British Comedy Guide

Milestone posts Page 84

Quote: Kenneth @ September 13 2009, 5:12 AM BST

Is that bad? I knew a woman whose husband could NEVER bring her to orgasm - she said he was useless in bed and always came really quickly - so she bought herself a vibrator to compensate for her husband's shortcomings. One day the husband found the vibrator and was furious - regarded it as a massive insult to his masculinity and threw it away. So the woman then embarked on an affair with a guy named Kenneth in order to achieve sexual satisfaction. True story.

I never understood why some guys get upset if a woman has a sex toy. Surely having a piece of rubber or plastic with batteries is better than having a well oiled bit on the side called Hoyt. Same with guys who have a secret stash of porn. The only time you have to be worried is if there is an excessive amount or they are a bit grugesome, i.e Rubber wellies weekly or a cupboard full of chainmail dildos.

Shut up Roo.

Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ September 13 2009, 1:17 PM BST

Rubber wellies weekly

Ah, you're a fan too?

I want my shoes back by the way Leevil.

When I've finished.

Finished!

Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ September 13 2009, 1:17 PM BST

I never understood why some guys get upset if a woman has a sex toy. Surely having a piece of rubber or plastic with batteries is better than having a well oiled bit on the side called Hoyt. Same with guys who have a secret stash of porn. The only time you have to be worried s if there is an excessive amount or they are a bit grugesome, i.e Rubber wellies weekly or a cupboard full of chainmail dildos.

A bit different there, Ruby. The man's partner could quite easily give him a handjob, but I'm yet to hear of a man whose penis twists and vibrates at high speed. The argument that plastic is better than another man is missing the point of the man's objection entirely.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ September 13 2009, 1:05 PM BST

Isn't this a plot for a porno film?

It gets better. The adulterous woman (she whose husband threw away her vibrator) was also sexually interested in women and the possibility of threesomes, but her husband was mortified by this and said it was unnatural. Thus she turned to Kenneth to introduce her to an agreeable bisexual woman. Happy days.

:O

Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ September 13 2009, 1:17 PM BST

The only time you have to be worried is if there is an excessive amount

Errr

Quote: Kenneth @ September 13 2009, 1:39 PM BST

It gets better. The adulterous woman (she whose husband threw away her vibrator) was also sexually interested in women and the possibility of threesomes, but her husband was mortified by this and said it was unnatural. Thus she turned to Kenneth to introduce her to an agreeable bisexual woman. Happy days.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ September 13 2009, 1:05 PM BST

Isn't this a plot for a porno film?

Sounds more like one of those letters in wank mags.

Quote: Aaron @ September 13 2009, 1:36 PM BST

A bit different there, Ruby. The man's partner could quite easily give him a handjob, but I'm yet to hear of a man whose penis twists and vibrates at high speed. The argument that plastic is better than another man is missing the point of the man's objection entirely.

It's common knowledge that a lot of women find it difficult to achieve orgasm through intercourse. It's nothing to do with the man's performance, it's biological fact. Sorry if this sounds sexist but men just don't have the same problem. Womens privates parts are a lot more compilcated and made worse by the fact that every woman reacts differently to different things. Granted, if there is a problem, she should address it rather than hide it as it's only fair to both of them, I will give you that.

Quote: Nil Putters @ September 13 2009, 1:43 PM BST

Errr

I'm talking like a shelving unit of filth, Nil!

Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ September 13 2009, 1:52 PM BST

It's common knowledge that a lot of women find it difficult to achieve orgasm through intercourse. It's nothing to do with the man's performance, it's biological fact. Sorry if this sounds sexist but men just don't have the same problem. Womens privates parts are a lot more compilcated and made worse by the fact that every woman reacts differently to different things. Granted, if there is a problem, she should address it rather than hide it as it's only fair to both of them, I will give you that.

Do they? Can't say I've noticed...or cared. ;)

Yeah, and that will be why you are known as Wee Willy all Thumbs.

Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ September 13 2009, 1:52 PM BST

I'm talking like a shelving unit of filth, Nil!

Errr

Laughing out loud

Share this page