Jerry Sadowitz interview 2014

Last year we interviewed Jerry Sadowitz on the eve of a stand-up comedy tour. Sadly, it didn't go very well. This year he is touring a magic show, which is his great passion, and given that the number of dates are in double figures this time, we thought he would be inclined to answer a few questions in a more positive vein, so we emailed him. Here are his answers!

Hi Jerry. Your tour is called 'Comedian, Magician, Psychopath'. Is there any significance to the word Comedian coming before Magician? The show is primarily to show off your magic skills this time?

Thanks for spotting this mistake, Columbo. Now take your question and FUCK OFF.

A psychopath is defined as 'a person suffering from chronic mental disorder with abnormal or violent social behaviour'. Are you, via that show title, saying you fit that description?

NO, I'm not implying that at ALL. What the fuck's the MATTER with you?!!

To try and get a bit of an idea of your off-stage life and whether your on stage persona is exaggerated, could we ask do you have many people you'd call friends? What do you do on your days off?

Friends over what time period? Close friends or glorified acquaintances? And which days off? Please could you be more specific, you fucking TWAT, so I can give some stirring insight that will enhance the enjoyment of both punters who come to the show.

Your friend Mark Blanco died in circumstances that some people, but not the police, are describing as suspicious. Could you tell us a bit more about that case?

If you go to www.justiceformark.com that will tell you everything you need to know. I hope as many people as possible will help Mark's mother in any way they can, even if it's just writing to the Metropolitan Police to remind them what a bunch of dodgy incompetent cunts they all are. I mean if you can't secure a conviction from the blindingly obvious, then someone is either corrupt as hell or too incompetent for the job.

It'd be fair to say that most live entertainment shows wouldn't start the night off by screening an appeal from Mark's mother. Do you think other comedians and magicians aren't using their profiles enough in regards to getting involved and helping in causes they feel passionately about?

Oh, FUCK OFF.

Focusing back on magic, what do you think it is about the art that first captured and still holds your interest?

I never had any interest in magic. When my plane crash landed in The Himalayan mountains, I was rescued by Tibetan Monks who endowed me with super powers to do highly difficult, low entertainment value card tricks in front of seated audiences. My agent, also in the crash, was given super powers to run off with my wife.

Which fellow comedians and/or magicians do you admire?

"Fellow comedians...?" How did you even get this job you glorified TWEET ??

What are your favourite magic tricks? - one of yours, and someone else's please.

Walking on Dynamo (WHAT KIND OF FUCKING NAME IS THAT???!!!!) And that double act... the one where they make the little girl disappear.

Dynamo is perhaps becoming the best know magician in the UK now due to his high-profile TV shows - your thoughts on him?

The rise of dynamo is comparable to the rise of Hitler only more depressing. Against incredible odds, both got through.

In the beginning, an otherwise knowledgeable magician called Bill Kalush, inexplicably promoted and produced a half-wit (I'm being kind here) called David Blaine. Having no particular skill, Blaine's team used fraudulent "methods" to achieve his tricks, and, having no entertainment skills, put him on the street and used whatever editing means at their disposal to make him look engaging and talented.

Then along comes British TV commissioning editors who have zero imagination or talent so they recreate all future magicians in Blaine's image, since British commissioning editors can only copy what they see in America. So now we have second hand versions of the original sin, which means more fraudulent editing, more camera trickery, more stooges, more preparing and manipulating spectators beforehand, more advisors, and every other form of cheating except talent and skill. So the only person actually being fooled is the self-deluded twat himself.

As for reactions, anyone can get a great reaction from kids on the street who have no life and now suddenly find themselves getting attention from a TV camera. Even worse, these borderline retards corral celebrities to give them public endorsements. Well, what the fuck does Chris Martin of Coldplay know about magic?? And who would be crass enough to show Stephen Hawking a card trick to bolster their career, presumably so they could say "D-UH..I FOOLED STEVEN HAWKINS."

Worse yet are the kind of tricks and stunts they WANT to do on TV... things that appeal to their dangerously deluded egos in the hope that the viewers will think they are messiahs, when in fact they are the equivalent of frankenstinian boy bands miming to songs they didn't even write, and whose words don't relate in any way to the retards they emanate from.

And absolutely worst of all is that these "magicians" make Paul Daniels (a mediocre technician, poor entertainer, and awful human being) seem great retrospectively. And if you think it can't sink any further... keep watching TV.

Your tour sees you performing from Scotland down to Hove. Do you enjoy bringing your show to people, or is the travel a necessary evil of having to earn money to live?

I love travelling any distance, and risking my own money, to bring happiness to others. I am Ken Dodd, and the laughter of strangers is its own reward.

OF COURSE IT'S A NECESSARY EVIL !!!! They should all get on a fucking bus and come and see ME. I haven't got time to go to INVERNESS and fucking DONCASTER!!! in fact, STAY AT HOME and PayPal me your money!! Look at it this way.....It's money you owe me for laughing at my other incarnations, you fucking COCKSUCKERS.

What is next after the tour? Any set plans? Magic seems to be coming back into fashion with commissioners (with the likes of The Illusionists making it onto ITV, and Troy Von Scheibner on Channel 4), any thoughts of trying to demonstrate what you can do in that mass medium again?

Oh SHUT UP, you fucking IDIOT.

Finally, in case it's not already clear from your answers above, could you give us a rating as to how we did this time in terms of the questioning, as compared to the last time?

GO AWAY.

Jerry's website is: www.jerrysadowitz.com

Update: We decided to have another go in 2016. He was a bit nicer that time, but still thinks our editor is a "weak middle class twonk". Read

If you missed our original interview, which really could not have gone worse, it's worth a look: 2013 interview