Queen Elizabeth 2nd

THE QUEEN IS TALKING TO A SAILOR, WHILST PRINCE PHILIP STANDS BY.

QUEEN

And what do you do, little man?

SAILOR

I'm the longest serving sailor on the Queen Elizabeth 2nd, 55 proud years Ma'am sleeping on board. She may have rust and barnacles on her vast bottom, she may smell of fish, but she's all mine.

PHILIP

At least you're not expected to f**k her.

This month I 'ave been mostly writing about the Queen's sex-life.

Edited by Aaron.

PRINCE PHIL IS TALKING TO A SAILOR.

PHIL

And what do you do, little man?

SAILOR

I'm the longest serving sailor on the Queen Elizabeth 2nd, 55 proud years Ma'am sleeping on board. She may have rust and barnacles on her vast bottom, she may smell of fish, but she's all mine.

PHILIP

At least you're not expected to f**k her.

This month I 'ave been mostly writing about the Queen's sex-life.

FANTASTIC!

Yes, I like this too, but I wonder if you need the Queen. Couldn't Philip ask the first question too? It would simplify the sketch and make it more credible that he'd make the final comment.

Like John's suggestion. That works much better.

Yes. Go with John's idea. It's a bit broad for my tastes, but if NR don't buy it i'll be quite surprised.

It's changed ! It'll be competing with my other Queen Liz sex skit, should I be worried?

But if you're changing it to Philip speaking, then probably best to change the "Ma'am" in the Sailor's speech too!