Dr Doom

Edit 2

A MAN ENTERS A DR SURGERY, DR DOOM IS SITTING IN THE DR'S CHAIR.

DR

Hello Mr Jones I'm the locum for tday. Take a seat or rather don't. Your hemarroids still bothering you?

MAN

Eek! Your Dr Doom the evil; half machine,super villain!

DR

Oh not today Mr Jones. Today I'm just filling in for Mr Patel.

MAN

Help! Police, army, Fantastic 4!

DR

Mr Jones will you please calm down. I've specially got you a nice donut shaped cushion.

MAN

That does look nice. It's an inflatable one isn't it?

SHOWS MR JONES THE CUSHION THEN PUTS IT ON A CHAIR.
MAN SITS ON IT.

MAN

Ooh what a relief. So you're no longer evil?

DR

Well when I was in prison I shared a cell with a Quaker called Peter. He was locked up for non violently protesting.

MAN

And he converted you to Quakerism?

DR

It's more complex. Quakers believe in identifying with the suffering of others in the way Jesus would have. I'm trying to attone for the evil caused by my Doom-bots and transdimensional technology

MAN

By working for 3 Rivers NHS Trust as a GP?

DR

Well yes, before becoming the evil overlord of Livonia I was a GP.

MAN

Gosh I feel quite embarassed. I'm sorry Dr you deserve a second chance. But my Farmer's they're agony.

DR

Well usually with the NHS you'd have to wait 3 months for laser surgery. But I think I can help you out today.

MAN

Oh thank you Dr, I'll just drop my pants then.

MAN DROPS HIS TROUSERS AND TURNS AROUND.
PULL BACK TO REVEAL A HUGE LASER CANNON HIDDEN POORLY BY A SHEET.
DR WHIPS OFF THE SHEET.

DR

Mu ha ha! Swollen bum grapes! Prepare to face the power of Dr Doom!

Isn't Doom from Latvaria?

There are parts of this sketch I liked but I wonder if it isn't too nerdy for the general populous.

Lines this this are punishingly long:

"It's more complex we Quakers, believe in identifying with the suffering of others in the way Jesus would have. Religious belief isn't really neccesary. I'm just trying to attone for some of the evil caused by my Doom-bots and transdimensional technology."

I think it would be better played straight too. Makes his sudden "mwa ha ha!" announcement funnier. So drop all the "farmers" and "bum grapes" business, it's all very Viz anyway.

Quote: David Bussell @ October 29 2008, 2:31 PM BST

Isn't Doom from Latvaria?

There are parts of this sketch I liked but I wonder if it isn't too nerdy for the general populous.

Lines this this are punishingly long:

"It's more complex we Quakers, believe in identifying with the suffering of others in the way Jesus would have. Religious belief isn't really neccesary. I'm just trying to attone for some of the evil caused by my Doom-bots and transdimensional technology."

I think it would be better played straight too. Makes his sudden "mwa ha ha!" announcement funnier. So drop all the "farmers" and "bum grapes" business, it's all very Viz anyway.

View original

Ditto.

Plus the grammar is somewhat difficult and at times misleading, such as:

"I tithe 40% of my age to Oxfam."

I know a Quaker called Peter. He's a good chap.

Quote: Winterlight @ October 29 2008, 2:36 PM BST

Ditto.

Plus the grammar is somewhat difficult and at times misleading, such as:

"I tithe 40% of my age to Oxfam."

View original

Well, it goes without saying that it's riddled with typos. That's Sootyj's stock in trade.

Thanks for the feedback, hope I got most of the typos.

Nerdy? Probably, but this was strictly for shits and giggles.