British Comedy Guide

Balloon Race Quickie

EXT. - "CHURCH OF ALL OUR SOULS - GRAND ANNUAL FETE" - DAY

A BALLOON RACE STALL. CHILDREN WITH THEIR PARENTS, QUEUING UP TO PUT THEIR DETAILS ON CARDS AND SEND THEM OFF ATTACHED TO BALLOONS.

FIRST THIN KID - EGGED ON BY PARENT - RELEASES HIS BALLOON AND IT FLOATS OFF.

SECOND THIN KID QUICKLY FOLLOWS SUIT AND WAVES THE BALLOON ON ITS WAY.

FAT KID REACHES HIS TURN. HE TURNS TO HIS PARENTS FOR ENCOURAGEMENT AND THEY NOD HIM ALONG. HE RELEASES THE BALLOON AND IT DROPS TO THE GROUND WITH A HEAVY THUD. FAT KID BURSTS INTO TEARS.

END.

Ah bless, poor fat kid.

cruel but funny :)

Haha, I like this one. It's one of those you have to picture to get the full effect rather than just read.

Yep, good one.

Am I missing something here?

I question this, because at the moment it just seems as though the punchline is "The fat kid suffers for being fat". Unless, as I said, I may be missing something.

Could be an ultimate nasty skit?

Maybe there's a black kid, and his balloon gets stabbed?
Or a boyscout, and a big paedo jumps out the bushes and shags his balloon.
Or a disabled kid, and an evil looking Dr jabs him with a poisoned needle killing him, then uses it to deflate his balloon. Then pisses on the dead kid, and his flat balloon?

Maybe a sad balloon floating above an Austrian cellar?

Quote: sootyj @ May 27 2008, 9:51 PM BST

Could be an ultimate nasty skit?

Maybe there's a black kid, and his balloon gets stabbed?
Or a boyscout, and a big paedo jumps out the bushes and shags his balloon.
Or a disabled kid, and an evil looking Dr jabs him with a poisoned needle killing him, then uses it to deflate his balloon. Then pisses on the dead kid, and his flat balloon?

Maybe a sad balloon floating above an Austrian cellar?

Or a shed load of balloons bearing the Polish flag appear.

Why the Polish flag?

There's been quite a large influx of Polish over recent times.

Oh very clever and racist and funny.

Maybe loads of home made gypsy balloons, whilst the gypsy's shoot the other kids balloons with air rifles.

Poles and gypsies - what easy targets, we must be PC brainwashed by the politically correct brigade.

I'm seeing more and references to these two groups almost on a daily basis. And I think there's something going on here. TV progs about Poles. Phone-in's about the 'East European invasion'. Phone-ins about Gypsy encampments on the Jeremy Vine and The Wright Stuff shows. It's a national collective media inspired look-the-other-way brainwash in order not to appear racist or phobic against another minority that has killed and threatens to kill more of us, but is in fact reverse-racism - make a cartoon of them and they won't track you down and threaten your life will they? At every juncture for a quick painless jibe we'll trot out those two groups. Because to mention Islamist's/Muslims fundamental or otherwise is to make us responsible for inflaming 'relations'.

Whatever sketches or comments we make we can no longer mention that other 'minority'. Why not loads of Islamic balloons? Illegal Muslim balloons at that? Not many sketches, (cartoons), on THAT subject is there?

Where're the Lenny Bruce's and Bill Hicks for our age?

Where are the sketches on radio or TV of say a Frank-Spencer-like incompetent suicide bomber who longs to be successful? - Banned from his own and every other group because he's 'bloody dangerous', and likely to 'have someone's eye out' before he's finished training?

Or a take on the videos they've screened on all the news bulletins a few months back in which one of the British July 7th terrorists actually warned and threatened: 'We will continue to bomb you until you leave our lands'.
Which almost begs a skit along the lines of someone advising the Prime Minister: 'That's it then. We've got to withdraw from Blackburn, Birmingham and Leicester'.

Frightened of someone cornering you and screaming, "I keel you! I keel you!" ?

Who declared it was against the law to make sketches about Islam and fundamentalists? If it's not racist to make jokes, jibes and sketches about Poles and Gypsies then the same goes for Pakistanis and Arabs - the two nations most likely to be Muslim. (Mind you is it any wonder we don't, when Anne Robinson made a jibe about 'the Welsh' and promptly received a warning from a Welsh police Chief). That doesn't mean the punchline has to be at their expense, it could just as easily be about our reactions towards them, repressed or otherwise - but to exclude them as a group is racist. We'll make jibes against Gypsies and Poles because we're more comfortable with them than we'll care to admit too. We're not comfortable with Islam. And one form of racism is to ignore them in comedy - it's as if the nation's decided they don't exist.

- Well, it's been a long day.

Quote: Winterlight @ May 27 2008, 9:41 PM BST

Am I missing something here?

I question this, because at the moment it just seems as though the punchline is "The fat kid suffers for being fat". Unless, as I said, I may be missing something.

It's purely a visual thing Winterlight - I don't mean to offend except when I mean to. There is no dialogue. Probably no people, even, as it might work best as animation. Just a rule-of-three gag with hopefully a surprise ending. Not anti-fat, pro-thin, or anything like that. But as a gag the heavy balloon doesn't work with a thin kid.

Thanks to those who have commented, good and bad.

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