Inlaws - just for fun.

EXT: GARDEN. - DAY

A LARGE SUBURBAN GARDEN, SARAH IS INTRODUCING JON TO HER FAMILY.

SARAH
My mum.

JON
Nice to meet you Mrs….

MUM
Call me Violet.

SARAH
This is my dad.

JON
Very pleased to meet you.

DAD
What is it you do exactly?

SARAH
Dad.

GABBY
You must be Jon. Yum yum.

SARAH
Excuse her…. She's... a mental.

SARAH TAKES JOHN TO ONE SIDE. FOR THE FIRST TIME WE NOTICE THE PEOPLE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE GARDEN. THEY ARE 20FT TALL WITH LONG ARMS AND GANGLY LEGS, PLAYING VOLLEYBALL.

SARAH
Sorry about them. Pretty daunting.

JON
Who are they?.

JON POINTS TO THE VOLLEY BALL GAME.

SARAH
O, they're my extended family.

Not bad, i had a bit of a smile from it.

*howls*

Like it

The she's a mental line seems pointless, like the second half though.

Yeah, nice idea. What Sooty said - you could cut about half the lines.

EXT: GARDEN. - DAY

A LARGE SUBURBAN GARDEN, SARAH IS INTRODUCING JON TO HER FAMILY.

SARAH
This is my mum & dad.

JON
Very pleased to meet you.

FOR THE FIRST TIME WE NOTICE THE PEOPLE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE GARDEN. THEY ARE 20FT TALL WITH LONG ARMS AND GANGLY LEGS, PLAYING VOLLEYBALL.

JON
Who are they?.

JON POINTS TO THE VOLLEY BALL GAME.

SARAH
Oh, they're my extended family.

Haha - very funny. I preferred the shorter edit though.