Status report Page 5,320

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ September 30 2013, 1:02 PM BST

Son of a gun! We want pictures...!

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Image rights are not for sale.

Talk about bust and boom - just had a letter about the accident claim from a couple of years ago and I'm due a pretty tidy sum. Still uncomfortable about about the process involved but the kids will have good start to adult life when they reach 18.

Quote: AndyGilder @ September 30 2013, 1:22 PM BST

Akin to my mother in law, who complained (not just to me or the rest of the people around the table, but to the waiting staff) that her chorizo and prawn risotto was "too fishy".

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Not quite the same thing but I remember being in a Little Chef with my parents and the very polite waitress asked my dad if he wanted tea or coffee to which he replied, "I'll have tea because your coffee is bloody awful"

Made me laugh anyway.

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ September 29 2013, 4:16 PM BST

Jennie, if ever you find yourself in Yorkshire one Sunday, give me a call. You being a honourary daughter are welcome to join us at home or at the pub for a five star boozy Sunday dinner.

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I will take you up on that.

I love my life, but Sunday is the one day when I wish I had my family nearby for a proper Sunday roast, complete with slightly tipsy discussions and arguments over washing up.

Tuumble, how are things going with the new woman? I hope it has pissed your wife off royally. Congrats on the payout!

Things are going very well indeed Jennie. The family went to the coast yesterday and me and yhe ex literally 'drew a line' in the sand and dated it to say we've cut ties with the past. We vowed to remain friends. The day before news broke of my new clinch which ultimately made yesterday's line more symbolic. The ex and me had once last hug for the road and the plan is for me to finally move out on the 25th once the tenancy is signed over.

Aww, that's sweet. You are significantly more mature than me. I'd be on the Jeremy Kyle Show within a week of breaking up, demanding lie detector tests and sending abusive messages via Facebook.

Question is would you do the same at work?

Robyn is very tired. A very busy bee!

Chip's just nipped out to the post office but it's shut for auditing. Whatever that means.

Think I'll be entering the Musical Cmedy Awards again, which means my guitar and I will likely be in London again in the new year. Drinks?

indeedy, if you're not too famous to hang out with us by then.

I can't promise anything.

I'll settle for pushing my nose up against the window.

Eurgh, get your pleb nose off that window. Famouses only.

Got a local radio interview in a couple of hours and really bad cramps. This is going to be fun.

Doesn't make a joke about well known popular beat combo the cramps.

Well done!

How much should one charge for a short story (15000-20000 words) I keep getting offered them. I think about £400, but could probably get £250.

20,000? That's pretty long for a short story, it's a third of a short novel. Charge lots.

So it's more a novella, how long would you say a short story is?

Also it's kinda quick and nasty.