British Comedy Guide

Top Secret

SCENE: A CAFE.

A MAN OF INDETERMINATE ETHNIC ORIGIN IS AT A TABLE DRINKING AN EXPRESSO. A MAN IN A SUIT, CARRYING AN ATTACHE CASE, ENTERS AND SITS AT THE SAME TABLE.

MAN IN A SUIT

You're Yusuf?

ETHNIC MAN

I'm Yusuf. You have the plans?

MAN IN A SUIT

Yes. And the price? As agreed?

ETHNIC MAN

As agreed.

THE MAN IN THE SUIT PLACES HIS ATTACHE CASE ON THE TABLE AND OPENS IT. HE LOOKS PUZZLED, THEN CONCERNED, THEN HE BEGINS FRANTICALLY RIFLING THROUGH THE CASE.

MAN IN A SUIT.

F**k!! I've left them on the train.

ENDS.

Lovely twist, send it out there.

Yes - good - although I was expecting something about mine and Nick Rivers favourite film.

Quote: sootyj @ June 26 2008, 9:32 PM BST

Lovely twist, send it out there.

Not past its topical sell-by date?

Quote: David Chapman @ June 26 2008, 10:08 PM BST

Yes - good - although I was expecting something about mine and Nick Rivers favourite film.

Que?

Quote: Timbo @ June 26 2008, 10:17 PM BST

Que?

Latrine?

Quote: David Chapman @ June 26 2008, 10:18 PM BST

Latrine?

Turnip?

Quote: Timbo @ June 26 2008, 10:38 PM BST

Turnip?

I don't think he was in it.

Quote: David Chapman @ June 26 2008, 10:49 PM BST

I don't think he was in it.

Oh, that's cleared that one up then.

The film Top Secret was by the Naked Gun people I think. Brilliant parodies of all sorts of things!

Aha! I am with you!

Yes, a very good film.

And many happy returns. (I was beginning to wonder if you had not over-celebrated.)

Thanks - it has probably seemed like that ever since I've been here.

Topsecret was awful! This is great, and it's funny enough not to date too much.

Very good, and dont worry about it being past it's sell by date, more top secret paperwork will be lost or mislaid anyday now I'm sure;)

Quote: sootyj @ June 27 2008, 6:53 AM BST

Topsecret was awful! This is great, and it's funny enough not to date too much.

Scientists have proven you 95% wrong in this regard. Skeet shooting? The backwards scene in the Swedish book shop? The underwater fight? There are so many classic scenes in that movie that the duffers just sail by.

PS. Nice sketch, Timbo. Might be a bit past it's sell by date but you only have to wait for the next fiasco and adapt it slightly.

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