David Morgan

The Alan Carr of ITV2 - as one student heckler almost put it - the doing-rather-well David Morgan presented I'm A Celebrity spin-off IACGMOOH Now last year, and is currently onscreen (well, maybe not right this minute - it's probably football) on the second series of Safeword.

"I'm a team captain with Katherine Ryan and it's the best fun," says Morgan. "We ridicule - with due deference - celebrities in a roast and all over their Twitter. It's my favourite thing."

Aside from the telly, he's still a busy stand-up "gigging all over the place and gearing up for a summer full of festivals, music... not Edinburgh this time!"

Hopefully his absence isn't because of an incident at the infamous Fringe night SPANK! involving a naked lady and 9/11. But we'll get to that...

First gig?

A bar in Leicester called Bambu in 2007. It was the end of a course that had been set up by the (bloody excellent) Leicester Comedy Festival so the audience was a very supportive mix of friends, family and people from my day job. It was packed and a great gig. I don't think any of the others who performed that night are still going though.

Favourite show, ever?

The most ecstatic I've ever felt after a gig would be the first time I ever performed an hour. It was at The Crumblin' Cookie before they built the PERFECT comedy room in their basement. I was so nervous and panicked before the show. Until you try to do an hour it seems so monolithic, so getting through it and giving people a good and funny show feels incredible. It was a big milestone for me.

Worst gig?

Sevenoaks, Kent. Christmas. I was MCing Jim Smallman, Terry Saunders and Andrew O'Neill. It was in a theatre where they inexplicably have you perform in front of the curtain on what ends up being a foot-wide ledge. In front of me were hundreds of angry Kent people: imagine 400 Farages annoyed at a lacklustre Christmas dinner.

Back then I was properly baby faced and they did not warm to me, after they realised I was a gayboy too they turned even more. I tried my very best but I was properly dying on my hole, I introduced Terry on to the stage and as he shook my hand he whispered "I died here exactly one year ago."

Terry told them this when he got to the mic, they yelled "are you gay too?" and Terry replied "well, no, technically bisexual". We struggled on, it was not a fun gig. They were nice to the acts but they hated me so so hard. Andrew was on last, after he heard what they were like to me he said "well, I was going to go on as normal as I could, but fuck 'em get me my dress." Magnificent, but we still left through the back door.

Who's the most disagreeable person you've come across in the business?

HA! OH GOD, A CAREER-ENDING QUESTION. There are a few dick-swinging comics that when I see on the line up my heart sinks because I can't be bothered to manage their awfulness in the acts' room (not all boys by the way, girls can dick swing too). None of them are terrible people and most of them are incredible comics so you kind of forgive their backstage prickishness, but god you can feel the room unclench when they leave.

The weirdest gig?

If you've been to SPANK! [at the Edinburgh Fringe], you'll know about the naked promo. This woman came up to Corrie, who runs it, and said she'd do the naked promo if she could get to her pants, say a thing and then get naked. She was in her 40s and looked normal so Corrie had said yes.

She got on stage and started to strip, once she had the microphone she opened with "so we all knew where we were on 9/11" - already incredible. She started to tell a story about how some comedians did a gig in a helicopter with survivors of the attacks, it's already weird, but then, she tells the single most racist joke I have ever heard, drops her knickers, bows both ways and leaves.

No one knows what is going on, Eric Lampaert had to follow it, he did great but ended up also getting naked. Watching all of this was the headliner Michael Che who, after Eric was nude, turned to Corrie to ask "what is this gig?" Magical.

Is there one routine/gag you loved, that audiences inexplicably didn't?

I had this really long bit about trying to explain nationality and country borders to a child. I liked the ideas and there were some funny jokes but no one ever liked it. Some of the lines have made it into new better bits though.

What's your best insider travel tip, for touring comics?

I'm terrible at planning and travel, I can't drive so I'm on trains all the time. One tip I like is, in East Midlands trains, sit in the carriage that's half standard and half first class, the Wi-Fi in that bit is all free. Also, if the train is packed, just sit in first class and hope they declassify it.

The most memorable review, heckle or post-gig reaction?

Oh god, I only remember the bad ones. One gig hits particularly strong for this. It was a student gig on the coast and the promotors had decided to do a competition entitled 'Draw your MC' where they had to draw me. Horrific right? I still have all the entries; some are incredible but the one that sticks out wasn't a drawing it was just the words 'SHIT ALAN CARR' in marker pen. Nice.

How do you feel about where your career is at, right now?

Now you're just repeating the questions my nightmares ask me. I'm happy with where I've gotten, I have been lucky enough to get two series of Safeword and I got to go to the jungle for I'm A Celeb. I'm really enjoying the circuit and the bits of telly I'm doing but I've still got a lot of work to do.

David Morgan is on Safeword on ITV2, Thursdays at 10pm.