Alexandra Haddow

Written by: Si Hawkins
Published: Tuesday 11th July 2023

One random comedian, eight random questions: it's the ultimate test of funny person and fate. This week we welcome a very recent award winner, Alexandra Haddow, who walked off with the West End Comedy Club working class bursary on Saturday, which conferred a very handy £500 into her coffers as she prepares for a big August.

Haddow is about to make her full Edinburgh debut with the show Not My Finest Hour - is that title a clever plan to tempt the critics?

"Oh God, you've only just put that critics idea in my head!" the comic exclaims. "Hopefully they'll think it too hack to use that as a headline if they don't like the show.

"It's about something I did wrong in my twenties and how I feel about it now, it's also sort of about the wider culture of people saying they're 'unapologetic' when they should just sometimes say sorry. It's about growing up in Corby, losing my virginity, and something else that happened to me that you have to watch the show to find out about. There's a lot going on!"

She'll be cutting it a bit fine just squeezing that into an hour. And any interesting offstage Edinburgh plans?

"Offstage plans include trying to be good for the first two weeks (do not tempt me to go out), maybe getting up Arthur's Seat a few times (sorry Arthur), and throwing a Fringe special version of my club night Indie Amnesty called Fringey Amnesty at Dropkick Murphys on the 24th August so everyone can have a blowout!

"I also can't wait to watch loads of great shows of course. Oh, and eat as many macaroni pies as I can."

Hopefully not at the same time. For now, Alexandra Haddow, your Random 8 await:

Who is - or was - your most interesting relative?

I'd love to go on Who Do You Think You Are? and find out everything about my lineage in case someone invented the space hopper, or jam. But my Nan was a woman who I always feel like would have flourished if she was born a bit later on.

She worked factory jobs all her life and left Scotland to live in Corby for work but when she retired she took up art classes at the local college and turned my dad's room into a little studio for herself. She got a dog and went swimming twice a week and basically lived the life of a romcom heroine after a break-up despite being told all her life that there was a set way of being for a married woman of that time.

She had a wicked sense of humour and used to laugh at stupid poems I'd write her. So maybe she's to blame for my career. It's either her or my niece who currently makes woofing noises at any animal she sees.

Is there a book or film that changed your life?

Billy Elliot made me want to be a dancer. I was obsessed with dancing already and used to go to four or five classes a week, but this film made me genuinely believe I could make it in the West End. I still haven't given up hope.

The comedy is just a springboard for my dance career really. I also had a huge crush on the guy who played his brother so that changed my life in terms of a sexual awakening. Never sleep with a man who doesn't dance.

Which place you've visited was the biggest anti-climax?

Machu Pichu. You've seen a thousand photos of it before you get there and it's not that great.

Me and my friend Doug decided we were going to do the seven day Inca trail when he was living in Peru and working as a teacher. Then we saw there was a three day hike, then a one day one, then someone mentioned a glass-top train up there and we had a glass of wine and didn't hike at all.

Thank God because if I'd have paid a fortune to hike for seven days just to see some ruins I'd have kicked off. I know you're supposed to say it's amazing but honestly, save yourself the time and do something else.

Your most embarrassing moment?

I once got a free spray tan when I worked at LOOK magazine back in the day because they were having a big party. Fake Bake came into the office to do them for us. I asked them for the lightest one they had because I'm so pale so I just wanted a healthy glow. I don't know what the woman heard but I came out of there like a hate crime.

Everyone was looking at me and I was wearing a white shirt which only made it look worse. I also bumped into the guy I fancied at the time on the way back from the station walking home that night and he asked me if I was ill or if there was something he could do. Thanks Fake Bake!

Ever met a particularly great or awful famous person?

I worked in magazines before I was a comedian (and still do now sometimes) and my friend Amy graciously bowed out of interviewing Bill Nighy so that I could. She was the writer and our editor definitely didn't trust me to be serious enough for the job so she pretended she'd do it and subbed me in at the last minute because I loved him.

He called me Alexandra throughout (instead of Alex) and was as charming as you think he would be. Hit me up if you ever get bored of Anna Wintour, Bill! Claudia Winkleman, Lauren Laverne and Grayson Perry are also Very Good Eggs (TM).

I can't think of any awful ones but my friend is a TV producer and she has a long list of people who seem hideous to work with, but you'd have to get me drunk to spill the gossip.

What's the worst thing in your wardrobe?

According to my friend Jamie, almost everything. I love all the gems I own but there's an eighties flower print, puff sleeve wraparound top in there that makes most people look at me like I've lost my mind.

But according to my Scottish dad and my Ireland-supporting boyfriend, my England shirt.

Favourite building?

Ooooh, great question. For the Gatsby feeling when you walk into the lobby, The Ned. For the actual spirit of the place, The Bill Murray comedy club. And for my fantasy life, one of those townhouses in Islington that backs onto the canal. Can I borrow £6 million?

Ever gate-crashed anything interesting?

Me and my ex-boyfriend once crashed a gallery opening, got chatting to a member of the House of Lords, and got asked to leave because we'd sunk so much of the free wine.

Me and my pal gate-crashed what we thought was a singles night but was actually a flatmate-finding networking evening. Very confusing when someone asked us how much we'd be willing to pay.

Also my best friend and I once went to a funeral and then at the graveyard afterwards we went to the wrong burial which I think is probably the worst one. The man's widow was looking at us with pure rage. Which is fair.