Nothing But Flyers All Dayer - Bobby Carroll's Fringe Diary
Published: Tuesday 13th August 2024
Today I'm going to spend the whole day on the Edinburgh Fringe, only going to see the next comedy show that flyers me, for British Comedy Guide. No road map, no schedule, no quality control. The objective? To test if you can have a worthwhile day, a true Fringe experience, with nothing pre-booked or pre-planned? Discover an act you love through sheer chance? Or is it going to be a conveyor belt of wannabes and also-rans that really are nibbling up the finite resources of the capital city? In the age of the QR code, apps, and net zero, is flyering even a valid marketing form, or a dying tradition? I have hope in my heart.
11.00: Some ground rules
1. I'm not going to repeat view anything or take up a seat at a show I already have a future ticket for.
2. It has to be comedy, or feature a known comedian, or be comedy orientated cabaret / theatre / kids show.
3. The show has to be starting within 30 minutes of me being flyered.
4. I have to change venues for each show. I don't want to get trapped in a George Square Gardens or Bar 50 bottleneck.
I have dressed as incognito as possible. Maybe I'm a San Bernadino Tourist. Maybe I'm a Lochend jakey. Hope the weather holds out. Can't see many folk hoping to hand out damp papier mâché advertising their show.
The Royal Mile seems the place to start. I usually avoid it like the plague in August. My worst fears come true as I'm handed flyers for 5 late night student musicals in a row. I retrace my footsteps and just before heading down towards the Cowgate... I get got!
Show #1: 11:45, The Globe, PBH Free Fringe, Now That's What I Call Cal Halbert
Cheeky Geordie comedy hustler Cal Halbert promises us 26 impressions and delivers over 100. Halbert is a really accomplished short-burst mimic and you could see him going down a storm at a corporate or a sportsman's dinner. He looks so incongruous in his neat blazer and slacks combo at the Fringe, though. Some of the dad jokes are ancient but at least they all get a laugh. You could see him getting through the first round of BGT. In terms of blunt force trauma entertainment value it will be a hard show to beat. His Kevin Bridges and Bill Clinton are the stand-outs.
Show #2: 13:30, Hoots at Potterow Underpass, Mr Cardboard
Drop Dead Fred for Gaulier Heads! Clowning for adults of all ages. Plenty of anarchy and imagination. There are a few surprises along the way - it was pleasingly grim, sinister and self-aware considering half the audience were young families. I guess they all took us back to childhood; just the darker, lonely recesses of playing with yourself. (Not like that). Levi Meltzer's grotesque, Nutella-smeared birthday bad boy, Huxley, might even give me nightmares. "How many am I?".
Show #3: 15:00, Counting House, Laughing Horse, Sameer Katz: Whether Conditions
Very dry, very gentle, mid-afternoon stand-up. His friends are getting wed so Katz takes down arranged marriages, dating apps and water skiing in his softly spoken Californian style. Small turn out for this one and Katz's underpowered mode got a little lost in the hum of the fans.
And then disaster strikes. I pretty much cover everywhere in the Old Town you'd expect to get flyered and not one comedy show nabs me. I'm not going to lie, I expected to be worked over during this stunt. Literally only getting 5 minutes downtime between shows, desperate for a reprieve so I can type up a note. Instead, I'm really getting my steps in. Making open eye contact with anyone with a stack of 300gsm card in their hands. I spent a long time wandering the streets looking for anything that fit my criteria. And then, on the Grassmarket, this brilliant person hooked me for a show with one of my very own quotes on the flyer, starting in a minute!...
Show #4: 16:40, Hoots @ Apex Hotel, Hannah Campbell: Mirrorball
So busy... so popular, in fact, that Campbell and I had to play Tetris with chairs and latecomers and me to fit everyone in. It was a bit of faff and the venue staff probably could have done more to problem solve. A performer shouldn't be doing that much awkward, atmosphere-sapping admin right in front of the full room she is about to entertain. Then again, Campbell is a self-confessed people pleaser...
That's the hook of the show. Campbell has a mirrorball personality and tells various tales that hang off this character flaw(?). As a through line it is a little laboured but this is a dry run for a show that I think will be a fully-fledged debut hour next year. Immaculate delivery, unfussy and earthy. There's a composure here, and assuredness that feels destined for big theatre tours. Swifties will leave happy. Her storytelling chops are strong and she doesn't set anything up that doesn't hit on a laugh. The graveyard bit will kill every time! She ties everything up in a song that is funny and sweet but also cements the good time we've just had deeper into the collective memory banks.
My kinda stand-up, Campbell just needs to ease up on the personal statement style structure and let all the good shit speak for itself. We'll make the link, you do the crowd pleasing comedy, the door staff can move the furniture. Sounds like a fairer deal.
Shout out to the hard grafting flyerers. I quickly got doorstepped by a great guy named Tim for my next show. He was so enthused about his sales pitch I had to cut him off. "It's all cool. You got me. You had me at the flyer!"
