British Comedy Guide

Cuba defector.

FIDEL CASTRO IS TALKING TO A SOLDIER.

SOLDIER

El presidente, the defector problem in Cuba is out of control.

CASTRO

Acchh it is to be expected, we have no western luxuries to offer our poor people. All we can offer is a little rice, a hovel to live in and a tiny pension.

SOLDIER

No presidente it's not our people sneaking out, it's Americans sneaking in.
It's got so serious president Bush wants to speak to you (BEAT) in person.

CASTRO

Oh this is it Manuel, that crazy Bush is going to invade us and turn the whole of Cuba in Guantanomo bay. I'll look shit in a naked pyramid.

BUSH WALKS ON.

BUSH

I have one thing to say to you El presidente Castro.

DROPS TO KNEES

Give me assylum please, please when Joe 6 pack finds out Ole George pissed the whole economy up the wall, he's gonna be doin' the ole Sadam shuffle.

CASTRO

No, we in Cuba are delighted to take any one with useful skills.

GEORGE

George could no, or George could....fine can I get a flight to North Korea from here.

Share this page