British Comedy Guide

Status report Page 6,124

Quote: chipolata @ 27th March 2022, 11:23 AM

It's how we always used to post on this thread. Chappers should know that.

I thought it was only always Ben.

I'm wondering why suddenly top politicians, when asked, will not give an answer to 'what defines a woman?'
It stumps them - Starmer even said he's not a biologist.
Is it because they think it's a loaded question?

When I was a lad there was the odd transvestite knocking about. It was comical at first then it was more of 'whatever floats ya boat mate'
It's nothing new - we even had a mate that played with us wearing his mothers dress and shoes.

The word transvestite seems to have gone out of the window though, to be renamed transsexual and everyone now has to collude in the illusion that they are biological women. Once again 'whatever floats ya boat mate' But to me, it's getting sinister. Some are entering female sports and wiping the floor with them, they enter female only changing rooms etc and real women's rights are becoming second to these people.

I might even be arrested for writing this, that's how sinister it is.

I doubt the desk sergeant at Huddersfield police station is going to interrupt his tea and toast to send a copper out to nab you Stephen. I admit the sexual orientation is complex. But live and let seems to cover the blanks in my knowledge.
These people are probably 00000.1 of the populace yet they seem to get 85% of the stick? Let them be mate its not like they're not stealing your rhubarb is it?

Is anyone else collecting the 52 piece farm set in the cereal packets?

I have got just four to go to complete mine - the milkmaid, the effluent tank, the track which leads to the village and the llama.

A lot of duplicates of course so let me know if you want to do swapses.

The trouble is, Trans rights is something that needs discussing sensibly and soberly.
But sadly both sides have made the argument too toxic.
A very vociferous minority are unwittingly (or stupidly) letting themselves be used as pawns in the "Anti-Woke" agenda - much to the delight of those reaping the benefits of these manufactured 'culture wars'.
Thin end of the wedge-ism at it's most egregious.
The problems are solvable If people just calm down.
Not much chance of that though.

Quote: Lazzard @ 29th March 2022, 9:32 AM

The trouble is, Trans rights is something that needs discussing sensibly and soberly.
But sadly both sides have made the argument too toxic.
A very vociferous minority are unwittingly (or stupidly) letting themselves be used as pawns in the "Anti-Woke" agenda - much to the delight of those reaping the benefits of these manufactured 'culture wars'.
Thin end of the wedge-ism at it's most egregious.
The problems are solvable If people just calm down.
Not much chance of that though.

One of the interesting things about the Ukraine war is that for a while we forgot about the toxic culture wars and just concentrated on a genuine news story. Sadly it didn't take long for us to revert to the normal Punch and Judy show.

Quote: chipolata @ 29th March 2022, 10:12 AM

Sadly it didn't take long for us to revert to the normal Punch and Judy show.

Taking of which, those Partygate results are in!

Is anyone else collecting the 36 coins on fracking from a well known chain of petrol garages?

I have got just four to go to complete mine - the nodding donkey, the three mile line of water trucks, the council house collapsing in an earthquake and Caroline Lucas in handcuffs being carted off by the police.

A lot of duplicates of course so let me know if you want to do swapses.

Quote: Lazzard @ 29th March 2022, 10:15 AM

Taking of which, those Partygate results are in!

Boris was right to sing 'I will survive' to whoever he sang it to.

I have always loved the sets of 22 cards in the little monkeys tea.

Do you know the piano's on my foot? You hum it son, I'll play it.

I've got the full collections of Great British Birds, Famous People and History of the Motor Car.

But I am four cards short on the latest series - "Things You Will Die From So Make Your Will Out NOW To These Good Causes"

Let me see.

Yes - all I need with this one is lassa fever, ingrowing toenails, bubonic plague and nuclear armageddon.

I don't suppose many people have the same hobbies as me.

But I have a lot of duplicates of course so if you do let me know if you want to arrange swapses.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 29th March 2022, 8:46 AM

Is anyone else collecting the 52 piece farm set in the cereal packets?

I have got just four to go to complete mine - the milkmaid, the effluent tank, the track which leads to the village and the llama.

A lot of duplicates of course so let me know if you want to do swapses.

The only one I'm missing is the trumpet player.

Of course, if you break the end off the trombone, it will look like a trumpet.

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 29th March 2022, 6:15 PM

The only one I'm missing is the trumpet player.

Of course, if you break the end off the trombone, it will look like a trumpet.

I've got a spare one of the trumpet player - he's wearing dungarees and gumboots and is standing in a field of mountain goats - so as soon as you get one I need as indicated on my list just let me know and we can swapsy.

As a matter of interest, have you bought 20 Bensons recently? If you have, you will no doubt like me be collecting their 47 piece set of Doom and Gloom miniature gnomes. I have only four more to get.

Granny gnome gets hypothermia because of her energy bills, football oilgarch gnome has suffered chocolate bar poisoning, eskimo gnome falls to his death in a final cracking of the North Pole and God gnome turns up unexpectedly in Peckham to say "I told you the book of Revelations was true - bruv, I'm well dingy, innit".

Uncannily yet again I of course have a lot of duplicates so do let me know with this one too if you are a man I can do business with.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 29th March 2022, 8:44 PM

As a matter of interest, have you bought 20 Bensons recently? If you have, you will no doubt like me be collecting their 47 piece set of Doom and Gloom miniature gnomes. I have only four more to get.

Granny gnome gets hypothermia because of her energy bills, football oilgarch gnome has suffered chocolate bar poisoning, eskimo gnome falls to his death in a final cracking of the North Pole and God gnome turns up unexpectedly in Peckham to say "I told you the book of Revelations was true - bruv, I'm well dingy, innit".

Uncannily yet again I of course have a lot of duplicates so do let me know with this one too if you are a man I can do business with.

The only gnome I have is from Dulwich.

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 30th March 2022, 10:40 AM

The only gnome I have is from Dulwich.

They are worth a bit of money now.

The Dulwich ones.

Billy Bunting - I am liking the little Angels wireless station. It is a nice bit of escapism. My favourite presenter is Roy Beagle.

Just finished grinding and mixing 17 pounds of sausage (Irish, and Nurnberg bratwurst) and started curing 9 pounds of bacon. I'll stuff the sausages tomorrow and smoke the bacon in a week. Tomorrow I have to put 10 gallons of dark mild in kegs.

Thank your local butcher and brewer the next time you see them, it's hard work.

Hope you're all doing well!

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