Did Adam Hess see a ghost at the Fringe a couple of years ago? Maybe...

1. Tell us about your career so far. Are you happy with where you're at?

I started comedy in 2011 in my final year of uni when I realised how unemployable I was and that I've never actually heard my voice in a microphone before. I had been writing jokes obsessively for years prior to that in my (bed)room but was always too scared to tell them to anyone. Then a series of 4 failed job interviews and getting fired from a call centre after 2 weeks made me realise I had to start telling them.

2. Describe your show in exactly 23 words.

Nobody told me until I was 12 that it looks weird to wear knee-high socks with swimming trunks. That sort of stuff.

3. Why are you putting yourself through this famously stressful experience?

My friends don't listen to me when I talk but for some reason I've decided that if I tell strangers that if they give me money, then I'll talk to them for an hour about myself, they'll think that's a good idea.

4. Any cunning plans to get more punters in?

I've based all my marketing stunts on Kenan & Kel plot-lines that never made it to air. I can't say too much about my main 'stunt' but let's just say I'll be doing a lot of flyering and putting a few posters up around my venue and the general Edinburgh area ;)

5. How much money do you think you'll lose/make this year?

This is pretty much the only press that I'm doing so it all hinges on how well this interview goes down really. From the sums I've done, if I'm not 80% full every day in my show then I'll have bailiffs coming to my flat pretty soon which is a shame because the only thing I own is Scalextric which isn't very valuable (and it smells funny if you're playing with it for too long), so fingers crossed the show's a success.

6. What's your weirdest past Fringe experience?

2 years ago I did a package show called The Comedy Zone and on one of the first nights I noticed a young girl, (maybe 8 years old or so), in a big puffy white dress standing at the back, which I thought was weird because it was an 18+ venue. It was very off-putting because she didn't laugh once and for some reason I was really cold on stage that night during my set. When I got off stage I asked the other acts if they had been distracted by her too but apparently they didn't notice her, and neither did any of the venue staff, which I think just goes to show how self-indulgent the festival can make some people at times. (although I certainly am guilty of that too at the best of times)

7. What other shows are you hoping to see?

Sean Mcloughlin, Mat Ewins, Rhys James, Phil Wang, Bearpit Podcast Podcast.

The list of things I'm going to see is very long and I'll forget most of it. But basically I'm going to see everyone who I'm friends with, who will have a go at me if I don't see their stupid shows.

8. If you took over programming a venue, what would you perfect line-up of comedians be?

Groucho Marx, Tommy Cooper, Mitch Hedberg, Steve Martin, Dermot McGaggle (props comedian from the Isle of Skye).

9. Name the one person you'd rather not bump into during the festival.

Any flyerer dressed as a chimney sweep or someone from WW2. I seem to attract them. Last year a guy dressed as an evacuee or something ran up to me, thrust a flyer in my face and said 'Urgent telegram sir! Scandal at the rationing office!' I became very scared and then he and a girl started singing a song about kissing in an Anderson shelter which made me even more distressed. I didn't have much of an appetite for dinner that evening, which I think massively affected my performance in that night's show.

10. Why should audiences pick your show over the 1,700+ other comedy offerings at this year's festival?

I honestly don't know, but if you want to see a guy trying his best and wearing a nicely ironed shirt then I'm the show for you!!

'Adam Hess: Salmon' is at 5:20pm at Heroes @ The Hive on 7-31 August. Listing