INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY
MUM AND DAD ARE SITTING ON SOFA.
DAD:
Suppose we'd better get it over with.
MUM:
Suppose so.
MUM STANDS UP, STICKS HEAD OUT OF DOOR.
MUM:
Sophie! Jack! Can you come in, please?
DAD STANDS UP, SITS IN ARMCHAIR. MUM SITS ON DINING CHAIR NEXT TO HIM.
SOPHIE AND JACK COME IN. PLEASANT LOOKING CHILDREN, SOPHIE IS FIVE, PUSHING JACK, SIX MONTHS, IN HIS PRAM.
DAD:
Take a seat.
SOPHIE SITS ON SOFA.
DAD:
Now, as you know, times have been tough for the Jenkins family in recent months, what with the credit crunch and so on, and let me tell you now, this has been a very difficult decision for Mrs Jenkins and I to take, but I'm afraid the family is going to have to undergo a fundamental restructure.
SOPHIE:
What does that mean?
DAD:
We're going to have to let you go.
SOPHIE:
What? Daddy?
DAD:
Mr Jenkins. I don't think 'Daddy' is appropriate in the circumstances.
MUM:
It's no reflection on your schoolwork, which has been marvellous. But the fact remains that you bring in very little revenue.
SOPHIE:
But...
DAD:
This can't come as a surprise. After we let go of the nanny, you must have realised the writing was on the wall.
MUM:
We will give you an excellent reference, and two weeks' pocket money. We're sure you'll find parents elsewhere and soon.
SOPHIE:
But...
TWO MEN IN UNIFORM WALK IN.
DAD:
Now we'll give you time to pack your things. Then these two gentlemen will escort you off the premises.
MEN TAKE CHILDREN OUT OF ROOM
MUM:
So, when do the Lithuanian children start again?
DAD:
Monday. We won't regret this, Jane. They'll tidy their rooms, do the washing-up, clean the car. And for 50% less pocket money. Cheaper than outsourcing to Indian children.
JACK AND SOPHIE APPEAR AT DOOR. SOPHIE'S CARRYING A CARDBOARD BOX FULL OF TOYS. JACK HAS AN OLD TEDDY BEAR WITH HIM IN HIS PRAM.
THEN MUM LEAPS OUT OF HER SEAT.
MUM:
No! It's not right!
SOPHIE BEAMS.
MUM RUSHES OVER TO THE CHILDREN, PAUSES IN FRONT OF THEM, THEN YANKS THE TEDDY OUT OF THE PRAM.
MUM:
(ANNOYED) I think you'll find Mr Snuffles is a family asset.
MEN BUNDLE CHILDREN OUT OF HOUSE.
END.