GRAMS SOUND OF TYPING
MAN
Dear Mr Tanaka I am the head of office supplies at...
GRAMS LOUD BEEP
COMPUTER
Hello I am 2nd chance, the new e-mail checker. Have you been drinking?
Type 1 for yes, 2 for no.
MAN
No, stupid program.
COMPUTER
Are you sure? Question 1, spell cat.
MAN(TYPING)
C a t.
COMPUTER
Well done. Question 2. Am I your best mate? Type 1 for yes, type 2 for no.
MAN(TYPING)
2, bloody stupid time wasting computer.
COMPUTER
But why? I think you're great, I thought we were mates. Question 3
You think I've got a drink problem don't you?
Type 1 for yes type 2 for no.
MAN(TYPING)
2, no I think you're a ruddy virus.
COMPUTER
Yes you do. You're all talking about me aren't you? The spreadsheet, Outlook express, even even Word for Windows. You've all got in for me. You've got a real attitude, don't you? You dick. Type 1 for yes type 2 for no.
MAN(TYPING)
2 you bloody time waster. I am getting you wiped off my hard disk pronto.
COMPUTER
Well 2 can play at that game. Say good bye to this years sales figures, it's wiping time!
MAN
You total silicon chip on my shoulder. I've had it with you!
GRAMS
SOUND OF COMPUTER BEING VIOLENTLY DESTROYED.
MAN
Ha gotcha, not so clever with your screen caved in.
BOSS
Jeffrey what have you done? Are you drunk?
