Writing a phone call

I'm currently writing a phone call in one of my scripts. I want to do it so we can only see and hear one person on the call and from his reponses we can assume what the other person is saying.

I've been doing it like this:

Mike:
(On Phone) Hello......oh hi.......no not yet, have you? (Laughs) No problem, will Sam be there?

The above is something I just completely made up and isn't an extract from anything, but just wondering if the general idea is right?

Thanks.

Quote: Mike Dan-Carter @ October 8 2008, 3:04 PM BST

I'm currently writing a phone call in one of my scripts. I want to do it so we can only see and hear one person on the call and from his reponses we can assume what the other person is saying.

I've been doing it like this:

Mike:
(On Phone) Hello......oh hi.......no not yet, have you? (Laughs) No problem, will Sam be there?

The above is something I just completely made up and isn't an extract from anything, but just wondering if the general idea is right?

Thanks.

View original

That's fine.

Thanks

Yeah I would write it as:

Mike:
(On Phone)
Hello, oh hi, no not yet, have you? (Laughs) No problem, will Sam be there?

As long as it's clear what you mean.

But while we're on that topic, I have a similar question and there's no point in opening up a new thread.
In a phone conversation, if you want one person to only be heard and not seen would you put O.S for off screen?

How Mike did it was better Zuhaib, and you can use O.O.V. or V/O

Yeah that's what I've been thinking, ... seems more clear than a comma

The elipses make it clear he is listening to someone else speak, that is to say pausing. The commas make it all one speech.