that next-door neighbour (and sole agent) Ken Worthington had come along too - inadvertently.
He was clinging to the sturdy chrome ladder at the back when we set off, and we didn't hear his anguished cries. When I first noticed him in my rear view mirror, I assumed it was a gonk Doreen had fixed to the back window as a lucky mascot. Ken was very lucky to survive, but the silly man ruined our holiday!
Who's the most interesting person you've ever met?
That's a difficult one. Betty at the hospice is a contender, and so is Ray Pashley who used to run a Sports shop in Dronfield. Then again, my sole agent Ken Worthington is a fascinating individual. After all, he enjoys a daily mid-morning Malibu, and he came last on New Faces in '73. If that's not interesting, I'd like to know what is?
John Shuttleworth: Raise the Oof! tours from 29th January 29. Tickets
John Shuttleworth Takes the Biscuit: A Crumbly Selection of Songs & Stories is out in March. Pre-order below.
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Love comedy? Find out moreJohn Shuttleworth Takes The Biscuit: A Crumbly Selection Of Songs & Stories
In John Shuttleworth Takes The Biscuit, English song-writer and presenter John Shuttleworth presents a crumbly selection of songs and stories.
This new book boasts many original and hilarious stories about John Shuttleworth's life in and around Sheffield. There are also lots of his song lyrics reproduced with his kind permission (although permission didn't need to be sought, he really wouldn't have minded them being included. In fact, he would have been devastated if they hadn't been!).
Colourful and eye-catching cartoons by long-time friend and collaborator Kevin Baldwin illustrate some of the songs.
There is even a short story - a cautionary tale starring sleazy salesman, Peter Cornelious, called Peeping Peter.
First published: Thursday 6th March 2025
- Publisher: Omnibus
- Pages: 240
- Catalogue: 9781915841308
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