Bread & Geller

Written by: Si Hawkins
Published: Friday 8th March 2019

Bread and circuses. That was the Roman poet and satirist Juvenal's expression for the gluttonous pursuits and frivolous pastimes that keep the proles distracted while the privileged political elite do despicable things in plain sight. Honestly, it's amazing the phrase has survived: as if we'd all let something like that happen nowadays! Sigh.

Anyway, let's think positive: today is International Woman's Day, after all, and we're talking comedy careers with Ellie Ross, the female member of another floury double-act. Rising stars. Not half-baked at all.

"I'm one half of Bread & Geller," says Ross, "cheeky little sketch duo, often colleagues, sometimes pals. We're doing a work-in-progress on March 9 at the Vault Festival, and then the Brighton Fringe in May."

They're on a roll. Ross and Andrew Bloomer - the clue is in the surnames - had a thoroughly promising 2018, coming second in the Leicester Square Theatre's annual Sketch Off! final and enjoying a debut stint at the Edinburgh Fringe. They've risen pretty rapidly, in fact.

First gig?

At the Canal Café Theatre, London, in 2017. It was a full hour, just us, four weeks after we formed (what were we thinking?). We were publicising it before we even had a name. Luckily nothing writes a show like panic, and our audience very generously LOLed in all the right places.

Favourite show, ever?

One Saturday in Edinburgh, we had the world's most raucous audience. Half of them arrived pissed (not easy for a midday slot), and it was a total bloodbath - in a good way. They were great.

Worst gig?

Also in Edinburgh. Our tech box broke about five minutes before a show. The audience had to wait in a damp, cramped stairwell while we tried (and failed) to fix it, then sat through a technical disaster. Beyoncé coming on during a suicide scene was a low point.

After the show someone tweeted his sympathy, saying "I can't believe Bastille played on repeat between every sketch!" I was too embarrassed to tell him that part was actually intentional...

The weirdest live experience?

At a Halloween gig we needed a volunteer to eat a packet of Skittles. When I picked someone, he kept saying "I really can't" but I blindly ignored him and pulled him out of his seat. Once he was onstage, he leaned into the mic and said: "Seriously. I can't. I'm severely diabetic." So I suppose nearly killing someone was quite weird?

Who's the most disagreeable person you've come across in the business?

Andrew, but I'm stuck with him.

Is there one routine/gag you loved, that audiences inexplicably didn't?

Oh, so many. We used to do a sketch about Dr Seuss being a depressed cocaine addict. It was so funny in my living room but never anywhere else.

Do you have any bread-based tips, for busy, badly-nourished comics?

You'll have to ask Andy - I'm Geller (if you want any good Ross Geller-based tips, I'm your gal)

The most memorable review, heckle or post-gig reaction?

Someone once told us they thought they were coming to see Penn & Teller.

How do you feel about where your career is at, right now?

I'm writing this in my pyjamas. With The Chase on pause. On a Wednesday afternoon.