Cold Hands Sketch

Here's one I wrote ages back. I did actually post it up on BSG for about 1/2 an hour last year, but then took it down to re-edit.

This time it stays!

Ext. High Street

Close up shot of a man and woman walking down the street. The man raises his hands to his mouth and blows in them to keep warm.

Man: It's so cold.

Camera shot changes to show the back of the couple.

Man: I wish I'd brought my gloves.

Camera pulls out to reveal that the man is wearing nothing from the waist down.

END

If I was submitting this to a producer though, would it be best to not mention my proposed camera directions? I guess I just worry that people won't get it otherwise.

I like it.

I would imagine that - when the joke is a pull back/reveal like this and the camera angles are important to the gag - the producer probably won't mind. You only need the third camera direction anyway (the pull back) so perhaps that's the only one you should leave in there.

Yes, there is a laugh there, and I agree with Afinkawan on the camera directions.

Liked it then, like it now.

The problem of camera direction is a toughie. Though it's still not ideal, I'd retool it slightly to avoid the use of the word 'camera'. Something like, 'We pull back to reveal....'

That said, adding 'we' in that 'we see' way, is often just as maligned a technique.