F/X:FOOTSTEPS RUNNING DOWN A CHURCH AISLE
FRANK:Hi Susan, you look pretty?
NIGEL:Quiet the blushing bride.
SUSAN:Thanks, where's Terry..
FRANK:You mean...
SUSAN:Terry the groom...
NIGEL:Ah that Terry, is he not with you?
SUSAN
f course not, you HAVE seen him today.
FRANK:Not today exactly.
NIGEL:But he was quiet safe when we left him..
FRANK:Apart from...
NIGEL:Well he may have been chained to a Bengal Tiger..
SUSAN:What? You went to the Zoo for the stag night?
NIGEL:No of course not... thats just silly...
FRANK:We went to the curry house in town.
SUSAN:Where did the tiger come from?
NIGELh that came from the Zoo...
SUSAN:And how did you get your hands on the tiger?
FRANK
omething involving cheese slices I think, my memory is very hazy, I
was a bit drunk.
NIGEL:I can vouch for that, he vomited on a penguin.
SUSAN:And who's idea was it to do this to your best friend?
FRANK:I bought the handcuffs, but I only suggested a lamppost then you know how it goes with games off one upman ship when we've had a few jars...
NIGEL:Until I thought of a Tiger...
SUSAN o it is your fault that my groom to be is currently chained to a vicious man eating big cat?
NIGEL:He'll be fine... He was unconscious when we left him...
SUSAN:But how do you know the tiger won't wake up...
FRANK:Ah no I mean Terry was unconscious...
SUSAN:That's worse surely?
NIGEL:Hmmm... (BEAT) I suppose so...
FRANK:We've all seen the films he'll come dashing through those doors in a minute, wearing a tigerskin rug with an amusing tale for the after dinner speeches
AWKWARD PAUSE
FRANK:Maybe I should start phoning the hospitals
END
