Last week I was sent an email with the subject line 'How ugly guys can get chicks'. Today I receive one that says, "You have been chosen to represent your industry in the next 2014 Top Professional Magazine".
Spammers certainly like to mess with your head...
Perhaps you're an ugly top prefessional?
I'm trying to work whilst watching Kojak, but they keep shouting.
Is there anyone I can complain to?
Just wondered over into the Skit Comp... no entries this week so far! Well apart from my own. What's going on?
I just accidentally got in a massive Taikwondo fight with a pair of fashionable topman trousers.
I went to make a cup of tea and the trousers cornered me in the cloakroom for no reason and started going all mental and throwing punches into my face area and unfounded accusations towards my navel which hurt my feelings more than anything else. I undid his zip which threw him off guard a bit and then I just concentrated on jabbing him in the turn-ups which just seemed to enrage him more. He got the better of me, I thought I was a goner and he had me pinned down and out of the corner of my eye I could see a coat hanger. As soon as I grabbed it he backed off and I could see he was absolutely petrified of the coat hanger. I finally managed to trap him in the corner and folded him up neatly and put him on the coat hanger and hung him up with all the coats.
Remember: If you ever get in fisticuffs with some trousers or just one particular trouser, always remember that a well brandished coat-hanger will completely pacify them. It could save your life one day.
Quote: Lee @ 27th January 2014, 4:13 PM GMTJust wondered over into the Skit Comp... no entries this week so far! Well apart from my own. What's going on?
I gave up when I started getting zero votes, no problem I'm not everyones cup of tea
But when I was losing out to ancient not very good jokes, rewritten as skits, it felt a little demeaning.
It's abit like going into critique and there's some bollocks skit, with 30 posts having a daft argument about some feature.
Whilst some really good stuff in critique gets nothing.
Just my opinion.
Quote: sootyj @ 27th January 2014, 6:04 PM GMTBut when I was losing out to ancient not very good jokes, rewritten as skits, it felt a little demeaning.
The clique strikes again!
Quote: sootyj @ 27th January 2014, 6:04 PM GMTI gave up when I started getting zero votes, no problem I'm not everyones cup of tea
Wut?
Zero votes ?
Them dudes be bat shit crazy bro
You da man big guy
You da main MAIN maaaan
Man yo is one funny as f**k badaaaass motherfu...
Oh I've gone all gangster again
How terribly embarrassing
It's the pot noodles Lofty, first you get the pot noodles, then you get the power then you get diarea.
Fo'sho
Init?
*sits through boring film just to see a few moments of Cumberbatch*
*feels it might not be worth it*
Quote: zooo @ 27th January 2014, 9:17 PM GMT*sits through boring film just to see a few moments of Cumberbatch*
You're a female George Roper.
Whose your dream lady
Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 27th January 2014, 9:27 PM GMTa female George Roper.
aint love grand
Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 27th January 2014, 9:27 PM GMTYou're a female George Roper.
Hardly, both my hands are on the keyboard thank you very f**king much.
Haha!
George 'sticky fingers' Roper as he's known