Joe Bor: How Jewish is Jewish Enough?

Written by: Joe Bor
Published: Friday 30th March 2018

Having won a Jewish stand-up competition, Joe Bor found himself performing at Jewish events... but he was soon wondering whether he was a 'fraud'.

When I won Jewish Comedian Of The Year in 2007, I'd only recently started performing stand-up comedy and barely saw myself as a stand-up comedian, I also questioned my Judaism, so this felt like a thoroughly undeserved prize.

It was a big deal for me as Paul Kaye and Maureen Lipman were the judges - two people I really admired. It was a typical Jewish gig; everyone was Jewish, there wasn't much alcohol but there was a lovely big buffet. Most of the shows I had done up until that point tended to be above pubs and mostly attended by comedians and their mates, so this was very different for me; but the gig went well and, to my complete surprise, I won!

Winning this award meant I suddenly found myself booked to perform at a range of Jewish events which I almost definitely wasn't equipped for. I had two problems - not only was I a very new comic, but I also didn't consider myself religiously Jewish; I didn't regularly go to the synagogue, I didn't often wear a kippah and I ate pork (a lot).

Most of the Jewish events went fine, but I felt like even more of an imposter when, after one gig, a Jewish promoter got a complaint saying I wasn't 'Jewish enough' and I did contemplate bringing my mum back to prove them wrong.

I was proud to be 'Jewish Comedian of the Year', but I didn't want to come across as a fraud (but equally I didn't want to say no to gigs!). Generally for me, being a stand-up is about being as honest as possible on stage, but I kept finding myself thinking, 'how Jewish is Jewish enough?'.

As my experience on stage developed and I continued to talk about my life, through doing this, I soon realised my Jewish-ness was very much there, even if it was more cultural than religious. I realised that, even though they weren't religious, my parents were still very Jewish in their ways and, like many modern Jewish families, every now and then we'd suddenly have to be kosher when we went to see my gran... although I did once order bacon in front of her; my mum responded by kicking me under the table and my order was swiftly changed!

I found that when I started talking on stage about my neurosis, my overbearing mother and my preoccupation with food I soon realised that these were all themes that are quintessential to Jewish comedy but equally, all themes that weren't alienating to a non-Jewish audience.

I recently went to a lecture at the Jewish Book Week (see, I am Jewish!), and heard Jeremy Dauber the Atran Professor of Yiddish Language, Literature, and Culture at Columbia University talk about his book Jewish Comedy: A Serious History; in it he identifies seven specific strands of Jewish comedy:
'A response to anti-Semitism'; 'a satirical gaze at Jewish social and communal norms'; 'Intellectual material'; 'Vulgar and body obsessed jokes'; 'Mordant and ironic material'; 'Folksy jokes' and 'observations on the ambiguous nature of Jewishness'. I think I've touched on all of these themes at some point in my career (although not as much on the intellectual material as my mum would like).

I was eventually invited back to perform for the Jewish promoter who had questioned my authenticity - and at the end of the gig an audience member came up to me and said she really enjoyed hearing about my Jewish mother and wanted to hear more. I'm sure this was because she was a Jewish mother herself, but this gave me the confidence to write more about my mum. I also saw David Baddiel's show where he talks about his Jewish mother (who seemed eerily similar to mine) which definitely made me realise that the non orthodox Jewish family is a great source of humour.

Through writing and performing my show, A Room With A Jew, I have realised just how culturally Jewish I am. I'm never going to be Jackie Mason, but I am still Jewish.

Gotta go, I've got a bagel in the toaster (and four missed calls from my mum).