Below is some old dialogue I found from an old sitcom script. It's out of context but basically we have a scene following an argument where one character (Frank) has accused another (Steven) of being arrogant. It was meant to be derogratory but Steven actually rather likes it. A young woman (Julia) is also present.
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STEVEN: You shouldn't knock arrogance - it's a useful quality to have. It's a belief in yourself.
FRANK: Oh really. Let's have a look at the old Taurus shall we (picks up book from a shelf)
STEVEN: Tauraus is an astrological sign. The word you're searching for is Thesaurus. (snatches book out of Frank's hands)
FRANK: (starts singing) I am the eggman, they are the eggmen, I am Thesaurus.
STEVEN: (Flicks through book) Here we are: Arrogant...
FRANK: Goo-goo-ga-joob!.
STEVEN: Shut up (beat) Right, arrogant...aloof, bossy, conceited, disdainful, egotistic, insolent, know-it-all, overbearing, pompous, self-important, smug, (turns page) snooty, snotty, stuck up, uppity and vain.
FRANK: ...or as I prefer: A git.
STEVEN: Interesting. (Beat) That could be Neil Peters CV.
JULIA: Aww, What have you got against Neil? He's lovely.
STEVEN: Lovely? He's shagging my wife!
JULIA: But your separated from Selina now. Life goes on. There's plenty more fish in the sea.
STEVEN: Well, he's just too darn perfect isn't he. He has the money, the looks, he's as fit as Linford Christie at his peak with a todger to match, no doubt.
FRANK: Basically, everything you're not.
STEVEN: Look, my underpants aint that roomy - I've had no complaints.
JULIA: But women want more in a man
STEVEN: Are we still talking in terms of inches here or are we going deeper...actually that sounds worse.
FRANK: Life's one long double entendre to you isn't it?
STEVEN: Long? Double entry? Hark who's talking
FRANK: Innuendo then.
STEVEN: In your end - Oooo! You can't help it can you - you're no better than me.
FRANK: Right, that's it. I'm going home.
There's a pause while Steven considers if the sentence has another sexual reference.
STEVEN: You see? You can do it.
FRANK: Bugger off!
STEVEN: Sorry, that was another one.
Frank exits slamming the door.