Show #5: 18:15, Laughing Horse at The Three Sisters, Cobin Millage: Fifteen Pints With a Wax Figure of Renowned Painter Pablo Picasso
Millage is someone I've seen lurking around about the outskirts of the Scottish comedy scene. An enigmatic presence. I have never caught him live and was unsure whether he was a new act who was super social or somebody with a background role in the industry who also liked to perform.
It makes no sense for someone so bedded into the Glasgow / Edinburgh scene to be playing the smallest room in the Free Festival stable. Did he put his dick into someone important's pint of Cowboy Lager at The Stand? Has he had a fistfight with everyone at the Monkey Barrel? I cannot compute that someone this bonkers and zany and funny isn't playing a better room? We need to get to the bottom of this mystery. I need answers. He says on stage he took the slot up at the last minute after an Italian ventriloquist had to cancel their run. But who can believe that? Millage is a cult bullshitter in the mode of Luke McQueen or Stuart Laws.
And, reader, I loved it. This is anti-comedy. Meta comedy. Inside baseball for freaks of the stand-up form. Yet delivered with an incongruous, upbeat, personable zing. Canadian Millage is a chirpy, merry prankster. He serves up surprise stunts and drawn out monologues but without the standard depressive, deadpan misanthropy. You know, the kind that Stewart Lee wannabes still see as the only tone these destructions can be doled out in. All the swirling markers thrown up in the air, from art history to bad shirts to janitors who have to be jacks of all trade to hand gun interruptions, reassemble, tessellated gloriously back together. They find each other in a full, fully on board, eager tiny room. Millage even proves a few times he can indeed do straight stand-up.
I've never seen it done quite like this before and in such an inauspicious venue. I doubt enough people will, even if madcap Millage sells out the rest of his run. With a show this wonderful why are we all sitting on each other's laps in a converted broom cupboard opposite the loos?
The day is already a roaring success and I am just over the halfway mark. I have sauntered past the Big Four locuses a couple of times but no dice. I decide to plant myself into the Pleasance Courtyard, eat a burger and let one of the paid shows stick onto me. Cheating? All that happens is I overhear an act I absolutely adore's promo team bad mouth them to a table next to me and then start recommending something else. Then I'm pigeonholed for a show that only has one ticket left. Sold! I join the long box office queue nearby. Only to hear the same marketeer hard sell someone else. She points at me "That guy is buying it but if you run to the back of the bars there is a quieter box office there and you'll beat him." I return the flyer. Ugh! Backing away from the Courtyard saddened.
Show #6: 20:25, Assembly Roxy, Mel McGlensey is Motorboat
John (I think) flyered me for this character comedy saucepot where a plucky little motorboat goes on a journey of sexual independence. With her Betty Boop voice and a nautical burlesque costume, Mel McGlensey really knows how to dominate a room. A very kinky show yet also gloriously innocent. I had to check her generous bow and stern for barnacles and was accused of not trying hard enough. "I promise you I am having a good hard look." I squeaked. Masterfully interactive, inclusive and very cute. Forget about Captain Daddy and the nasty old dock, come swim in the waters of sex positivity.
The back streets are oft deserted now. Have all the flyerers gone to bed early?
Show #7: 21.55, Laughing Horse City Café, Devin Gray: How To Get Away With Marriage
A South African stand-up details the frustrating culture clash with his new German wife. There's a bit of a twist at the end which is exploited well.
Do I call it a night? Hive is back to being a nightclub, live music pumps out of the doors of pretty much anywhere else. I'll give it until 11 to stop circling and head home.
In the last moment the most low key flyer ever is handed to me. A torn strip of white A4 printer paper with 'Cabaret of Terror 2300' rubber stamped on it in minimalist black ink. No other details. The rules are the rules...
Last Show #8: 23:00, PBH Banshee Labyrinth, Cabaret Of Terrors
I got a kick out of Tom Short's Ha Ha Horror last year and this is the mutated evolution in a better slot and venue. He is joined by stripping nuns, Shrek burlesque and the wonderful drag king Burt Lash!
Burt Lash's lip-syncing to the car crash moments of 00s reality telly was a genuine highlight of the day. Their sparkling beard dripped onto me as they berated me as their temporary Simon Cowell. The bodies swelled as the hour went on. The performers got an enthusiastic response, whipped up by Short's passionate earnestness as MC. He did some of his old silly tom foolery too. The lighting was excellent. He has created a safe space for queer and alt performers to find a new audience. A victory for punk entertainment.
00:05: The End
And that's me done after another stupid but rewarding all dayer at the Fringe. The hardest part was getting flyered for anything starting even remotely soon. Feeling adrift in an ocean of choices, with nowhere to dock into.
But the experiment was ultimately a success. One act who I just thought was utterly fantastic; many who took me out of my comfort zone; we got quite erotic as the day turned to night and only two meh hours...
Normal coverage resumes tomorrow. Until next year, All Dayers!
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