A MAN IS TALKING TO HIS WIFE, WHILST READING THE POST.
MAN
Look dear it's the water, electric, and gas bills.
WOMAN
How much are the bastards charging us for life's essentials now.
MAN
Ooh less than usual. Hang on here's a new one, British Oxygen board 200 quid?
WOMAN
Well the airs free I'm not paying.
SOUND OF SUCKING LIKE A GIANT VACUMN CLEANER THEY FALL TO THE GROUND.
MAN
I think we will.
BARRACK OBAMA IS GIVING A SPEECH.
My fellow American's people have said I am a terrorist, a Muslim, and as a black man untrustworthy to run the US. Well it's all true ! I love Bin Laden, I kidnapped Maddy McCann, where's the white women, and the cocaine? I' a crazy nigger America, I've got a knife and I will cut you America.
ADVISER
What the hell are you saying Mr Obama?
BARRACK
Have you read the news, the oils running out, Putin's going to war, and the planets about to boil? I don't want to be president of this mess. I figure I convince American I'm a drug crazed, criminal, retard they'll never vote for me.
GEORGE BUSH WALKS ON.
GEORGE
That's what I thought, but the dumb sons a bitches voted for me twice.
NATO
A WOMAN IS ON THE PHONE.
WOMAN
Hello this is NATO defending your freedom since 1953, how can I help you?
PAUSE
President Sakavishi you want to know if Georgia’s of NATO has been processed?
I’m afraid not.
PAUSE
I’m not sure we received your cheque.
PAUSE
Well there’s no need for that kind of language. I don’t care if 1000s of Russian tanks are crossing your border.
PAUSE
Well we’ll return your peace keepers. You can write to Watchdog if you like, but it didn’t do Hungary, Czeklovakia, Poland, Ukraine, Lithuania much good.