1
SARAH (VICE PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE FOR MCCAIN) IS TALKING TO AN ADVISER.
SARAH
I've only met Senator McCain once, I hope he didn't pick me as running mate because a woman would make him look trendy.
ADVISER
That's not the reason.
MCCAIN WALKS ON TROUSERS DOWN (OR IN THE NUDE).
MCCAIN
I've had my Ovaltine and viagra, now for my Horlicks.
ADVISER
He shags a milf like you, and no one'll think he's to old.
SARAH IS TALKING TO AN ADVISER.
SARAH
I only met John McCain once I hope he didn't choose me as his running mate to get the mommy vote.
ADVISER
No, but your mommy skills may come in handy.
JOHN MCCAIN WALKS ON HOLDING HIS ASS.
JOHN
Mommy Sarah I just lost my deposit in the southern states, can you change my daiper?
SARAH
Well atleast this president isn't full of shit.
3
JOE BIDDEN IS TALKING TO BARACK.
JOE
Barack you didn't just choose me a white guy, as your running mate to make white bigots happy?
BARACK
No, now practice your speach Boe.
JOE
It's Joe.
BARACK
You sure? Boe sounds whiter.
JOE
Gimme that speech(READING) I Joe Bidden hate all rap music excpet Vanilla Ice, I like my bread white, and my favourite island is the Isle of White. I can't read this.
BARACK
You're right, you forgot your hat.
HANDS JOE A KKK HOOD.
4
JOE BIDDEN IS TALKING TO BARACK OBAMA.
BARACK
Now Joe you haven't been ripping off any more Neil Kinnock speaches have you?
JOE
Nope, I promise I haven't plagarised any British socialist MPs.
BARACK
Good, lets hear your new speech.
JOE GETS ON ALL FOURS AND LIKE A CAT, STARTS SNIFFING BARACK.
JOE
Meow I'm a naughty pussy cat Mr Hussein.
GEORGE GALLOWAY WALKS ON.
GEORGE
You cheaky bastard, you've got even less respect than me.
