Ok here is something for yous to critique. Don't hold back now 
'Love is...'
A MARRIED COUPLE IS IN A RESTAURAUNT CELEBRATING THEIR TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY.
(HUSBAND and WIFE are enjoying a romantic candlelit dinner. They are holding hands and gazing lovingly into each others eyes)
Husband: Darling, we've been married ten whole years yet it feels like only two. I am so lucky to have found you. [Beat] I love you more as each day passes.
Wife: I love you more
Husband: I love you even more
Wife: I love you like it's going out of fashion
Husband: Yeah? Well I love you so much that even though it's going out of fashion, I'm wearing it regardless. It's all about retro. That's love.
(He lovingly cuffs her chin when he says this. Getting slightly annoyed at being upstaged in the love stakes she tries again. Her voice slightly raised and aggressive)
Wife: Well I love you so much that it feels as though it's gone out of fashion and *I've* designed the latest version.
(Husband is also getting wound up and raises his voice)
Husband: Oh really? I love you so much that I don't need fashion at all. I am naked.
(Wife is full on aggressive now)
Wife: Oooh goody! I love you so much that not only am I naked I have shaved completely.
(It has evolved into a blazing row)
Husband: Well I've shaved and turned my innards inside out.
Wife: My innards are out and spattered all over the pavement.
Husband: Ha! Mine aren't on the pavement but displayed for all to see in the local butcher's window.
Wife: Mine has been bought from the butchers and has been cooked and eaten.
Husband: Mine has been eaten and shat out.
Wife: Mine has been eaten, shat out and is being used as fertilizer at the Chelsea Flower Show.
(Man reaches down and produces a bunch of roses and slams them on the table, knocking over his glass of wine)
Husband: Yeah? Well happy anniversary, darling!
(Lights dim)
